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IVF with egg donation
Hi, I just wanted to open a discussion with people who are going through or are interested in having an IVF done with donor eggs. I am currently in the middle of my 2WW of an IVF cycle done with the use of donor eggs. Is anyone going through this right now or perhaps there is someone who has gone through a successful cycle and is now pregnant or has a baby already. I would really like to start sharing some of the experiences I have had and would love to hear about yours.
Leatha
Leatha
It's never too late to write a poem about the people you love. I have even written poems about our dogs :).....I know call me crazy but what can I say.
I'd love to read your poem if you wouldn't mind sharing sometime through pm - it sounds wonderful. i wish I had thought of that when i had Noah. I'd love to receive any other book about this - I look forward to reading these to No-No (our little nick-name). I sent you a note - I know about those hormones!! Sounds like you're doing great! - jen
Thanks for the book list Jen. My social worker also gave me a list of books but I haven't purchased any yet. I will have a look at the list again and if there are others that you didn't mention I will post them. Actually I was planning on writing my own book to share with our future children about their births. I wrote a poem when my daughter was born and she still loves hearing it to this day, actually today she started saying it and it brought tears to my eyes (although today has been super hormonal so I seem to cry at the drop of a hat!)
Leatha - I just read your story - it's so sweet and kind of makes me wish we had done an open donation.
I did want to recommend a couple of books that I found and bought on Amazon regarding telling the children about their "special" history: "Mommy, Was Your Tummy Big?" by Carolina Nadel; "A Itsy Bitsy Gift of Life" by Carmen Martinez Jover; and "A Part was Given and an Angel was Born" by Rozanne Nathalie.
I'm hoping that these three books will help us to explain our baby's special birth when the time comes - perhaps you might enjoy these?? - jen
I did want to recommend a couple of books that I found and bought on Amazon regarding telling the children about their "special" history: "Mommy, Was Your Tummy Big?" by Carolina Nadel; "A Itsy Bitsy Gift of Life" by Carmen Martinez Jover; and "A Part was Given and an Angel was Born" by Rozanne Nathalie.
I'm hoping that these three books will help us to explain our baby's special birth when the time comes - perhaps you might enjoy these?? - jen
I will try to explain this as best as possible without making this a novel.
When we first decided to go the egg donor route back in Sept 08 we figured that it would be totally anonymous.....we were at the point where we would not tell anyone, family, friends, even any children born that they were concieved with donor eggs.....(I was still grieving over the fact that I could not use my own eggs and did not want to face that reality....so it's easier to sweep everything under the rug so to speak and pretend) we have since changed our position, hence the open donation.
We are from Canada so our egg donor laws are a bit different but we managed to find a donor finally (that's a whole other blog) Part of the process for IVF with donor eggs here in Canada is that the couple goes through a counseling session...during this session the topic of disclosure was brought up and our social worker brought up a lot of fantastic points as to why egg donation should not be a secret.....especially from the children. She used adoption as an example of how children felt when it was kept a secret and then found out later how devestated they were. So she basically said if you treat it as a fact....and it is a fact of our family....then it loses it's power as an issue and the children don't really see it as any big deal.....she gave the example of telling the children in a non threatening easy going way perhaps when they started asking about where babies come from.....our answer will be something like this......"Mommy's egg were broken so we used another ladies eggs and Daddy's seed and made a baby and you grew inside my belly".....so some such senario...
Some egg donors prefer to remain totally anonymous some receipents feel the same way.....our donor wanted some sort of contact...for example, pictures at birth.....we thought about it and we wanted to know this lady who was donating her eggs.....so we started an email correspondence and eventually met.....it was the most rewarding meeting ever.....she and her husband are really super nice people and we just clicked. By having an open donation it eliminated so many fears that I had regarded ED and I feel I made a friend in the process....strange but true. So I am still in contact with my donor and she is cheering for me as much as the ladies on this site are all routing for each other.
When we first decided to go the egg donor route back in Sept 08 we figured that it would be totally anonymous.....we were at the point where we would not tell anyone, family, friends, even any children born that they were concieved with donor eggs.....(I was still grieving over the fact that I could not use my own eggs and did not want to face that reality....so it's easier to sweep everything under the rug so to speak and pretend) we have since changed our position, hence the open donation.
We are from Canada so our egg donor laws are a bit different but we managed to find a donor finally (that's a whole other blog) Part of the process for IVF with donor eggs here in Canada is that the couple goes through a counseling session...during this session the topic of disclosure was brought up and our social worker brought up a lot of fantastic points as to why egg donation should not be a secret.....especially from the children. She used adoption as an example of how children felt when it was kept a secret and then found out later how devestated they were. So she basically said if you treat it as a fact....and it is a fact of our family....then it loses it's power as an issue and the children don't really see it as any big deal.....she gave the example of telling the children in a non threatening easy going way perhaps when they started asking about where babies come from.....our answer will be something like this......"Mommy's egg were broken so we used another ladies eggs and Daddy's seed and made a baby and you grew inside my belly".....so some such senario...
Some egg donors prefer to remain totally anonymous some receipents feel the same way.....our donor wanted some sort of contact...for example, pictures at birth.....we thought about it and we wanted to know this lady who was donating her eggs.....so we started an email correspondence and eventually met.....it was the most rewarding meeting ever.....she and her husband are really super nice people and we just clicked. By having an open donation it eliminated so many fears that I had regarded ED and I feel I made a friend in the process....strange but true. So I am still in contact with my donor and she is cheering for me as much as the ladies on this site are all routing for each other.
Wow, Leatha, I never heard of an open donation - how does that work? Goodness, I totally understand about the stress - we only transferred ONE embie. They told us stuff about it wouldn't increase our chances of getting pregnant and scared us w/multiple birth stats. I was a nervous wreck because I couldn't reconcile that in my mind. I really wanted twins at the time so I wouldn't have to think about doing this again.
Anyway, your chances are high - try not to stress too much (I know that's kinda funny coming from me!). Visualize a positive pregnancy test, the nurse giving you positive results, etc - that might help you get through the next week - SSBD!
Anyway, your chances are high - try not to stress too much (I know that's kinda funny coming from me!). Visualize a positive pregnancy test, the nurse giving you positive results, etc - that might help you get through the next week - SSBD!
Thanks for your comments and support,
40smama it's nice to know that there is light at the end of this tunnel and I will definetly let you know about the beta next week.....7 days and counting. I guess Noah has a birthday coming up soon....how fantastic is that!!!!!!
Yvette, congrats on your pregnancy, that is so exciting.......WOW 21 eggs.....my donor had 15 but only 9 were mature and out of the 9 seven fertlized so we transferred two and froze 5.....and yes, I found the most stressful part (aside from this tww) was finding a donor that was a good fit for us.....thankfully we did find a wonderful lady who was great through the whole process, we are still in contact as we did an open donation.
Thanks again it's nice to have a link to others who are in a similar situation.
40smama it's nice to know that there is light at the end of this tunnel and I will definetly let you know about the beta next week.....7 days and counting. I guess Noah has a birthday coming up soon....how fantastic is that!!!!!!
Yvette, congrats on your pregnancy, that is so exciting.......WOW 21 eggs.....my donor had 15 but only 9 were mature and out of the 9 seven fertlized so we transferred two and froze 5.....and yes, I found the most stressful part (aside from this tww) was finding a donor that was a good fit for us.....thankfully we did find a wonderful lady who was great through the whole process, we are still in contact as we did an open donation.
Thanks again it's nice to have a link to others who are in a similar situation.
Hi...I did an IVF with an egg donation in December and much to my suprise it worked. They say the odds are like 50% of it working, so I was a bit worried, but it did work and I am now pregnant with a singleton (they did transfer two). I am 16w1d pregnant.
It was great with the egg donor. They got a lot of eggs from her and a lot of them made it to the 5-day stage. They ended up transferring two and freezing 21. I don't know what we will do with the rest!
I am keeping my fingers crossed for you. For what it's worth i couldn't wait until the beta test to see if it worked, so I did cheat and take an HPT about 6 or 7 days past the transfer. I couldn't handle the two week wait...it made me crazy.
The most difficult part for me with the donor egg process was trying to find the right donor, two changed their minds, one got pregnant during the testing but the 4th one did work. From the time we decided this is what we wanted to do until the time they did the transfer was about 13 months!!! It seemed like forever. But it finally did happen.
It was great with the egg donor. They got a lot of eggs from her and a lot of them made it to the 5-day stage. They ended up transferring two and freezing 21. I don't know what we will do with the rest!
I am keeping my fingers crossed for you. For what it's worth i couldn't wait until the beta test to see if it worked, so I did cheat and take an HPT about 6 or 7 days past the transfer. I couldn't handle the two week wait...it made me crazy.
The most difficult part for me with the donor egg process was trying to find the right donor, two changed their minds, one got pregnant during the testing but the 4th one did work. From the time we decided this is what we wanted to do until the time they did the transfer was about 13 months!!! It seemed like forever. But it finally did happen.
Bless your heart during this tww!!! It's the hardest - anyway, I did a donor cycle a year ago, got pregnant and had the baby last April. It was a very special pregnancy, etc. Noah's a darling little rambunctious boy who's the light of our hearts.
I'm here if you'd like to talk - I'm off and on both forums and am always willing to lend an ear or support. Good luck on your upcoming beta - I remember how hard that is - and SSBD!!! - jen
I'm here if you'd like to talk - I'm off and on both forums and am always willing to lend an ear or support. Good luck on your upcoming beta - I remember how hard that is - and SSBD!!! - jen
Congrats on your pregnancy and thank goodness for technology that allows for things like egg donation. Two years ago when one of my doctors commented on egg donors I thought "oh I'll never need to go that route".....HA.....was I wrong. We had two embryos transferred at 3 days as well, curretly I am 7dpt and just trying to make it through to my beta on Friday. For some reason this time around it is more nerve racking, maybe it's as you say there is "more pressure" for it to work!!!
Have you had an u/s yet.....do you know if you are having twins? I agree about this cycle being more stressful (and expensive).....I went through two IVF cycles (and many IUI's) with my own eggs with no success and then turned to egg donation, for me there were so many more "issues" to deal with....finding a donor and all that it entails was huge for me.
Is this your first pregnancy?......enjoy all if it...even the morning sickness :-D
Nice chatting with you.
Have you had an u/s yet.....do you know if you are having twins? I agree about this cycle being more stressful (and expensive).....I went through two IVF cycles (and many IUI's) with my own eggs with no success and then turned to egg donation, for me there were so many more "issues" to deal with....finding a donor and all that it entails was huge for me.
Is this your first pregnancy?......enjoy all if it...even the morning sickness :-D
Nice chatting with you.
In most cases the 35+ forum would be better, however I am younger than this and lost my ovaries to cancer so egg doantion is my only option.
I am 6w2d pregnant after donor egg cycle with 2 embryos transfered at 3 days.
I still feel very nervous about miscarriage. But the morning sickness that has kicked in (unfortunately) and the good HCG numbers indicate the pregnancy is going strong.
I think it is more stressful than a non donor cycle. It costs a lot more and takes so much more coordination to there is a pressure that this just has to work. So far so good!
I am 6w2d pregnant after donor egg cycle with 2 embryos transfered at 3 days.
I still feel very nervous about miscarriage. But the morning sickness that has kicked in (unfortunately) and the good HCG numbers indicate the pregnancy is going strong.
I think it is more stressful than a non donor cycle. It costs a lot more and takes so much more coordination to there is a pressure that this just has to work. So far so good!
Thanks ladies, I guess the 35+ community would have been a better forum....just not thinking :).....my beta is in one llllooonnnggg week away.
There are lots of women here that have had successful pgs w/donor eggs. Right now, I can only think of one that is currently pg. Her name is Yvette. She pops in and out. But, can be found on the 35+ forum a little more often.
I recently did a donor embryo transfer and got pg, but mc shortly after. We are going to try again with another donor FET soon.
I wish you a bfp really soon!!!
I recently did a donor embryo transfer and got pg, but mc shortly after. We are going to try again with another donor FET soon.
I wish you a bfp really soon!!!
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