Child Psychology- Home and safety

[jeff]

What is the general effect of a stable home environment on the development of children,especially with regard to "roots" and "sanctuary"?

[Angus Grayshon.]

We learn and develope far more quickly as a child than as an adult. If we could slow the speed at which one developes both mentally and physically we would spend more time developing quickly more slowly. This would be of advantage because we would develope further and know alot more, because we would be developing past the point at which one usually dies. However we would then spend longer developing more slowly in our old age.

[Ralph Pauldine]

My ex-wife has become more civil over the last year which has led us to at least be "friends" once again.This will not lead to anything further but it has taken our 4 yr old son & at least given him the chance to enjoy his mom & dad together recently. We have gone to Disney, dinners, etc. We still are honest & keep reminding him that his mom & dad have seperate houses & work. That we will not live in the same house, etc. His smile is priceless when the three of us are able to do things together. My question is will this hurt him emotionally in the long run? Or is it o.k. for us to have some "family" functions together. At times he doesn't really want one or the other to leave & go home again, but is this normal & does being together every so often outweigh the hurt he feels at the moment one of us goes back home? Any help is appreciated. R. Pauldine (Florida)

[Ralph Pauldine]

My ex-wife has become more civil over the last year which has led us to at least be "friends" once again.This will not lead to anything further but it has taken our 4 yr old son & at least given him the chance to enjoy his mom & dad together recently. We have gone to Disney, dinners, etc. We still are honest & keep reminding him that his mom & dad have seperate houses & work. That we will not live in the same house, etc. His smile is priceless when the three of us are able to do things together. My question is will this hurt him emotionally in the long run? Or is it o.k. for us to have some "family" functions together. At times he doesn't really want one or the other to leave & go home again, but is this normal & does being together every so often outweigh the hurt he feels at the moment one of us goes back home? Any help is appreciated. R. Pauldine (Florida)

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

Dear Jeff,

The benefit of a stable home environment for children cannot be overestimated. Such an environment promotes the development of trust and the ability to form satisfying relationships. Unstabe home environments, particularly during the early years, results in attachment disorders which may adversely influence children throughout their lives.