anxiety or depression or stress?

[sammy.j]

im on here as ive lost hope in my own gp!

i have quite a stressful and emotional job which needs alot of patience.im off on the sick at the moment because basically i could not face the world or anyone for that matter.

ive been bursting out in tears if someone even looks at me the wrong way for months and feel like everyone is talking about me an all hate me.i haven't told any family or friends im feeling so low and sat at home for a week with the blinds closed,even the phone ringing would get me in a state.

ive got no appitite and i either cant sleep at all or will sleep between 12-16 hours.when i have a really bad day,i have extreme suicidal thoughts.i was hospilatised after attempting suicide 3 years ago.

when i went to see my g.p (which took alot of effort to go and do),i told her how depressed i felt and i was shaking and crying.she wrote me a sick not stating ANXIETY and sent me on my way!!i was in there less than a minute and wasnt offered any help whatsoever!

[idesofmarch]

I totally feel for you.  Some doctors really don't have people skills and tend to push patients away when they feel overwhelmed or lack the comfort skills.  I know that you've probably have heard or done this already but, journeling helps.  Writing out feeling to specific people or about certain situations then take that paper, read allowed, scream at it, feel the tension rise up out of you muscles and then RIP IT UP-throw it away and do this as much as it takes to get rid of some of the issues that make you feel bad.  Put the letter on a chai, place a photo there as well -release whatever anxiety you can, because if you stuff it, it will explode one day, in the wrong place, at the wrong  time & towards the wrong people.  Also it hurts your health more than you even know. Does your job allow paid time off for a medical emergency, look into that.  Don't stop at just one visit to a PSYC. or one doctor either. Don't give up on the meds that can and will eventually help you IF you work thru the initial try this try that period. I've been in your shoes for many years and even though you can't see the rainbow thru the storm-it's there.  Look past the storm, concentrate on the peace you can have if you stick with getting the right help.  Do you pray?  That helps very much. Keep in touch with us here, O.K.?

[Combat_squirrel]

i know what you mean, i feel like i haven't actually been LIVING my life for a few years now..

i'm not a doctor, and certainly not yours, so i can't tell you what you should take, but prozac is doing wonders for me, and it's had great reviews especially in younger people...i trust it now.

sorry about the job counceling ****, that has to be a pain, but i'd be lying if i said i had never done the same thing...talk to a close friend, family member or even talk to your dog...i know he won't talk back, but it's nice when someone listens, and most people will geniunly be joyious in hearing about your life..and if they aren't, then they don't deserve to be around a special person as yourself...not everyone may like me, but i take the time to listen to others problems and at least tell them what i honestly think about the situation....so, there IS hope out there for someone to talk to... you might try asking a local hospital about the surrounding therapists etc...?? that could be useful.

but i urge you NOT to wait and hope it goes away, because it doesn't...and thats the honest truth,it was a HUGE thing for your to go talk to your doctor about these problems, and you seem to be in defeit right??? wrong, don't be..because it only makes it harder to deal with. it's like dating and rejection..but there are SO MANY PEOPLE who are willing to help you...just take the time to look.

well, i've got a big day tomorrow, and a good night sleep is on my side...(with the help of my trusty trizadone of course..) :D

best of wishes!

-l.

[sammy.j]

thanks so much for that.i appriciate someone listening from the outside..i just feel like no one is taking me seriously and dont know where to go for help!this was really my last resort.

i have been offered counciling with my job and have gone once.that was a total disaster as i got lost and ended up hiding in a bus shelter crying before i even got there and then other sessions would have meant travelling a fair distance after working all day and as you can imagine,im not the most confident driver so i just abandoned the whole idea.

years ago the doctor prescribed me seroxat which made me totally unpredictable and i came off it with out telling them.im due back at work monday and can imagine how horrible that will be with all the bitchy comments!
im at my wits end at the moment,this isnt living,its exsisting!!

write back soon plz,
thank you

[Combat_squirrel]

it sounds like you and i have alot in common, without the job that is...

it sounds like depression and anxiety to me..it's more than just a stress, because when you let normal stresses affect you, and you keep them, you cause yourself more hurt than is needed.

for years i've bottled up all feelings, kept grudges, and felt responsible for everything that happened.....i sometimes don't even want to look at my pets i'm so horrified. Not to mention people skills, i thought everyone had fears of being around people, not even talking about large crowds of swarming strangers...

but i was wrong, it's different for us, we think differently...i suggest trying to find a new therapist and get talking, it's alot of weight lifted off, and even if you cry all the time...it's different when you are crying and telling how you feel...there is a sertain feeling of...being lifted into the air after the day is over...you may not be the happiest person, but you feel alittle lighter that day.

i recently was put on prozac and trazodone to help me for a while..it's help more than i can tell you, it's been a pain to get through the trial period, but i do feel alittle happier and ALITTLE more at ease when having to see people throughout the day...

i'm always on here to talk..

p.s.--&& i still hate the phone!

good luck!