So I've been urging to cut myself. Well, being urged. I got out of the psych institute a little over 2 weeks ago. Things have been going pretty good. I'm 18 By the way. I dunno what's wrong. I feel okay most of the time, I just get Lonely and upset when I miss the people who lived n me that are go e b.c I take the medicine now. It just upsets me t think of what I did to them. So I want to cut to help them forgive met and help me forgive myself. My therapist said I would go back for cutting depending on how deep it is I cut. But the cutting I want to do is something different. Not a simple cut, like superficiality, just something different is all I can say....I just want to know if like, I should do it and not tell her. B.c if I tell her I'll go back tot the hospital, and I really can't afford to go back, but if I do it it'll hold me over until I'm ready to tell her, and accept things myself. Like, I told her I wanted to cut. I'm just confused, it's like she gave me permission to do it, but I think she's tricking me. Won't I have to go back if I tell her due to my past history? Is she lying to me just to get me to go back? I need to do it, I mean, I can hold back but I keep skipping taking my meds, and I know soon it will get out of control. But. Can hide it. I just don't know what to do, can anyone help me or give me any advice....please?........