Dog almost 15 with kidney disease

[Mezzalee]

We have been treating my jack russel terrier for 6 weeks now with daily water infusions and medication. He did very well the first 2 weeks and then started to decline. He has lost a total of 7 lbs. in this time  and now only weighs 15 lbs. he is sleeping much more, we cannot lift him by his belly, he is in obvious pain even though the vet says he has no pain. He still enjoys a little walk but I need to carry him after approx. 10 mins. His appetite fluctuates from day to day. Last night he moaned all night and for the last month he needs to go out 3-4 times during the night or will have an accident. He is pacing a lot at night and frequently will just stand outside and stare out into space. Also will just stand and stare at a wall in the house. Today he did eat well,however we always dread night time. Is he in pain? Do we need to put him down? I don't want him to suffer, as much as I want him to stay with me. Please help, I need some sound and rational advice. Thank you.

[Mezzalee]

Thank you for your kind words. No one really knows how you feel unless they are a dog lover themselves. My little Jack Russell had the dementia so much so he was up some nights almost every hour. It would start around 11:00 pm like clockwork. If we didn't hear him right away he would urinate or poop on the floor. Sometimes when we would let him out in the fenced in yard he would just stand there and stare and we would have to go and scoop him up and bring him in. He slept with us and sometimes just rolling over would be enough to disturb him to get up. I even tried putting his bed in our room at night with his favorite blanket, which worked for a few nights and then the sleepless nights were back again. He was already taking kidney medication, pepsid and daily water infusions which he started to hate. How much medication can you give them without other side effects? I also noticed his eyes did get very black what causes that? I miss his wagging tail when he would run to greet me from working all day and taking him for his long walks. He was my baby!!! My vet sent me a lovely card with the rainbow bridge poem which I keep next to his picture. I cry for him whenever I think of all those cute little things he would do and miss him dearly. A big hug to you!!!

[gillyjay]

I am so sorry and sad for your loss it's so heartbreaking when we have that big decision to make! All kinds of guilt run through your head but we know deep down in our heart's we have to think of our baby's who are suffering but just trying to keep there strength for us!!!! We lost our boy in February this year with kidney failure! It broke our heart's an we will always love him endlessly I still cry as I don't think it I will ever heal... His memories keep us going an we have his little box with us an always light a candle for him!!!! Some guys on this site sent me a beautiful poem called rainbow bridge! Get it an read it! It may help you a bit... Keep your baby in your heart an cry whenever you want keep those treasured memories always!!! Big big hug to you.. Kind regards Anita Jay xxx

[Mezzalee]

You're absolutely right, thank you for your story. I really needed to hear that, you don't know how much it really helped to comfort me. My Jack Russell also had very labored breathing that last night and when he shake himself off he would almost fall over. I don' t know if his equalilberium was off or he was weak due to the weight loss. He would love his walks even that last day, but only after a half block I had to carry him. I read the rainbow bridge in a sympathy card my vet mailed me, what a lovely poem. I keep it next to his picture I took that last day. I think what bothers me the most is that he didn't look or behave sick except for what I've mentioned and the fact he was losing control of his bladder and bowels if he couldn't go right away. I agree with you, his passing was very peaceful and quick, I think that last sigh was a sigh of relief that he didn't have to fight anymore.
You are also a very good mom . . . .a great big hug to you!

[Margot49]

You cannot second guess yourself.  I truly feel you made the right decision.  I think you know that too but these decisions do not come easy.  You have lost something you loved and need to go through the grieving process.  He will always hold that special   place in your heart and some days will bring comfort and some sadness.  I still miss all the animals I have lost over the years but then realize how lucky I was to have them. It sounds like you had some quality time with him and gave him a peaceful passing, what a gift.
Years ago I had a female Doxie that truly was my heart dog.  At the time, she had to stay with my parents but I saw her almost daily. She developed a mammary tumor that was malignant.  I didn't have much money but had it surgically removed twice ( no other options in those days). After the second surgery, the wound wouldn't heal and was always draining so she had to be wrapped.  She would see me and still want to go for our walks.  She gradually got worse but I could not make the decision to let her go.  My parents tried to tell me it was time but knew it was my decision.  As soon as I got off work, I would rush to their house to be with her.  The last night, I sat holding her in my lap and her breathing was very labored and I knew she was suffering longer then she should have been.  I told my Mom I would take her to the Vet the next day.  Well, it was a long, hard night and she ended up passing in my arms.
I am telling this story because it was a lesson learned for me.  I swore I would never let an animal of mine suffer like that again.  I have had many animals over the years and had to cross that bridge more times then anyone would want but these difficult decisions are often the last act of kindness we can do fir them.
Oh, I still mourn all of them but I also have many happy memories and am thankful they were in my life.
After we lost our Greyhound to Lymphoma not that long ago, I said no more dogs!  I have mostly had pure bred dogs and used to show and train Shelties.  They finally opened a new Shelter here and I wanted to go see it.  Long story, short, we now have a very smart little Chihuahua mix!!  My 6'2" husband has gone from walking a beautiful Greyhound to a Chihuahua.  :-).
You may or may not get another dog but you will know when/if the time is right.
You're a good Mom.  
Look up The Rainbow Bridge poem.  It is always a comfort.
Hugs

[Mezzalee]

Hi, It's a week now that we put our precious little boy down and I can't get him out of my head. Again, that day he was good and did eat well. Howevere, the night before kept moaning. I sat up with him and tried to comfort him with a hot water bottle in the area that was tender. I think that was what reassured me the last act of I've we had to do. Of course he pepped up on the way to the vet and jumped up on me once he was on the table and wrapped his front paws around my neck and nuzzled his nose into me. I immediately broke down and my heart poured out to him. I held him in my arms and continued to speak to and pet him. He just looked at me and let out a deep sigh. I can't help but think maybe we could have kept him for just a little while longer. I just have a tremendous hole in my heart. What do you recommend? It is much too soon to thi k about getting another dog, if I decide to. Thanks again.

[Mezzalee]

Thank you for your honesty, I truly appreciate it. having someone else confirm what I already know will hopefully give me the courage to do what I need to do for my little sweeetie.

Take care

[Margot49]

How very sad.  It sounds like you truly love this dog and are doing everything you can but, and don't mean to sound rash, but are prolonging the inevitable.  I have gone through similar scenarios over the years and, fir me, it really comes down to a quality of life issue.  How much pain or discomfort he is in is hard to judge but he is obviously very unwell and will get progressively worse.  Sometimes, the last act of "love" we can do for our pets is to let them go and find peace.  Hard decision, I completely understand.
Maybe it is time to give him that peace and you can be with him.
Hugs