Down

[gauf]

Feeling kind of down. I am a 2x relapser with cirrhosis. Now, I find out I have steatosis. Losing weight is damn hard. When I think of what is coming (again), and the fact that I can't get a hold of alinia, or get my doc to ok double dosing, I wonder if it's worth it. I mean i don't feel my odds are very good for SVR. I have lately been thinking that maybe it's just the way it is, why NOT me?  Thinking about dying and trying to come to terms with it. Not angry anymore....just starting to accept that maybe I am just supposed to go. Thinking about how long I can last. Spirituality too.  I know some of you must have felt this way... I am not a quiter, but, well some of us just can't win no matter what it seems. Not even looking for advice really, I just can't say what i am feeling to my family as they will not understand.

[gauf]

Thanks for the encouragement, I am soooo grateful for the forum.

[susan400]

Gauf,

I know how you feel, but please don't give up!   There will be something down the road...

Susan

[mremeet]

Not sure what your treatment history is (other than you relapsing twice previously), but why don't you think about taking up the fight again? Like you said, tap into Alinia, elevated doses of riba, elevated doses of IFN, procrit, neupogen, 72 week regimen...the works. And prepare yourself by losing weight before going into it, put yourself in peak fighting form (remembering that low BMI optimizes odds of success). Force yourself to develop a strong sense of purpose with a definitive goal in mind. Focus on what it is you want to accomplish (that being SVR), and think long and hard about every single thing within your power to bring that about. Visualize victory, know that it's within your grasp, understand that it IS possible. And that ain't just some BS pep talk, it REALLY is! Don't go quietly, when it comes to this sort of thing you gotta step up - ya just gotta!!

[Forseegood]

I totally agree with you, as much as I can't stand the summers now (with hot flashes it's a bit too much for we ladies of a certain *maturity* lol....) I think the change of weather has something to do with out outlook...I"ve been really doubling up on the positive reading, mediations lately to help change my mindset, or I'd be a screaming mimi...hope youre well!

Gauf: my sister has been going and going for years now on decompensated cirrhosis....sometimes I think all this info we have deal with stats, etc...it doesn't always apply to us individually, a very small percentage of us kick the bucket with this, very small percentage, relatively speaking...

Goldyn: just wanted to say, nice to see you!

[sfwandwow]

my hubby told me he saw on news that they have found a cure for cirrhoses( cant spell).  he didnt get to catch it all but i thought wow this is great for all people..GOD is using man to heal us..  have a great evening

[charm27]

Sorry you are down....its not easy which we all know. I totally agree with what Foreseegood said and Goldyn..its true.

Besides...I think a depression cycle is defintely going around and smacking us in the head.
You will beat this somehow someway and hopefully very soon.

The Best To You