2 year old hitting teacher

[moggie129]

I have a 2 ½ year old who is attending a daycare/nursery program. He has been attending the school for about 2 months now and has been doing well except for the occasional disruption or refusal to listen. The start of December I had to change my work hours therefore he has had to start school earlier. Since the change happened I have been getting reports from school that he has been saying “No”. When he is asked why he says “no” he starts getting angry with tantrum and hitting his teachers. They say it happens out of nowhere and he isn’t being provoked. He will just be fine one minute then go up to a teacher for no reason and yell no then start hitting. The school’s policy is no time outs and they can’t always remove him from the class, although recently they have put him in the preschool class (older kids) and he seems to calm down once he’s there. He does have tantrums at home but usually it is because he’s tired or not getting his way. In other words there is always a reason. This has been happening now for the last two weeks and it doesn’t seem to be getting any better. When I spoke with the director of the school she informed me that the teachers have stopped giving him directions for fear of a tantrum which does not sound right to me at all. I’m really at my wits end here I don’t know how to help my son. Is this something I should take him to the Pediatrician for? Is this normal 2 year old adjusting behavior? Please help!!!

[GreatMominColumbus]

Kevin Kennedy "PhD" that answer to her problem is completely unhelpful. All you did was repeat what she said and tell her her son has a behavior problem. Are you sure you have a valid PhD...that is not a question. Sweetie, (if this is actually posted), temper tantrums are common among toddlers especially when they are going through changes, whether you just moved, introduced someone else in the family/home, or switched hours. Even though it's common it's not okay. You should talk to him about not hitting, try acting out scenes that are not okay and scenes that are okay, in terms of handling his emotions. He should have fun doing that. You can also get the book "Hand are Not for Hitting" and read it to him often, like every night. Pay attention to him, and when you see him about to breakdown help him calm down. I tell my two year old son to breathe deep breaths and show him how, he thinks it's funny and forgets about his meltdown most of the time. When you see him handling his emotions well tell him good job! I hope this helps.

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

You already identified the main reason for the change. You altered his routine, and this inevitably causes disorganized behavior in a young child. The program makes a major mistake by not permitting time outs. This behavior can be remedied quite easily, but not if the program fails to establish clear limits and then enforce them. There is no reason for any evaluation. This is a clear behavior problem - it is not complicated.