Freaking out...

Question

Hi so i am a 31 yr old female, i wasn't having sex for like 3 yrs and recently i was spending time with this guy and first time we had sex we used protection and 2nd time we was suppose to be using which it was in his hand the protection but he tried unprotected. he didnt go in all the way as i stopped him , it was like the penis head that was just in as i didnt see that coming i right away was like wow no no. Now i am freaking out seriously. i feel either its because i havent had sex in ages i am being obsessed to much or i am to old for this stuff. Well that happened on the 21/04/2015 so this week i been freaking out. Now today he told me Listen better we get tested as over a month ago i was dating someone and there was times we did it unprotected and he said he found out she was seeing other people so now i am more freaking out. i told him if you knew you slept with someone unprotected a month ago you shouldn't of tried to enter me unprotected too, he said it was a heat of the moment. Now what i am scared of as i think allot what if this person had something and he is just using this girl thing as an excuse. So far i do not feel any pain or anything, what i feel is abit of belly pain but it could be of my period as in the next 4 days or so it should be here. i dont know why i feel weird. i was reading online how the person can have swollen gland and crazy enough he did have them that day the 21st, he had them that weekend actually. I am going nuts!!! and then i read about how i have to wait weeks before i can get tested for everything. how can i wait 6weeks?? my brain is going to explode. i am so angry at this moment as i was 3 yrs without sex and this 1 time he tried to just enter unprotected and now i am freaking out. People like so i am really scared he might of had something and he didnt say it.

This discussion is related to Student Worries.

Miss_Pebbles · Answer

Thank you, i am hoping for a good result. What makes me in doubt is he is so relaxed about it. First he mentioned it so my brain was already like TICK Tok and then when i am like i am stressed about this, he's like for what? i am like are you serious? so the fact he is not stressed makes me even more stressed.

diver58 · Answer

Relax ! First of all please bear in mind the following facts

1. Risk of HIV transmission from a single isolated unprotected sex is not that high as we perceive.

2. There is a strong possibility that our partner with unknown health status may not be infected, therefore one can not give something he/she does not have

3. Not necessarily everyone can contract HIV in a single event of unprotected sex with an HIV+ partner. Many do dodge the bullet. :)

In your case, the first act was protected, so no risk at all. In the second attempt, he wanted to come unprotected, but it appears that he could not enter you properly and you also stopped him,,, good. This particular exposure does not put you at a significant risk.

However since you are not sure about the degree of penetration, and some risk is there if he managed to penetrate the head of his penis. Your risk is low, and I am sure you are fine and safe, therefore stop freaking out and calm down. Wait for another 3 weeks of so, get yourself tested for HIV Duo (Antibody+Antigen), collect your conclusive report and move on with your life. I expect you to get a Negative report.