Thanks teak.. I'm sorry if my question was ignorant.. I would never want to hurt the guys feelings.. I'm so afraid all the time.. I do value your opinion you have helped me in the past.. I think maybe it is time to get some help.. I know I should be thankful that it am okay.. and I am... But i am loosing a battle to my mind.. Thanks again so much and have fun tonight be careful if you go to any halloween parties.. I need a drink and a baby ruth NOW!!
Does your workplace have an employee's assistance program - if so, you probably can receive counseling through it.
Unless you decide to have unprotected anal sex with your co worker then you'll never have a risk.
Seek professional help with your mental issues.