HIV Anxiety Support User Group
Extreme Anxiety for Seal
About This Group:

This support group is for those who are suffering from stress or anxiety associated with uncertain HIV status. HIV anxiety is extremely isolating for those who are going through it, as it is often very difficult to discuss with friends and family members. This group is provided for sufferers of HIV anxiety to discuss their fears in a supportive environment. Those with anxiety over non-HIV STDs are also welcome. For personal advice concerning HIV risk, testing, and prevention, please post in the HIV Prevention Community.

Founded by joggen on October 4, 2009
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Extreme Anxiety for Seal

OK, I think I have an extreme case of anxiety.  I have posted on teh HIV forum before, but I just saw the anziety forum, adn its been helping me alot.  Here's my situation:
4 months ago, I went to a club and was dancing with a lady.  While we were dancing, I was licking her neck, kissing her neck, and sucking on her neck (like giving her a hickey) for a long time.  She also kissed me on the lips twice, closed mouth.  When I got home, I noticed that I had a cut on the inside of my lip.  It was raw, and open, but it was not bleeding.  It looked like a blood blister with some sores around it.  I then freaked out and thought "what if" she had a scratch on her neck, or cut, or open wound on her neck where I had been licking and sucking, and some of her blood from that open wound got into my open wound in my lip.  Would there be a chance of transmission there?  has there ever been anyone who has gotten HIV from this type of behavior before?  I know its not exactly sex, but it is sexual in nature, and my irrational mind cannot differentiate.  I need to here it from more people that I am being ridiculous, and that there was NO risk.  I have heard low risk, but in my mind, that means there WAS a risk.  Like from dumb and dumber "what are the chances that we can be together?"-Lloyd  "I would say one in a million" - Girl "so youre saying I have a chance!!!!"-Lloyd.  Even if there is a one in a million chance, in my mind, I am the unlucky one in a million that this would happen to.  BTW, I am married with three kids.  Oh ya, and I got tested at 8 weeks, 12.5 weeks, and again at about 17 weeks = all negative.  I am very worried that I gave HIV to my wife, and to my kids as well.  And I am worried that I am going to be one of the "Very rare cases" that do not seroconvert before the 3 month mark.  Please help.  
THanks.  
4 Comments
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1629919_tn?1407244906
Your issue here is guilt pure and simple and your hiv as a way of not dealing with the guilt but dealing with a fantasy of hiv.

Lets not even mention your pointless exposure, a cut on her neck really, like she would not bleed to death?

So lets deal with simple facts. Your tests prove you dont have hiv at all and they are not for debating, just simple scienfic facts.
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Apollo, I wasn't talking about a cut like someone slit her throat, I was talking about a small knick, or a popped pimple, or something like that.  Is there any way that a small amount of blood got into my mouth, and entered my bloodstream through the cut in my lip?  This is what I am afraid of.  Also, I have read the studies at UCSF from what was suggested, and it freaked me out even more.  There they have case studies of oral sex being an extremely low risk, yet every expert on this site says that there is NO risk.  Just an example, and I know it doesn't pertain to me per se, but it is contradictory information like that that makes WW's feel like they do.  How do I know I am not going to be one of the "very rare cases" that ends up seroconverting after 4 months?  BTW, I am not trying to come off as argumentative, I just REALLY want to understand and put this whole thing behind me.
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Also, What about my kids? hypothetically speaking, is there any way to transmit HIV to them just by living in the same household.  Again, I have read a few cases where this has been stated.  Please advise.
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1629919_tn?1407244906
You dont have hiv, you tests have proved that, so all of the above becomes a pointless debate when you have proven tests.
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