Is this autism/PPD or the likes?

[Saiya]

Hi

My son is 3 years and 5 months old. His current status is as follows:

1) General: His pre-school teachers describes him as a "happy and affectionate" child. He has
excellent eye-contact and loves to hug, cuddle with parents/family. Slightly picky with food (e.g: prefers to eat almost bland food).
2) Language: Was a slightly late talker with 2-3 words at 18 months but picked up and was speaking two-words sentences by ~2years. Currently can converse reasonably well (I dont know what the bench mark really is) but can speak in complex seentences and communicate what he wants, likes/dislikes/what he did at school (though not in as much detail as I would like but gives me bits and pieces). Asks "what/where/why" questions. can answer "what /where and also some why. Not always 100% accurate on why questions.
3) Cognitive: Can understand what is asked of him. can follow multiple instructions (E.g: " Go upstairs and ask Daddy to come down for dinner"). Can read his ABCs very clearly since he was 2 years old. Loves to listen to stories and recites them perfectly on demand. Knows numbers from 1-30. Can count upto 10-15 objects. Knows all his colors/shapes perfectly. has a remarkable memory and usually learns new things wih ease.
5) Gross Motor Skills: Can run well, Jumps well in place as well as forward. Climbs stairs up (but not down yet) alternately. Can hop forward but cannot hop on one leg yet. Can balance himself for ~1-2 sec on one foot.Unless i am missing something, no major issues here.
6) Fine Motor Skills: Can holdthe pencil between his thumb and pointer finger. Can write 1-10 though not very clearly. Can undress himself with help (still cant take his shirt out by himself, but manages the pants properly). Can button large coat buttons but not the normal size buttons. Can zip/unzip. Brushes his teeth himself but needs help to do it properly.
7) Play: Plays normally with all kinds of stuff (cars/trains/puzzles/darts/coloring/cycling). Lots of running around.Plays with computers.
8) Social: In general very friendly and playful with everyone (adults/strangers and children). Shows interest in playing with other children. Has a close firend (who lives in the same apartment complex as us). My issue is that I feel he tends to get into fights with other children if left unsupervised. His problem areas are - cant share very well, cant wait for what he wants, also cant deal with conflict of interest very well. Sometimes tends to get very possessive of his things which results in conflicts. Also has some issues with impulse control- the other day he pushed a girl becuase she had a toy he wanted.  Typical problems at play range from snatching or even pushing/dashing a child, if the other child refuses to give him what he wants. Sometimes even hits to get what he wants. Surprsingly he does this more with smaller children or children who he thinks he can domoinate and doesnot usually do this with older boys.From his response, I know that he knows I disapprove of his behavior or that he will be given a time-out for such things and feels ashamed. iT is getting a little better with time, but seems like things just get out of his hand in such situations.
9) General: Slightly hyperactive- cant seem to sit still. Affectionate and generally very happy. Sometimes doesnot respond to a question (and I have noticed that is usually when the answer is negative. E.g: Do you want to eat X. if the answer is yes, then I hear yes. If the answer is " no" or "not right now", he may ignore it.)

behavioral: usually ok but can be non-compliant at times- though this has been improving quite a bit.At school his teachers commented that this was a major issue sometime back but has been imprving dramatically.

Concerns
1) Social Development. Tends to get frustrated quickly if he does not get what he wants. Want to know if this social difficulty is something that he will grow out of or does this need an intervention?
2) Sometimes when he is very excited, he sort of flaps his handsat the wrist. It is for such a small fraction of time that you wont even notice whether you really saw that or not. Used to happen more frequently (like 1 in a day) and happens more like once in 2-3 days or more now.
3) Used to be scared of certain noises like a "pressure cooker" or a "grinder-mixer" but seems to have gotten over them now.

Does this sound like autism/PDD/Asperger or anything else? Any help will be appreciated.

[Sally44]

Totally agree with Mich97.  
Your son seems to be doing okay.  Okay may be a bit impulsive, occasional hand flap, maybe some sensory issues.  But no major red flags.  But, also go with your gut feelings.  If you feel something is not quite right compared to peers I think you need to start the process.  He is quite young and not showing obvious autistic behaviours.  But there may be some autistic or ADHD traits which may become more apparent as he gets older or may disappear completely.

[mich97]

i am not an expert on by any means but having concerns for my son i have done a lot of research and found these forums to be resourceful.. i do not see anything you mentioned that sticks out for being on the spectrum.. maybe someone else can chime in if they disagree??
If you have concerns I can suggest that you ask your sons ped. for a referal to see a  ped. neurologist or a developmental ped. that do diagnose autism (the experts) just for an answer,peace of mind..usually takes months to get in to see one!!!it's better then sitting around wondering/worrying etc..my son has a few "autistic characteristics" but according to the neurologist not enough for the spectrum..a lot of other diagnoses can over lap and look similar (ie sensory processing disorder,adhd) which my son most likely has (too young for def. adhd diagnoses at this point) also, your son should be old enough for the public school system to do some testing, see if he needs services or speech..i highly suggest doing that even if his speech is just a little bit behind..my son has been in an intergrated preschool and gets speech services and i truly believe he would not be where he is today w/ out that....
i can tell you, age 3 was the most difficult time w/ my son..it should be terrible 2's and AWFUL 3's...at age 5 my son is soooooo much better controling his emotions,sharing,hardly ever has a tantrum...
good luck