3 year old struggling at daycare

[bakermom]

We have a 3 year old son who seems to react to stress by becoming very sensitive to sounds/smells.  He was recently released from his preschool because he started crying after nap and only become more upset when they attempted to calm him.  The director stated he was the brightest child they had but also the most emotional.  We've heard this before.  We took him to a developmental pediatrician who called him the "antiautisitc" child because he is highly social, is highly imaginative, and is overly sensitive to facial expression and tone of voice. Often when he talks to you, he will take his hands and turn your face to him forcing eye contact. He gets sad if he sees a character in a book who he thinks looks "sad," and will get upset if he thinks his teacher has a "mad" face.  I'm concerned because once something triggers stress for him (it was a new teacher this time), he is very reactive to noises and smells in his environment as well as any action he sees as critical.  It always gets triggered at school, and then the behaviors show up at home as well.  The first week of having a new teacher he cried for 30 minutes over the smell of cooked broccoli.  When he cried after nap the second week, they released him.  Do you have any advice for who we should consult next?

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

While not directly addressing your question, it does appear that the school was not very serious about attempting to help your son adjust. They did not display much patience at all. Now, to your point. Your son may, by disposition, be a highly sensitive child. Children have their fundamental temperaments. Take a look at Greenspan's The Challenging Child. It provides a very useful description of basic temperamnets in children. In addition, your son may display some sensory integration issues that could use some attention. Consider an evaluation by a pediatric occupational therapist.

[jdtm]

I might suggest a book which I found to be very helpful - "the highly sensitive child" by Elaine N. Aron.  If you wish, a search on the internet should find the site of this author.  Please note the lower case letters in the title.  Hope this helps ...