What makes a person feel worthless?

[bluemonday01]

Why is it that a persons well-being depends on how they are treated by the people around them?

[ILADVOCATE]

It can be from a lot of issues. In clinical depression, as the posts stated feelings of insecurity are common. But life experience is part of it as well. And childhood is of course. But some people experience these issues and don't have feelings of insecurity. And some people with clinical depression (which is biochemical) have not had bad experiences in life. The most important thing to understand is that for clinical depression (which as I'm sure you know is different from "feeling depressed") medication and talk therapy together are needed and for a person who has lead a difficult life, talk therapy alone is enough. Let a psychiatrist make a diagnosis. And I'm assuming your example about work is hypothetical because if not depending on the circumstances you should contact the EEOC but if that is true, pm me as a public forum is no place to discuss a confidential complaint.

[bluemonday01]

Thanks for comments.What I really want to know is what do you think has happened to a person that feels like their well being depends on how they are treated.I know this is not the way it should be and its not that way for most people.Could it be from a very insecure childhood or very bad experiences in life resulting from low self esteem.
Example: An employer talks to an employee in a ruthless manner.This leaves the employee feeling totally worthless even though the employee feels like this treatment is not justifiable.
Comments appreciated .

[ILADVOCATE]

  That's certainly valuable information and a good form of therapy but doesn't it also come from people's attitudes as well? Some people think "diagnosis first" about people and if they find out someone is a person with a psychiatric disability from that alone they want to have nothing to do with them. Even within the mood disorders support groups I went there was "competition" with the people with schizophrenia on the outs in large part because of the stigma of the term itself. I remember once years ago I went to a poetry reading and had taken the night time dose of Navane (that was in 1993). A host of the reading said "are you ok?" as I was somewhat sedated and I said I had just taken my medication and the person said "you're kidding right?" and I said "no" and he backed off from me. Years later he featured me and said "and this guy wouldn't mind if I called him crazy". I did mind of course and I promptly cancelled a reading I had arranged for him on a polite but cold note.
  And remember people don't understand that depression is real not that you've "given up on life" or "can't get into the spirit of things". I know when I was growing up with episodes of depression people would say "just cheer up" and if I had trouble relating to people from the negative symptoms of schizoaffective I was a "snot". We always have to practice self acceptance and there are strong aspects that come from the negative thinking of depression. The problem is unlike other people, there is a good percentage of the public who if they found out we had a diagnosis would want to run. That's why I reccomend NAMI friend and family support groups. Other people have to be accepting as well so in my mind it works both ways.

[LeftCoastChick]

A person's well being isn't. It's your own negative thoughts.  If you are positive thinking, negative comments may hurt, but you know rationally that the person wasn't nice. Folks with depression are caught in a loop of negative thought, so if an external force applies negativity it just affirms your own thinking.  It's up to you to change your own thought patterns.  As an example, if someone comments and says "you're not very bright" in a person who doesn't have our issues, will think, what a mean person. In folks struggling with depression, the person then thinks " yes I am".

It is up to you to break that chain of negativity. It's not easy when it's been a repeated thing. Write down all your positive atributes. Keep it, put it on your fridge or mirror. I also think therapy really helps. I'm going to a program starting next week called Changeways, where we learn to confront, challenge and change our thinking. You might want to look into getting a therapist and/or support group. I've been diagnosed with Major Depression and Bipolar Spectrum. It's a challenge to change thought processes, but it can be achieved as long as you are active participant in your wellness.

[ILADVOCATE]

To be honest it doesn't. People with psychiatric disabilities have been discriminated against and mistreated throughout history. I have disconnected from the people who treated me that way if I couldn't change their perspectives about my disability (but was succesful with many people) and found other people in my life. When you are a child your well being depends on other people because you need them. When you have a psychiatric disability before you recover often people around you are your support system although there are options for independence even within those limits such as supported housing for people with psychiatric disabilities who are unable to live on their own.
  Part of recovery means being a self defined individual. If you obey the law, respect society and stay in treatment then other people should respect you and if not honestly that's their loss. True happinness is self defined and then also exchanged with others. They are not mutual exclusive. If your well being comes from other people around you before yourself than sometimes than can come from co-dependency and other issues which need to be worked on. If you have needs that other people provide for and want to know options you could perhaps describe and I could suggest options but other people don't always have your best interest in mind although they should. Accept yourself and then others will accept you as well in return in almost all cases.