I have been to the doctors recently in trying to fix my mental health, After informing them that I was feeling depressed with anxiety, they gave me a prescription for citalopram. I could not get therapy for three or four months, so for some reason I didn't bother with it, hoping in time that the citalopram would get me back on my feet. The citalopram at first helped me throughout the first two months, but then I started getting worse, I had really bad anxiety around people, so I stopped it all together.
Many people have told me that they think I might have a bipolar disorder, my history has been quite troubling as I have done many things spontaneously that I consider afterworlds completely mad, for e.g. Borrowing a lot of money from payday loans even though knowing fully well that I couldn't afford to pay it back, getting fired for unlawful social networking, stealing money from my parents...
I seem to have constant mood swings throughout the day. It has affected relationships with many people, friends family and previous girlfriends. Whenever I go out with friends, I seem to have problems. When drunk I tend to have no control and end up doing something very harmful to others around me, people have noted that my mood seems to change drastically under the influence of drinking and other drugs. I have missed many interviews for important jobs because of my mood, I have trouble maintaining my sleeping pattern, I over eat or don't eat at all, I have had in the past, problems with leaving the house and being outdoors.
My question is, Is there anyone I can talk to about this ? So that I can hopefully get a better understanding as to why I am doing this. Possibly someone that has had the same experiences.
If you went to a GP before, try going to a psychiatrist. Those symptoms could be from bipolar, although it's not the only option. Therapy would be a good idea regardless of what you do regarding meds. I know it's something people hear all the time, but regulating your sleep cycle and getting exercise are good things to do, especially for people with any sort of mental illness. Try to get morning sunshine, and consider taking melatonin at the same time each night to help with the sleep and to help regulate your internal clock.
If you want to talk with other people about this, your best bet might actually be a local support group. Organizations like NAMI and DBSA run free groups in communities.
And start keeping a journal and tracking your moods (this site has a mood tracking feature), and bring it with you to your psychiatric or therapy intakes. It is so easy to forget how you felt a week ago, much less two months ago, and if the problem is bipolar, it will be a lot easier to spot with records over time.
It was helpful for me that I got every piece of information about bipolar. I was misdiagnosed with depression for years. I also was confused when started to educate myself about bipolar and find myself as bipolar 2.
Believe me - you will get used to it. It takes some time to digest it. And it also takes some time to get help you need.
My father was like you - very angry and aggressive when drunk, mood swings etc. He was never diagnosed but life with him was a hell and he destroyed all the family.
Pls seek help - you CAN get better.
All the best xxx
I wish there was a miracle cure. i am new to forum and glad to see i am not alone.So many forums are full of people talking about how to get high from their meds. Been on so many meds over last 18 years and not sure what works and what doesn't anymore. I have weaned myself off of Seroquel in last few weeks and not sure if it was a smart move or not yet. It just seems like no one really understands this disease and just keeps throwing meds at you. Not recommending to anyone to stop taking medications but just wish Drs understood this better. Just want to wake up happy and feel normal.
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