How outta line was I?

[uphill7584]

So my GF and I recently broke up. I initially ended it. Went back to her a few weeks later trying to patch things up. She denied me. I got drunk, wrote a really sappy love letter to her. Woke up the next morning early, saw that she hadn't openned it yet. Remembered he email password, went in, deleted the email. While I was in there I noticed her exboyfreinds name. I couldn't help myself, I opened it. She was trying to get him back. She said she was totally over him and would never want him again so I was suprised....and curious. So I scrolled back a few month to the middle our relationship in her emails. She was going back in forth with him then. Right inthe heart of our relationship when we were supposedly madly in love. She was asking him to get back with her, saying she would take him back in a second. And didn't even mention me once. ..... So I do feel little bad for reading her email, but I really had no intention of doing anything but deleting the one I sent. So should I really feel all that bad.... I mean it was a two year relationship. I was thinking of marrying this girls. I bought her a diamond necklace and two weeks later she writes him and email saying that he is the only one that understands her and that she would take him back in a second if he was willing. Should I feel that guilty about reading what I read. We had access to eachothers emails while we were together. Thats why I knew the password.

[slow_healer]

uphill7584, you're tentatively going thru a breakup/reconciliation. This relationship, which has been serious for you, is still in flux. Why shouldn't you be wary about noticing an email like that? Be GLAD that now you know what's really going on with her, instead of playing games. However, be warned - telling her you read it (even though you two have always known each other's password and having email access was okay) will make you look crazy-stalkerish. I have been in almost your exact shoes, and no matter how you spin it, it sounds too stalker-like to be believable. Because you guys are in the process of breaking up, I'd guess she'll only use it to accuse you of being too possessive, clingy, etc. to justify herself.

First, make sure the passwords on your email accounts have been changed. And (if you can help it) don't feel guilty. It sounds like she's been sloppy in managing her agreements (email access) with you and her other *affairs*. I know you will feel pretty low right now, but in the future you'll be glad to have the closure of knowing she wasn't worth your time. Sorry to hear you're going through this :(

[Cerise]

I really don't get this whole thing with couples having each other's email passwords: where's the trust??? Right from the beginning, it's non-existent. Secondly, maybe in the back of your mind you knew something wasn't right so you ended it. Doesn't matter if she was cheating on you or using you as a back-up: it's over. Be happy.

[ibizan]

i am a nosy one meself..got long nose naturally which got longer living with greyhounds since 93.i'd probably a snooped in the email 2....and thank dog u found what u did for she'd probably still be playing u 4 a fool.Time to move on!Never let any human being treat u like a ping pong ball!

[Jaybay]

Even without reading the emails, you already knew there was a big problem with this girl.  Yes, you overstepped common courtesy with your electronic snooping.  All that did was confirm what you already knew.  Let this girl go, and no more reading email that isn't your own!