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How do you deal with depression?
I have had depression for many years now. I had believed it to be stemmed from the severe anxiety and emetophobia I have, mixed with a lot of heavy events and emotional abuse that has occured in my life. Ive pretty much mastered the standard tequniques of handling anxiety, but what i never got were tequniques on handling depression. Im only 17...what helps me the most is being able to vent but, my friends are also 17 and dont care about my rants and issues...they only care about stupid high school things when I am trying to figure out how to just live through the day without thinking about suicide. Im on medication, been to therapy...it seems like no one understands me...how I look at life and dont see the significance...I honestly feel like its everyone else who understands and has this natural human connection and then theres me...and I dont understand anyone or anything around me or why its worth living for...
I guess what im just asking is if anyone has anything that helps them cope with depression other than therapy or medicine cause neither has worked out. Any input is appriciated
I guess what im just asking is if anyone has anything that helps them cope with depression other than therapy or medicine cause neither has worked out. Any input is appriciated
You can help your mom by getting her into a battered women's shelter. She shouldn't have to endure that, and once you go to college you won't be there to listen. She needs help- help her get it from people who are specialized with her issues. It's the loving thing to do.
Thank you both for your kind and thoughtful responses. I am going to college in a month, and have joined a club called Active Minds and the goal is to spread awareness of mental health issues....im hoping there will be a sort of support group within that. I actually have not at all overcome my anxiety of throwing up...pretty much I know what "techniquly" I should do to help my anxiety...read, write, excersize...but none of that helps my emetophobia. Even the 3 therapists i have seen were completely stumped as to why it is such a big deal to me to throw up and how I should overcome it...cause although my panic attacks have become less frequent (seemingly from medication) they are still pretty bad...(to the point of me screaming and begging my mom to kill me so i dont have to be nauseous anymore)..given the choice right now to die or throw up, id die in a split second giving it no 2nd thought. Its weird how severe my vomiting anxiety is, and I think a lot of the depression stems from me thinking about how I have to live my life in terror...and how I can never be normal while having this fear.
I actually have a thyroid condition...hoshemotos disease. My mom has it, so I got tested and found that it is in my system...but hasnt kicked in yet...whatever that means. I used to write a lot but stopped. Since I have my own personal laptop now I think im going to start writing again and will save it as a journal doccument. The kind of emotional abuse that has effected me the most I think is from my parents. My dad verbally and emotionally abuses my mom and sometimes physically...and I cant stand it..and since my mom has no one to turn to, she turns to me...and I mean, I want to help my mom but I really dont know how. She tells me all the time that she wants to die...I just dont feel comfortable telling her about my depression when shes on the edge of her life as well. Its all very complicated!
I actually have a thyroid condition...hoshemotos disease. My mom has it, so I got tested and found that it is in my system...but hasnt kicked in yet...whatever that means. I used to write a lot but stopped. Since I have my own personal laptop now I think im going to start writing again and will save it as a journal doccument. The kind of emotional abuse that has effected me the most I think is from my parents. My dad verbally and emotionally abuses my mom and sometimes physically...and I cant stand it..and since my mom has no one to turn to, she turns to me...and I mean, I want to help my mom but I really dont know how. She tells me all the time that she wants to die...I just dont feel comfortable telling her about my depression when shes on the edge of her life as well. Its all very complicated!
I've been where you've been. It seems like everyday is a fight for your life. Emotional abuse is what caused my depression. What was able to help me get out of that state of mind was getting rid of all the problems that caused stress in my life which in turn added to my depressed state. I had 7 sources. I identified these points and then eliminated them one at a time. Or had to wait until I got to a point where I didn't have to deal with them. It took months, but finally I'm off medicine and therapy.
Unfortunately your friends are not mature enough to understand that there IS a life outside of high school. You are so much more mature than your friends that you've realized this at an earlier time. Unfortunately there were very few people that I could turn to. One who helped was my mom. The bond between you and your parents should be safe...unless they are the source of emotional abuse. (Pick the parent who is more sensitive to you if you're going to try this.)
If you have no one to turn to, try writing in a journal. You can blab all you want about your feelings and it can't tell a soul. Just remember to not leave it out in the open. Writing is a more effective therapy because it can't talk back and doesn't have an opinion. It can't judge you and it can't hurt you. Another habit that doesn't hurt to try is to go on walks. Fresh air, nature, and being alone helps me to think straight and gets me out of the "red zone" at home. You're a very mature young man and you are not alone in this battle. there could be many causes like thyroid conditions or just the emotional state you're in. Please don't let this condition win.
Unfortunately your friends are not mature enough to understand that there IS a life outside of high school. You are so much more mature than your friends that you've realized this at an earlier time. Unfortunately there were very few people that I could turn to. One who helped was my mom. The bond between you and your parents should be safe...unless they are the source of emotional abuse. (Pick the parent who is more sensitive to you if you're going to try this.)
If you have no one to turn to, try writing in a journal. You can blab all you want about your feelings and it can't tell a soul. Just remember to not leave it out in the open. Writing is a more effective therapy because it can't talk back and doesn't have an opinion. It can't judge you and it can't hurt you. Another habit that doesn't hurt to try is to go on walks. Fresh air, nature, and being alone helps me to think straight and gets me out of the "red zone" at home. You're a very mature young man and you are not alone in this battle. there could be many causes like thyroid conditions or just the emotional state you're in. Please don't let this condition win.
Hi,
Take comfort in the fact that you have been able to adjust your lifestyle and thinking to manage your anxieties well, and dealing with your fear of vomiting. It's a great accomplishment, and something to be proud of. It's a great skill you have developed, especially for someone of your age.
Being able to talk about your problems is one of the best ways for most people to "unload" the weights that burden them. Being that you are only 17 and having to endure these intense illnesses is moving to me, as I resemble your statements from when was 17. I am 37 now, but I remember all too well the hopelessness and despair that I felt, and the suicidal thoughts I had running through my mind so frequently that they may as well have been coursing through my blood.
Just as it is difficult for you to cope with these feelings, your friends are going to find it practically impossible. They have the luxury of ignorance. You aren't so fortunate, but have no choice but to learn as much as you can, and try and find some peace in your mind- your heart- your soul.
The problem with being 17 is that medication is extremely difficult for anyone under the age of 18, and sometimes even under the age of 20-23. The hormones that are running through your body can wreak havoc at the best of times. Trying to manouver psychotropic medications into a hothouse of teenage emotions fuelled by pubescent hormones is a feat indeed. What can work for you one day can all of a sudden turn on your and even make you worse the next. With every new surge of hormones your biochemistry changes. This also affects cognitive behavioural therapy. You are under a constant barrage of new intensities of emotions you may have just barely gotten a grasp of.
Being in your situation it is so easy to feel the loneliness of your plight. It's easy to give up on what can seem like a pipe-dream---> a normal life. Your depression is going to create in you a numbness- a vacuum. This is unfortunately normal.
I would definitely advise seeking association with others your age who suffer from depression- not therapy, but a support group. Where you can meet others your age with similar health difficulties, and discuss your feelings, and see what theirs are and what helps them to cope. Finding common ground might seem futile, but it reinforces the fact that even though you feel alone- you really aren't alone.
It can seem too trivial- the things your friends are going through- regular highschool things. Their trials are just as real to them as yours are to you. They can seem so challenging to them, and even though yours are life threatening, as long as they are blinded by their own seemingly impossible obstacles they aren't capable of understading that your problems are actually worse than theirs.
No one can understand fully the trials of another until they have experienced them. I'm sure you would never wish your friends to have to endure what you have on your plate right now. Your only resource right now is your mind, and your words. By learning all you can about your illness, both medically and socially, you can learn to speak to them in ways and terms that they will understand. By using illustrations of situations they might find themselves in you can effectively convey your feelings and explain so they can more fully grasp the intensity of your illness.
Your friends aren't mind readers, and the same goes for Drs, and your parents. The best way for you to get effective treatment is to learn not what to say, but rather how to say it. Since you seem so open, which is so commendable for someone who is 17, being able to put into words exactly how you feel and what you need so that others can not only be taken into your confidence, but also help them to become a member of your external support network.
Right now the world can seem to be against you, but please rest assured that it is not. As hopeless as your life might seem to you right now there is hope for you in the medical field.
Find yourself a peer group. Find yourself in the stories of others like you regardless of age. You can have connections- you can have meaningful relationships. It's just different than what your friends have to go through.
The things you are dealing with now will strengthen you in later life. Your friends won't know what you're feeling until they are much older and start to experience health problems themselves.
You might be different then your friends, but this has one serious benefit. Your experience is giving you the chance to be able to relate to other people. You are one of the few who when you say to someone, "I know how you feel," you actually DO know how they feel.
You are gaining compassion.
This is a gift- one that will help you to relate to ones of all ages, with all health problems.
You and I have connected. Anyone else who comments- they are connecting with you.
You are not alone. Hang on a while longer- things WILL get better.
Take comfort in the fact that you have been able to adjust your lifestyle and thinking to manage your anxieties well, and dealing with your fear of vomiting. It's a great accomplishment, and something to be proud of. It's a great skill you have developed, especially for someone of your age.
Being able to talk about your problems is one of the best ways for most people to "unload" the weights that burden them. Being that you are only 17 and having to endure these intense illnesses is moving to me, as I resemble your statements from when was 17. I am 37 now, but I remember all too well the hopelessness and despair that I felt, and the suicidal thoughts I had running through my mind so frequently that they may as well have been coursing through my blood.
Just as it is difficult for you to cope with these feelings, your friends are going to find it practically impossible. They have the luxury of ignorance. You aren't so fortunate, but have no choice but to learn as much as you can, and try and find some peace in your mind- your heart- your soul.
The problem with being 17 is that medication is extremely difficult for anyone under the age of 18, and sometimes even under the age of 20-23. The hormones that are running through your body can wreak havoc at the best of times. Trying to manouver psychotropic medications into a hothouse of teenage emotions fuelled by pubescent hormones is a feat indeed. What can work for you one day can all of a sudden turn on your and even make you worse the next. With every new surge of hormones your biochemistry changes. This also affects cognitive behavioural therapy. You are under a constant barrage of new intensities of emotions you may have just barely gotten a grasp of.
Being in your situation it is so easy to feel the loneliness of your plight. It's easy to give up on what can seem like a pipe-dream---> a normal life. Your depression is going to create in you a numbness- a vacuum. This is unfortunately normal.
I would definitely advise seeking association with others your age who suffer from depression- not therapy, but a support group. Where you can meet others your age with similar health difficulties, and discuss your feelings, and see what theirs are and what helps them to cope. Finding common ground might seem futile, but it reinforces the fact that even though you feel alone- you really aren't alone.
It can seem too trivial- the things your friends are going through- regular highschool things. Their trials are just as real to them as yours are to you. They can seem so challenging to them, and even though yours are life threatening, as long as they are blinded by their own seemingly impossible obstacles they aren't capable of understading that your problems are actually worse than theirs.
No one can understand fully the trials of another until they have experienced them. I'm sure you would never wish your friends to have to endure what you have on your plate right now. Your only resource right now is your mind, and your words. By learning all you can about your illness, both medically and socially, you can learn to speak to them in ways and terms that they will understand. By using illustrations of situations they might find themselves in you can effectively convey your feelings and explain so they can more fully grasp the intensity of your illness.
Your friends aren't mind readers, and the same goes for Drs, and your parents. The best way for you to get effective treatment is to learn not what to say, but rather how to say it. Since you seem so open, which is so commendable for someone who is 17, being able to put into words exactly how you feel and what you need so that others can not only be taken into your confidence, but also help them to become a member of your external support network.
Right now the world can seem to be against you, but please rest assured that it is not. As hopeless as your life might seem to you right now there is hope for you in the medical field.
Find yourself a peer group. Find yourself in the stories of others like you regardless of age. You can have connections- you can have meaningful relationships. It's just different than what your friends have to go through.
The things you are dealing with now will strengthen you in later life. Your friends won't know what you're feeling until they are much older and start to experience health problems themselves.
You might be different then your friends, but this has one serious benefit. Your experience is giving you the chance to be able to relate to other people. You are one of the few who when you say to someone, "I know how you feel," you actually DO know how they feel.
You are gaining compassion.
This is a gift- one that will help you to relate to ones of all ages, with all health problems.
You and I have connected. Anyone else who comments- they are connecting with you.
You are not alone. Hang on a while longer- things WILL get better.
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