Being I had cataract surgery in one eye, I thought I would give you my opinion. First the IOL I had implanted was the Tecnis 2.75 which is a MF IOL. I wrote about why I choose that IOL and my experience here.
http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Eye-Care/Tecnis-275D-MF-IOL-Experience/show/2597910
I was the first person my doctor used that lens on. Since then he has implanted the newly FDA approved Restor 2.5 and has done more patients with the Tecnis 2.75. I asked him about what his patient’s results have been with those two MF and he wrote back, “So far, I'm not at all impressed with the ReStor +2.50. It seems designed primarily as a distance lens, and the few people I've seen with it all have inadequate reading vision, even at an intermediate distance. On another note, I'm growing to like the Tecnis +2.75 more and more. “
Now to answer some of your questions. First IMO absolutely do not get cataract surgery unless you have to. I know they say it is 98% successful, but this is surgery to your eyes. Even though my eyesight is much better now I have floaters and Halos after surgery. I am getting more and more use to them, but I would not recommend anyone getting surgery for a clear lens replacement (though you mentioned you had a slight cataract in the other eye also).
It sounds like you need cataract surgery in the right eye. I am confused to why you would want to make the right eye myopic to the same level as the left eye. Maybe you can expand upon your reasoning. I would suggest doing what I did. I had cataract surgery in my left eye and had it set for 20/20 distance and I use a contact lens in my right eye. BTW, my right eye also has a cataract, which needs to be removed, but I am waiting as long as possible to see if any new options come available such as the Tecnis Symfony IOL.
Yes my right eye is still suffers from presbyopia. But I do not think anything you do after cataract surgery in one eye will make it match to the other eye. Your other eyes will still have some ability to adapt while your cataract IOL will not, unless you get the Crystalens IOL.
At this point in time there are no IOL that are going to give you perfect 20 year old adaptive vision, so it is about getting the best vision you can with what is currently available.
You said you did not want a situation where you could only see out of one eye for a month or so while a lens is made. I can only give you my opinion, but I would not let that be a deciding factor. My left eye had gotten so bad I normally closed my left eye to see out of my right only. But I was waiting for the new Tecnis 2.75 lens to get FDA approved. Personally I would focus on what you think will achieve your best vision as your choice here will be with you for the rest of your life. And the first choice you have to make is decide which type of IOL you want, monofocal, MF, adaptive or Extended Depth of Focus.
Obviously the simplest approach is to have this eye wind up as myopic as the other and just continue to wear glasses, but it seems a shame to go to the trouble of surgery and not attempt to correct your vision. I don't know if you've checked on whether insurance may cover doing the 2nd eye as well even if it doesn't have a problem cataract, or considered whether to perhaps pay to get the 2nd eye done anyway soon after, or to perhaps correct the 2nd eye with lasik (which will merely change the power of the IOL you need to use later when that eye does need surgery).
Of course if you do correct your vision, you need to decide what distance to focus it at. People who get presbyopia correcting IOLs like multifocals or the Crystalens tend to get both eyes focused for distance or perhaps some monovision with one eye set in a little nearer, as do most people with monofocals. However since monofocals don't try to give you vision throughout all ranges: near, intermediate an distance, some people choose to target monofocals at the distance they use the most and use glasses at other times. Most target their monofocals for distance (and need glasses for near and perhaps intermediate), but some target intermediate to have good household&social or computer vision (needing glasses for distance and perhaps near), and some target near to have good reading or close-up hobby vision and then wear glasses for farther out.