In all seriousness continued

[Confused about HIV risk]

1) Oral sex
2) Prolonged deep kissing

Again, these are 'theoretical' because there is no substantial documented evidence to support it.  Also, it is 'theoretical' because, although conceivably possible, the odds against transmission in such a fashion are extremely minute as to be, statistically speaking, so close to zero as to become zero.  Open sores or bleeding gums would be the only concern for these cases, and even so, saliva has been scientifically documented to contain digestive enzymes which break down and destroy HIV (I don't know how many times I've written that).

Non-transmission sources are some of the following:

1) Hand Jobs
2) 'Dry' Humping
3) Holding Hands

etc., etc., etc.  These are not even considered 'theoretical' because guess what?  The skin is an excellent barrier for HIV transmission.

I hope this helps.  I'm not pretending to be the HIV transmission guru, but there seems to be an awful lot of needless worrying going on in the world

[zmythoughts]

I'm interested in hearing more about how the skin is a great barrier against transmission.

[Confused about HIV risk]

It means that HIV cannot 'seep' in through your skin.  It has to have an open entry, such as an open cut or an open sore.

[WorriedT]

Hi Confused. I agree with you and I am 1 of those who worries when I shouldn't. I'm very much a believer that most of the worried well who have not had a real risk have other issues to deal with, whether it's guilt from an infidelity (my current problem) or other deeper rooted anxieties. The hardest part is directing thoughts away from HIV and asking oneself what is really driving the fears. Like I said to you in a previous post, I don't think I would be testing if I wasn't married with kids, but what I notice is that when I interact with my family now, I check that I am not putting them at risk (ie. a part of me says "be careful - you don't know that you're HIV negative yet"). This is totally irrational when looking at my supposed exposure, but it is real enough for me to know that it is an issue I have to deal with.

[Confused about HIV risk]

I agree with you WorriedT, I think most of your anxiety with the issue arrises from the guilt involved.  You seem like a very intelligent, loving, family man, and you probably feel more regret in breaking that trust with your family than anything.  But, I guarantee it happens to more guys with families than you or I would expect.  That's one of my worries about ever getting married, because after all, we're guys.  I just hope you don't beat yourself up over it, and maybe, confront your wife about it.  I don't know what kind of woman she is, I don't know if she'll overreact and a one time slip of infidelity will ruin your marriage, but if she is the understanding type, you might want to confront her about it and it might do more to relieve your anxiety than an HIV test.

I think I need to get another blowjob from that stripper

[WorriedT]

So HIV actually infects cells that belong to the immune system and which circulate in your blood stream. The outermost layer of the skin is flattened and tough and HIV cannot infect these cells. It's like running into a brick wall for the virus. That's why it needs a breach in the skin and access to the cells of the immune system. Mucous membranes are much thinner than skin and have some immune cells circulating in the tissue under it (they will normally protect you against other infections). That's why HIV can infect (although with difficulty) through mucous membranes.

[WorriedT]

I am very wary of transferring any of my mistake and guilt onto her. It's not really fair that I make a stupid mistake and then make her suffer for it. I think I would possibly have talked to her if we didn't have kids as well. In the end, a strain of that sort in our relationship could devastate the kids. That's why I've come to the conclusion that it is a burden I have to shoulder. I may tell her in the future but not now at this point in time. Strangely enough though, I think the test will make me realize that life can go on as usual and actually could be much better than it was before as I've made a lot more time for my family now (ditched a lot of work!). It would draw a line under the mistake I made and confirm I've learnt a lot from it. Only time will tell I suppose.

On 1 level, I envy you! It would be great to have the freedom to just phone that number and get blown by a hot girl. Having said that, I would also say that there is something amazing about having a family. I would wholeheartedly recommend it if you find the right person, even if it messes with your head and the more base male instincts. It's very special... :)

Have a good night!