CHILD BEHAVIOR COMMUNITY
Five year old touching 3yr old cousin

Five year old touching 3yr old cousin

My little boy is 3 and last night I was at my sister in laws house. She has a 6 year old boy a 2 year old girl and an 8 year old girl. The boys disappeared into the back of the house and were quiet so I went to look for them. They came out of the bathroom. I asked what were you doing and my little boy quietly said playing BUTT. My nephew was acting guilty and when I asked him what my son was talking about he shied away shamefully.I said what? Then my 3yr.old  went on to explain to me that the five year old was touching his private parts. This isn't the first time this has happened just the other day when I was babysitting my nieces and nephew my nephew came out of the bathroom crying saying that my 3 year old cut his private and showed me a plastic toy saw. He didn't of course but I thought this was strange so i asked why they were in the bathroom together and told them that they were not allowed in the bathroom together to go potty. Last night after this happened it threw up red flags so I took my son and we left immediately. I talked to him a little more as best as you can talk to a 3 year old and he explained what was going on. His cousin rubs his butt and then his pee pee. When I got home I asked my 4 year old if my nephew does anything to him and he said no but he does to his brother and my nephews sister, who is 8. Is this normal curious behavior for a six year old or do I have means to be concerned. My little boy has been showing some signs of distress and now I understand why. What should I do?
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535822_tn?1337691246
The distress your 3 year old is showning maybe from hearing all the talk about itaswell as the behaviors, and some further anxiety has been caused by the concern. In my opinion this is not normal behavior it sounds as if the cousins are mostly involved and it may come from the older one. iIt would be a good idea to speak to your sister in law as it does seem as if these children are copying it and they will be doing it to other children ,so you have to speak up.Do not let your child be alone out of the way with any children let them play where you can supervise .With your child quieten down on the talk when he is around so he does'nt feel it was in any way his fault..maybe a word with the Doctor wouldnt hurt.
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Avatar_f_tn
Your 6 yr old nephew learned that sexual behavior from somewhere... thats is NOT normal behavior for a 6 yr old child..
Soo... either he is being touched himself by someone older... or he saw his parents/someone  involved in sexual activity and is acting out what he saw......
I dont know... but i do know that this HAS to be investigated ASAP...
*i work with children with sexualized behaviors..*
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Avatar_f_tn
I also would not leave your child in that house un-supervised at all... ever.  Until they figure out whats going on there...
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1350925_tn?1277388125
I disagree. It is very much normal behavior. He was just rubbing him which is completley normal. I'm a dad of 3 boys and have been through this more then once. Its simple curiosity, As well s being a boy and knowing what feels good. A boy just like a man only has to rub their penis once to know how great it feels. For little boys its the same. It feels good so they keep doing it. As for being curious ur nephew is 6 ur son is 3, I'm sure their pee pees are different in one way or another. I really wouldn't get to upset about this. Just keep closer eye on them and don't leave them alone anymore. Boys are very big on curiosity. Good luck.
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535822_tn?1337691246
there was a plastic tool involved so would you also say that is okay for an older child to do to a younger one,2 older children behaving like this to younger ones, no this is not okay not normal at all something you should speak about with your sister .especially as your 3 year old is showing distress. This is not considered  just curiosity .....
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Avatar_m_tn
I understand how this behavior can be disconcerting for the ladies in the audience, but those of us that were once little boys know this is normal. Just about every little friend I had wanted to 'play doctor', and this behavior does not need to be learned; we are born sexual and can figure most things out on our own.
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973741_tn?1333979522
I'm in the middle.  Some things are out of curiousity but when it is a game called "butt" I think more is involved.  I think someone older did it with the 6 year old and now he is teaching his 3 year old cousin.  Child on child molestation is common but still is molestation.  A child that would not have known about "butt" and inserting and all of that stuff at 3 now knows about it.  Wouldn't leave these boys alone and I'd certainly let the 6 year olds parents know what is going on.  As a mother, I wouldn't be happy about this game.  I'm not a lady in the audience but someone that knows kids as well as the next person.  
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Avatar_n_tn
I have two boys one 6 and one 7 and I am just experiencing some of the same behavior. These guys were.licking each other and touching each other. I don't know what is or isn't normal. I would say that it's because of the separation between their father and I but i'm not certain. I have kept a closer eye on them and I told them that they don't disrespect each other like that because it's wrong. I could tell while talking to them that they felt bad only because I caught them and they really didn't feel like they had done anything wrong, so I did explain to them why and how it's wrong for them to touch each other. My 6 year old touch his 3 year old brother a few months ago, so i'm watching him like he's a pervert and as a mother I feel bad thinking that little of my son. What other thing do you suggest I do other then keep an eye on them. I would tell dad but his maturity level isn't up to par for this situation. I told him once the 7 year old got in trouble for the saying the curse word related to a womans part and he laughed. I'm lost and confused with my boys and I can relate to many mom's because we didn't grow up boys and we don't understand where the sexual behavior come from. Granted as girls we had our issues with other girls growing up all it took was a look or no and we would stop.
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