It sounds like you have no reason to worry about the dates, but are anyway, which sometimes means that the person is dealing with a guilty conscience and it is easier to obsess over dates than to face up to having had sex with someone else. If that is the problem, see a therapist or counselor about how to put things into perspective. No amount of parsing the dates will solve feelings of shame at having slept with someone else, if that is the real root of the issue.
Or, if it is not shame, the counselor would still be useful in helping you to understand why you are freaking out so much in the face of medical assurances that the ultrasound can't be 4 weeks wrong.
I hope you don't think me unsympathetic, but having been down this road before with posters, I can say pretty safely that when someone whose dates do not add up to the wrong guy is still freaking out despite having talked to her doctors, it doesn't help her to hear the same thing as the doctors have already said. One woman wrote in 105 times, saying "But what if the doctor is WRONG?" and "Would you bet money on it?" and "Are you 1000% sure?" She had other doubts, about her life with a baby and the guy who was the father, and she let them settle on the dates as a way to handle her anxiety. If other issues are on a person's mind, no amount of comforting statements about ultrasounds will help, she needs to address the other issues.
AnnieBrook.
Thanks so much for your response.Yes definetly some guilt issues going on here.I askd for opinions and you gave me yours. No worries. I mean, I think you could be right. I am a big worrier With just about everything in my life, thats just me. So its pretty normal for me to be to be obsessivly freaking out about something like this, even when ultrasounds are pointing in the right direction for me. I know im the only one who could change the thoughts in my head, but i honestly do think it would make me feel better if I came on here and got some feedback from people who have had a similar experience as me, or if people really thought I had noo reason to worry, it would make me feel better, only because I don't really have anybody that I feel like opening up to about this, as far as friends & family. So I have kept this all tp myself. I just dont want to have all of our familys there meeting our new baby, and then for some crazy reason have it not even be his. I've just never been with two people so Close together, so it is kinda scary 4 me.I would go see a counselor, but I can't afford one at the moment.Thanks again for your response.
AnnieBrook.
Thanks so much for your response.Yes definetly some guilt issues going on here.I askd for opinions and you gave me yours. No worries. I mean, I think you could be right. I am a big worrier With just about everything in my life, thats just me. So its pretty normal for me to be to be obsessivly freaking out about something like this, even when ultrasounds are pointing in the right direction for me. I know im the only one who could change the thoughts in my head, but i honestly do think it would make me feel better if I came on here and got some feedback from people who have had a similar experience as me, or if people really thought I had noo reason to worry, it would make me feel better, only because I don't really have anybody that I feel like opening up to about this, as far as friends & family. So I have kept this all tp myself. I just dont want to have all of our familys there meeting our new baby, and then for some crazy reason have it not even be his. I've just never been with two people so Close together, so it is kinda scary 4 me.I would go see a counselor, but I can't afford one at the moment.Thanks again for your response.
You might try a minister, if you can find a congregation that is liberal enough to accept that you had a couple of lovers. It is not that uncommon for a woman to sleep with one man after breaking up with another, and most pastoral counselors have heard worse. At the very least, I'd say, listen to your doctor, and try not to worry.
Take care,
Annie