Creativity and bipolar meds

[breakdance202]

I started seroquel not long ago because I had a psychotic break which led to a five day, involuntary hospital stay because I freaked out and took too many pills.

I'm a writer. I tried being creative tonight, and it was like there's now this wall in my brain preventing my creativity, and this has never happened to me before. It's not writer's block either. It's an inability to obtain the natural high I get when I write. This is devastating to me. I don't know if I am going to continue the seroquel or not.

Has anyone else had this problem? Have bipolar meds affected your ability to create?

I haven't taken my seroquel tonight and of course can't sleep again. :o( I am conflicted and sad and don't know what to do.

[breakdance202]

And it was prompted by some serious nudging by my husband to keep on taking it, at least until I see new doc at end of the month, because he doesn't want me to end up in the hospital again. ;o)

[CRSeaside]

This is great news. Do what makes you feel better !

[breakdance202]

Yeah. I started taking it again because it makes me feel better. A lot better, and it seems to be helping with my anxiety, AND I haven't gained any weight (well yet. lol). Now it's actually making me feel full all of the time. And this morning I did some writing, and it went okay. :o)

[CRSeaside]

IMO you shouldn't be too worried about the Seraquell.
  It's also a mood stabilizer. I already mentioned I had no weight gain on Seaquell.

[breakdance202]

I do have new stresses, like I now have a three year old daughter, so I'm constantly struggling with balancing everything in my life (work, being a mom, having time to write).

[breakdance202]

I was worried that maybe there was something physically wrong with me, so I had an appointment with my primary on monday for a physical and they did blood work and everything, and everything came back normal. My primary is the one who reffered me to the new pdoc I'm seeing at the end of the month. Thanks to her refferal I got in so soon to see the new doc because I was told she was booking six months out! Really hoping I like this new doc. ;o)

During the day I take clonazepam and propranolol. At night I take 300mg of lamictal. This combo has worked fantastic for years because I always just had trouble with the depression end of things and would, once in awhile, just have lovely episodes of hypomania. Longest episode of that I've ever had was three months, where I wrote one of my novels. During the time I had minor psychosis, like seeing shadow people and feeling like I was dreaming, but it wasn't bad.

So I don't know what's going on now. Before I had NEVER had horrible mania induced psychosis. I don't know if maybe in my thirties this is going to become more of a problem than depression?

Sigh. No seroquel last night and now the weight I felt pushing me down is gone and I was super creative, but now I feel like I'm getting high again.

*****.

[CRSeaside]

Don't feel bad about the Pdoc. Mine retired too. Then I went to an awful Pdoc who stated I was on too many meds( didn't understand bipolar cocktails) and was going to admit me to hospital. I had just been released. Voluntary 6 days. So I remember Pdoc who treated me in hospital promised aftercare.
  She's the one who is focusing more on the ADHD than the bipolar. Only thing, I need to find a psychologist. She's no good at C BT which I find useful and important.
  Good luck w new Pdoc. Get into NaMI or DBSa if you aren't already. My Wed nite support group in the states is great. They also have friends and family meetings once per month for partners who need help understanding us.

[CRSeaside]

Hi Breakdance, I'm also creative type of person. I design houses, landscaping, watercolor and I write.
  I wrote a 300 page book while on Seraquel. I took this med with Zonisimide.
The combo worked well for me. No weight gain from Zonisimide.
  But what are your day meds?  The Seraquell for me was also used as my mood stabilizer as I can't take lithium or Lamictal.
   I'm finally weaned off all antidepressants. Yay. For 4 yrs I'd been on Cymbalta ( messes with ability to climax )and Wellbutrin.
  I couldn't tolerate Adderal. So now I'm on 20 mg of Vyvance. Taken with .025 mg of Klonipin.  I feel better on this combo than I have in years.
  My mental issues never required meds until after menopause.
  I know you're younger than I am. But hormones effect everything in the entire body.  So get checked .
  I have a friend in my support group. She had a terrible accident. Hit in a crosswalk. Well during an MRI they also found a growth on her thyroid.
She's struggled with her weight ( she's on high dose lithium) and now this may be the reason.
  So depending on your ins get a good physical. I know you don't want weight gain. Who does?  Ha ha lol.

[breakdance202]

Unfortunately I'm inbetween doctors at the moment because my old one retired, and I saw someone new but she was just horrible. Our initial evaluation appointment lasted maybe fifteen minutes with her not giving a **** about anything I had to say, so I don't think she'd give a **** about my creativity.

BUT seeing new person at end of month. Hopefully it'll go better.

This whole blunting thing is an intolerable and unacceptable side effect. I would rather get fat! I'm not taking this **** if it's going to cause that.

[ILADVOCATE]

   Seroquel and other antipsychotics can cause cognitive blunting as a side effect that can interfere with creativity among other effects. Creativity is separate from mania. The best thing to do is work with your psychiatrist to find a dose that will potentially not cause this side effect. Also this side effect generally improves over time. I have had this side effect from many medications and after working with my psychiatrist I was able to find one that didn't create this concern.Some of my medications as they promote stability can increase my ability to concentrate which will improve my creative work which for me is artwork and poetry.