Terrified after Protected sexual encounter with an Internet Prositute

[samtangocharlie]

I had sexual encounter with an internet prositute last friday 05/07/2010. I used the condom that she provided. She performed oral sex with the condom on. After that I had vaginal sex for few mins. The top of the condom had fluid could be the vaginal fluid. Removed the condom and took shower, washed my hands with soap a litle bit coz I wanted to get out of there. I have developed following symptoms since that day:

=> Burning sensation on penis. It has become less over the period of time but I still get an off and on tingling sensation on the shaft and some times on the head.
=> Persistant pain in testicals. The pain moves from right to left testicle. When I remove the underwear and slept last night I did not experience any pain and could sleep properly but today even after removing the underwear the pain persists.
=> Went to urgest care on Sunday. Urine test - no infection. Doc prescribed Cipro
=> Went to see the urologist on Monday, He prescribed Doxycycline to rule out chlamydia. Sent me for urine test for other STDs. The course will complete this weekend
=> Developed lower abdominal pain 3 days ago
=> Saw white stuff on my penis this morning.
=> Went to the Urologist again today because the persitant testicle pain has become unbearable. He did the exam and did not find anything in the penis or swollen lymph nodes, etc.. He thinks I have not contracted HIV if I the condomn didn't break. I think the condomn didn't break but I don't know how does the broken condomn looks like?
=> I am completely terrified and I get more and more terrified after reading posts on the internet.
=> My legs feels weak and I have lot of discomfort from my abdomen to my groin and all they way to my right thigh. Left thigh tingles a little bit.
=> I started to develop sore throat today as well. I did gargling and the throat feels a bit better now. I also feel weak overall.

I have a wife and kids and I am married for 12 years. I don't know why I did what I did? I feel so guilty and ashmed of myself and I am loosing my self confidence in myself, Can't concentrate on anything. I am scared that I will loose my job. I am thinking of committing suicide if I am tested positive, I can't face my family if I am tested positive.

Note: Pls note that I have been having alcohol on daily basis since that awful day coz I am very dipressed

[Teak]

http://www.medhelp.org/posts/HIV-Prevention/worried-sick/show/1222122?personal_page_id=1354453#post_5587133

[txkid123]

just to let u know i was in the same boat as u...cheated on my fiance with internet prostitute.... felt most of your symptoms..feared that i might have infected my gal.... feeling guilt and suicidal...hitting the bottle pretty hard just to get to sleep... finally i mustered up enough courage to get tested
came back negative... my advice to u...  get tested and have faith in some higher power..im gonna send a prayer up 4 u tonight.. take care

[joggen]

"I think the condomn didn't break but I don't know how does the broken condomn looks like?

It is a very obvious rupture that results in the condom being torn to shreds, and exposure of most of your penis. You'll know when it happens.

[joggen]

Just sticking with the basic facts: you were not at risk from protected intercourse. It doesn't matter who your partner is, you need to be exposed to HIV in order to have a risk: you could not have had an exposure with protected sex. And only a small minority of commercial sex workers are infected with HIV anyway.

If you read through posts on this site, you will see a common pattern of guilt and HIV Anxiety after protected sex with a CSW, especially when infidelity is involved. None of these people ever end up testing positive for HIV, because they aren't at risk. It is a common delusion for people in these situations to think they are infected.

If these feeling are affecting you so severely, it may be helpful to talk them out with a therapist rather than keeping them bottled up.