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Almost 4 year old girl not potty trained
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Almost 4 year old girl not potty trained

My nearly 4 year old daughter is not yet potty trained.  I read loads of books on the subject when my daughter turned 2 which told me to wait until she showed signs of readiness, so I was patient and didn't push her at all to use the potty.  When she was almost 3 I took out her potty chair and just showed it to her and asked if she wanted to sit down, she showed no interest at all and no interest at daycare when the other kids in her class were starting to train.  I didn't panic and just figured she wasn't ready yet.  When she was a little over 3 I started reading books to her about using the potty and she was mildly interested so I started trying to get her to sit three times a day after meals, sometimes she would sit, sometimes not, sometimes she would run away refusing.  I still did not panic and just figured she wasn't ready.  At 3 and a half years I started worrying and started just trying to get her to sit on the potty.  It took about a month but finally she succeeded in urinating on the potty so I figured, just give it a while and it will all fall into place.  That was 6 months ago and she is still having so many accidents and when we are not at home or daycare she absolutely refuses to use the potty.  Both my husband and I have been so frustrated and impatient and worried that she will turn 4 and won't be able to attend pre school if she hasn't succeeded and that seems as if it is coming to pass.  We have gotten frustrated and angry at her a few times (less than 5) over her refusal, we have taken breaks after these incidents and have started fresh again and although it takes a day or two, she starts again but we just can't seem to get over that hurdle of too many accidents.  I know some accidents are natural but we are basically just chained to the house if we want success.  I am not sure if through worrying we have shot ourselves in the foot and ruined her successes.  We have tried rewards, praise and positive reinforcement but it just doesn't seem to work.  Any suggestions?  
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Avatar_n_tn
I had a similar experience with my son. The problem is, once he got to be 3 and a few months he had decided that using the potty looked like a big hassle to him. Why should he stop playing and go potty and then have to wipe himself up?? Instead he just went in a diaper and mommy came along sometime later to give him attention, clean him up and send him on his merry way. I was waiting for him to be "ready" and I waited too long. Finally I had to stop it and this is what I did. I told him that he was big enough to use the potty and that if he chose to go in a diaper then he was going to have to clean himself up. We bought pull-ups so he could change his own diaper. My son is very strong willed so I had to be even stronger and not let him out of the bathroom until he had cleaned up. It took a week but with most children I doubt it would take that long. Like I said, he's got a will of iron. It may sound harsh but it worked and I'm sorry I waited to try it because it sounded so cruel. After awhile we had to go through the same treatment over wiping his bottom. He could have gone a long, long time just calling somebody in to wipe him so he wouldn't have to do it himself. Whew! But it worked for us and I'll be it would work for you.
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Avatar_n_tn
I have a 2 1/2 year old daughter and is in  the poitty training mode.  She does good some days and other days she has accidents.  I also have a 12 year old son and he was 4 by the time he was potty trained.  I would take her to see a doctor.  I have been told its easier to potty train your daughter than your son.  She does good when she is in the house but when she is outside she will have an accident.  I know this probably doens't help but just wanted to let you know.
Stuff141169
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Avatar_n_tn
My son's doctor has said she would do tests if the Kid will not get potty trained by 4. She had also told some kids take more time and she wouldn't worry till 4.  
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