GETSEMANE ( poem of Nils Ferlin)
He was an artist so small and weak
and he felt like such an incredible bore
Then on a beautiful evening he sat down
and he wrote as follows
God have in his photo studio
a darkroom called Getsemane
There clear pictures can appear
for the one who is calm and earnest
But the one - who is afraid of cold and chastisement
will never recive a rose in paradise
Hes life turnes out like a bare flat
that no silvertears has made wet
Maybe hes days went in purpura and glory
but the glance in his eye was the glance of a begger
He got to the ashes but never to fire
and the moon smiles towards his empety hand
For the one who is afraid of Getsemane
has nothing at all either to get or to give
Just wanna say this I´m a so cald addicted personality, whatever stimulate me I can´t get enough of, it cold be alcohol, drugs, gamble. nikotin.unhealthy sex( sex without true respect) coffee, work, sport, golf, crapfood, religion, politic ,wanna know whats right, talk a lot and much more just mentioned some I have been doing.
My father has a grandios narcissistic personality he never could give any encouragement he was just competing with me and my brother, so we are both understimulatet I´ve been struggling with this issue for the last 22 years, either I have to avoid things that give fast stimulation or at least the on that are most destructiv.
But I´m so tired of being over observativ on my own behavior, make me kind of narcissistic i think( the apple dont fall far from the tree)
The thing I´m hoping for know is that somehow I will be able finish my own Getsemane.
I´m to old to continue fantasizing about ever being restored and healed completely in this lifetime.
But I have this fantasy that if I one day can learn to cope with who I am, with wounds that probebly never will go away, I maybe can drink a beer or a glas of wine if I want to.
Last time I drank any alcohol was in august 1986.
God bless you all, see you in Getsemane (this tx and disease surely feels like a part of that garden).
ca
The alcohol topic seems to cause as much trouble,like talking bout religion...too much for me so ill leave it alone
id rather have my eye teeth pulled out than discuss alcohol or religion again...all i have to say is ill be having a drink if i go SVR.
I think another spin on this is to look at it in terms of it's not how much someone drinks, but what happens when they drink. Tons of people drink socially everyday and lead good productive lives with no adverse effects. An alcoholic can be very high functioning for a long time but at some point it will destroy their life. Drinking is a large part of our socialogical interaction anymore. It's the "Soma" society uses like in the book Brave New World. Unfortunately, those of us with hepc don't have the liberties with alcohol that others who never had it do. Henceforth, how much we drink directly effects what happens to our future health.
Trin
Comeagain is also correct in sayin the word alcholic is is a label to describe the drinking methods we humans induldge in....i do agree with on glass of wine aday...but again,who knows,maybe they just say that so we keep on boozing...why not drink grape juice...again seem lilke it all boils down the almighty dollar...same with the new coffee news that its good for the liver...i think thats a scam by the food industy to keep us doing caffine...now a ONE cup of coffee a day i have now anyway...HAVE A DRINK ON ME....AC/DC....only if you are svr.
Somebody most know someone.
Sorry if you misunderstood what i meant...there is a difference between drinkin ONE glass of wine a day for ones health and social drinking...what im saying is if you drink socially your sre an alcohlic....but my point alaso is....who can drink only ONE glass a day?
Pretty sad that you have a view that anyone that enjoys a glass of wine to relax... is an alcoholic. To me an ability to stop after one and enjoy one of life's pleasures is ok if you liver is good.
Get some sleep, my friend. See ya in the morning.
jd
Forget what I just said its the middle of the night where I am and frankly i dont know why an what I´m talking about.
Please forgive my lack of self-control
ca
We could probably land another probe on Mars before an alcohol debate would ever conclude.
I´m very much agree with rocker we all alcoholists but I will rather say non of us is.
I dont like that word think its a way to put a label on an issue that prevent us from thinking any further.
ca
ps and for some people such as my self, everything is allowed but not everything is healthy.
Depends on your definition of the word alcoholic...to me he who drinks is....either you are or you aint....no inbetween...now thats my opinion and i respect yours.
I am just coming up to a hopeful SVR. I probably don't have liver damage as I was treated imediatley following acute, although I had severe acute symptoms, and a nasty high ALT for a while, which might indicate something.
I though during treatment I would never drink again, just not worth the risk. Now I am not so sure, and struggling to make up my mind. I see advertising for a cold Stelar, and I can't help thinking it would be very enjoyable on a hot day. But my issue in the past, is that it is hard for me to drink one, without another, then another. Wasn't that healthy regardless of the Hep C, maybe I am better off without that anyway? Difficul decision...
I must disagree. We are not all alcoholics, though I agree we all have our baggage.
Cocaine and the heavy drugs are probly more of an addiction problem to heppers than booze anyway.
I think we are all alcholics,we all drink to get that good euphoric feeling....just some go to extremes...i was a weekend warrior....even if you say your a social drinker...you are and alchololic...its pretty hard to just drink one glass of wine a day for ones heath too i would think.dont get me started on cocaine.
I agree with you as well. My doc said the exact same thing. With the degree of fibrosis I have - scar tissue (dead rock hard cells) what healthy tissue can regenerate over that? Nothing to hold on to. The portion of my liver that is not effected will have to over compensate for the damaged area which I'm quite sure it's already doing. I don't want to take that risk either. I do not believe nor will ever that I can conduct my life as if I never had HCV regarless of SVR. My thinking, my lifestyle, my health have been permanently altered. Perhaps that was the plan after all. If I get SVR it doesn't mean I'll change careers and become an "Ice Road Trucker" because I beat the odds so I probably won't fall through the ice.
Trin
Hey, lets all get hammered and go rob some banks. Then we can hit the Wendy's drive thru. (I'll give up my cheesburger when they pry it out of my cold, dead hands!)
Seriously though - my doc and I were discussing EOT the other day and she said my liver would likely recover somewhat but no guarantees and no way to know how much without follow-up bx. Then we discussed SVR (I love this woman, its always WHEN you SVR, not IF you SVR) and I said thats the day we really celebrate. She said yes, go out for drinks. I said "drinks for YOU" and she said "right" So I'm not planning on drinking again, except maybe a sip of the champagne toast at a wedding. Never was a big drinker so its no hardship - just reality! Too much risk and not worth it after all this effort to clear the virus.
OK thats it. I'm leaving work in ten minutes and buying a half gallon of Carlo Rossi and downing it today.
But I ain't givin up my cheeseburgers - you can take my liver and my sobriety and all of that but not my cheeseburgers!
I do find it ironic though that the two NY doctors that I went to and asked the drinking question to said UNARGUABLY DEFINITELY NOT if you have liver damage and Dr. Jacobson even went so far as to qualify it by saying that Any doctor who would advise a patient with liver damage that drinking moderately was ok obviously was in the wrong field and he had "never" met anyone who would disagree.
I would have thought one of the top liver guys in the world and another NYC doctor would have known better than to lie like that. it still make just no sense to me how Dr. J can be responsible for almost all of the big studies ever published yet he wouldn't know it's perfectly fine to go out and have a couple JD and cokes every few days rather than to eat a cheeseburger.
Just mystified.
Very odd to me.
My 2 cents.....
I am nearly 3 months EOT and my doc said I could go back to having wine again if I wish and resume my "normal" habits. He feels like Jim's doc that it has health merits if not abused. He also believes I am cured (no proof yet) so I want to wait until I know for sure. I am lucky though with no permanent damage.
I also believe if alcohol was a problem before treating it will most certainly be after so the occasional drink may turn into something else. I love Jim's anology for I too smoked over a pack a day until 2001. I can't trust myself either to try cigs again.
I also have to agree with Jim that one may abstain from alcohol, but I too would question how healthy a diet is that contains 3 or 4 sodas a day. High fructose corn syrup or artificial sweetners are certainly not on a "good" diet.
Everything in moderation seems to be the key though!
Ilene, hopefully this "change" in your life is temporary and you will eventually be able to put this all behind you!
Good Health too you!
Pam
Doesn't sound like any woman I ever met. She is a woman isn't she? It's really not my business what she is as long as you're happy. Mike
NY,
One could argue that a diet of "cheeseburgers and junk food" -- also too much sucrose, etc -- is much worse for your liver than let's say a daily glass of red wine. And that's regardless of liver damage or HCV status -- positive or SVR, IMO. BTW I've made some progress with the post tx "gut" issue on a lower carb, South Beach type of diet. You might want to get the book if so inclined but alas no Cheeseburger recipies if I remember correctly.
Mike,
Not sure if I can elaborate or elucidate any more without offending the children, but I will say that the good thing about "Jenna" is that she never says squat no matter what I do or when.
I Love you Rocker - I'm glad I can get all the pictures of you going bucka*s crazy rock n roll wild outta my head for good :)
SVR does make us wanna party though - just we gotta remember unless we've been biopsied who knows where our livers REALLY stand or not. I'd love to pretend I'm down to stage 1 after 72 weeks of treatment but that just doesn't seem realistic to me and God knows i dont wanna start the fibrosis going back the other way cause I start downin a fifth a day! (And I know me...you could call me JrRock4 if I wasn't so addicted to cheeseburgers and junk food ;)