Quietly standing in crib for hours

[CeCe2156]

I have a 25 month old daughter and an 8 week old daughter.  My 25 month old has always been a good sleeper. We've definitely had phases where she would wake during the night, etc. but we have always gotten through it without issue.  For the last two weeks, she has decided that she is not going to sleep.  At first she would stand in her crib, crying, eventually she would fall asleep.  Sometimes we would go and rock her a little more, other times she just got tired and fell asleep.  For the last week, she has been standing in her crib , fussing at first, then she just stops and stands there against the rail.  She will stand there for hours.  She bunches up her blanket and makes a pillow and rests her head on the top rail.  Sometimes she falls asleep standing and then wakes up crying when she falls down, but she just gets back up and stands there.  My husband and I are baffled.  We have tried to rock her, or just continually go in and lie her down without talking, etc.  but to no avail.  The other night, she went to bed normally around 8:30pm ( out of sheer exhaustion, I'm sure), but she woke at 1:30am and stayed awake until we got her out of her crib around 7:00am.  That particular night we tried several things including my husband trying to sleep on her floor, but all she wanted was to be out of her crib and have him holding her.  So, she basically stood in her crib for 6 hours...We realize this has to do with the new baby, but we are at our wits end trying to figure out what to do.  She needs sleep and so do we.  Please help!

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

No, I do not think that such an approach will damage her in any fashion. It will help her to fall asleep on her own and to rely on herself, if you will, to fall back to sleep when she wakes up. There really is no time limit - let it run its course. The situation will not continue very long if you do not reinforce it.

[CeCe2156]

Thank you so much for your quick response.  Just to clarify, you don't believe that leaving her in her crib (awake) for hours will damage her psychologically?  How many days/nights should we let this go on if she doesn't just go to sleep?  How long should we reasonably allow her to cry in her crib without going in to comfort her?

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

Try to change the way you are framing this. In other words, you are framing it as a problem and it is not a problem. It's perfectly OK if she stands in her crib. Mother Nature will solve this. You don't need to be doing anything. In fact, the things you are doing (staying with her, rocking her, etc.) are just what you should not be doing. Let her be and she will revert to her former sleep habits.