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HSV-2 and questions
My wife (of nearly 20 years) was just diagnosed with HSV-2. We know why and are trying to work through those issues separately. Needless to say, the diagnosis of HSV-2 has only made matters worse. I have scoured the internet and have come up with a lot of conflicting answers. I am turning to this group to help me make sense of it all.
1) We have 2 sons. What kind of lifestyle changes do we need to make to prevent passing this on to them? Can we still kiss them goodnight? Can they grab a drink from our glass? What things am I not considering???
2) I have not yet been tested. I am fully convinced I have it as well (I believe my breakout happened over the summer and at the time I thought it was poison ivy...has happened a few times since). Are there benefits to me being tested?
3) We recently had oral sex about a week after when I thought I had poison ivy. About a week or two later, her lymph nodes were incredibly swollen and her throat was a horrible mess. She went to the Dr. and he told her it was pharyngitis. About a week later, I had the same symptoms...so, I assume we now have HSV-2 orally as well. How do we confirm this? Will future breakouts just happen in the throat (like the first one) or will we get this on our lips and face as well?
4) Will my wife and I "ping-pong" this virus back and forth? We both love our sex life and want it to continue. But, we are concerned about making things worse. I have this huge fear of her performing fellatio and just getting worse. And the only way she can orgasm is if I perform cunnilingus and she is so scared of me doing this.
5) I guess I just have this underlying fear of the two of us ending up with the virus all over the place on our bodies. Does it always pop up at the same place or just a generalized area? In other words, if my breakouts all happen just beneath the head of my penis, will they always happen there, or will further sexual contact with my wife spread this to other areas of my body as well???
1) We have 2 sons. What kind of lifestyle changes do we need to make to prevent passing this on to them? Can we still kiss them goodnight? Can they grab a drink from our glass? What things am I not considering???
2) I have not yet been tested. I am fully convinced I have it as well (I believe my breakout happened over the summer and at the time I thought it was poison ivy...has happened a few times since). Are there benefits to me being tested?
3) We recently had oral sex about a week after when I thought I had poison ivy. About a week or two later, her lymph nodes were incredibly swollen and her throat was a horrible mess. She went to the Dr. and he told her it was pharyngitis. About a week later, I had the same symptoms...so, I assume we now have HSV-2 orally as well. How do we confirm this? Will future breakouts just happen in the throat (like the first one) or will we get this on our lips and face as well?
4) Will my wife and I "ping-pong" this virus back and forth? We both love our sex life and want it to continue. But, we are concerned about making things worse. I have this huge fear of her performing fellatio and just getting worse. And the only way she can orgasm is if I perform cunnilingus and she is so scared of me doing this.
5) I guess I just have this underlying fear of the two of us ending up with the virus all over the place on our bodies. Does it always pop up at the same place or just a generalized area? In other words, if my breakouts all happen just beneath the head of my penis, will they always happen there, or will further sexual contact with my wife spread this to other areas of my body as well???
It was a bad genital herpes breakout. We never do share them; but, for some reason, my son just did. After I confronted him, he said he had been doing it for about a week or so. Even though (after my wife was diagnosed) we made sure to reinforce the whole not sharing rule. I am literally sick to my stomach...
we don't recommend sharing of bath scrubbies in general. many bacteria and germs thrive on those.
a bad break out of what?
a bad break out of what?
Ugh. So, I am in the middle of a rather bad breakout. And, I notice that my son has just used the bath scrubber I use. He took a shower about 30-minutes after me. The last thing I wash is down there...please tell me he can't get this!
oral swabs are how they test for oral std's.
her contracting hpv wouldn't trigger yours to reoccur even if it was the exact same type.
you usually can't see signs of hpv infection in females either externally or internally unless there are obvious warts.
her contracting hpv wouldn't trigger yours to reoccur even if it was the exact same type.
you usually can't see signs of hpv infection in females either externally or internally unless there are obvious warts.
Sorry to bring this up again, but she is hoping to schedule her OB appointment soon.
The strain of HPV that causes my problem is one of the strains that causes genital warts; so, the correlation is very possible. I guess I will just have to ask her to get screened like you indicated and hope I don't go through this routinely. Can she ask her OBGYN to "look around" for signs of HPV that may not be on her cervix? Needless to say, this one causes me some distress.
So, how do they screen for STDs contracted orally? Hypothetically, if she contracted one of them orally, how would they need to screen me? I just found out that her oral sex was all performed unprotected.
So, how do they screen for STDs contracted orally? Hypothetically, if she contracted one of them orally, how would they need to screen me? I just found out that her oral sex was all performed unprotected.
you have to specifically ask for hpv testing on the cervix. A routine pap test only looks for cervical cells changes, it's not hpv testing. Cervical testing for hpv doesn't look for hpv externally, only on the cervix. All that said, not likely your wife contracting a different type of hpv would trigger a flare up of yours.
no, urine testing won't detect oral std's.
if her testing was all done 3 months after she last had another partner, no reason to repeat any of it.
no, urine testing won't detect oral std's.
if her testing was all done 3 months after she last had another partner, no reason to repeat any of it.
Thanks.
I understand that many STDs can be passed orally. The STD tested for Chlamydia and Gonorrhea via urine test. If these were contracted orally, would they show up in a urine test? With the pharyngitis, the Dr. prescribed two rounds of antibiotics; so, it may not be an issue anyway.
I am just a bit concerned because just after the first affair, I started having some serious health problems. Fatigue, foggy thinking, loss of hair on my legs, leg numbness, severe joint and muscle pain. This led to a year of various tests by my Dr. Just trying to figure out what I should get tested for.
Also, it has was about 3-months between the last affair and the mouth swab for HIV. That tested negative. Should she re-test, and if so, when?
Finally, I have RRP (basically, HPV located in my airway) that had been in remission for the last 8-years; but, this last year I had a flare up. Just this last year, I had a break-out. Needless to say, I am a bit concerned that she has contracted HPV and (though rare) it has caused my flare up. PP had refused to do a pap smear (because she had one 2-years ago). We are going to her OB for a pap; but, how effective is a pap at identifying HPV? Is there another analysis we should consider?
Again, thanks for your time and help. This has been a rough ride; but, finding some truth about what we have been exposed to has made it considerably easier.
I understand that many STDs can be passed orally. The STD tested for Chlamydia and Gonorrhea via urine test. If these were contracted orally, would they show up in a urine test? With the pharyngitis, the Dr. prescribed two rounds of antibiotics; so, it may not be an issue anyway.
I am just a bit concerned because just after the first affair, I started having some serious health problems. Fatigue, foggy thinking, loss of hair on my legs, leg numbness, severe joint and muscle pain. This led to a year of various tests by my Dr. Just trying to figure out what I should get tested for.
Also, it has was about 3-months between the last affair and the mouth swab for HIV. That tested negative. Should she re-test, and if so, when?
Finally, I have RRP (basically, HPV located in my airway) that had been in remission for the last 8-years; but, this last year I had a flare up. Just this last year, I had a break-out. Needless to say, I am a bit concerned that she has contracted HPV and (though rare) it has caused my flare up. PP had refused to do a pap smear (because she had one 2-years ago). We are going to her OB for a pap; but, how effective is a pap at identifying HPV? Is there another analysis we should consider?
Again, thanks for your time and help. This has been a rough ride; but, finding some truth about what we have been exposed to has made it considerably easier.
you sure can ask other std questions here :) saves me from having to talk to you on this board and the std board both!
thank you for getting her results to post for me :) her hsv2 is positive and above the typical false positive cut off rate of 3.5. There are still some false positives under the result of 5 so since she's had no symptoms, up to you both if you feel further confirmatory testing is in order or not to confirm her status. since she's had no symptoms ( though it can present as uti type symptoms too ), not a bad idea to get a herpes WB if you test negative for hsv2 when you test.
thank you for getting her results to post for me :) her hsv2 is positive and above the typical false positive cut off rate of 3.5. There are still some false positives under the result of 5 so since she's had no symptoms, up to you both if you feel further confirmatory testing is in order or not to confirm her status. since she's had no symptoms ( though it can present as uti type symptoms too ), not a bad idea to get a herpes WB if you test negative for hsv2 when you test.
Thanks for the advice. She was able to go in and speak with a manager and get her results. Testing was done approximately 2-3 months since the other partner.
HSV-1 IgG <0.90
HSV-2 IgG 4.843
Not sure if this is high or not, but the test indicates anything above 1.10 is positive.
I realize that this is a Herpes board, but can I ask a couple general STD related questions please?
HSV-1 IgG <0.90
HSV-2 IgG 4.843
Not sure if this is high or not, but the test indicates anything above 1.10 is positive.
I realize that this is a Herpes board, but can I ask a couple general STD related questions please?
HIPAA rules say that if she asks for her results of any test, she must be provided with them. if she can get a copy of her test results for you to post, I can see if she needs additional confirmatory testing done. Not all PP offer type specific testing as well as there are false positive issues so seeing her actual test results will be very helpful - e.g. hsv 1 igg 6.5 and hsv2 igg 4.3 or whatever they are. also did she have her testing done at least 3 months after having sex with another partner?
as I said, assume nothing when it comes to herpes. If you both do in fact have hsv2, you can have sex whenever you want , including during obvious recurrences. If you don't have hsv2 and she does, the odds of you contracting it are very low in general even if you just avoid sex anytime she has anything going on genitally. not worth just assuming you have it since you'll always have that little worry in the back of your head. Knowing your status for sure will probably save you a lot of going over your genital area for a few years with the proverbial fine tooth comb.
yes you'd need lesion cultures early on of your oral area to confirm hsv2 orally. really no reason to think this is hsv2 orally though.
as I said, assume nothing when it comes to herpes. If you both do in fact have hsv2, you can have sex whenever you want , including during obvious recurrences. If you don't have hsv2 and she does, the odds of you contracting it are very low in general even if you just avoid sex anytime she has anything going on genitally. not worth just assuming you have it since you'll always have that little worry in the back of your head. Knowing your status for sure will probably save you a lot of going over your genital area for a few years with the proverbial fine tooth comb.
yes you'd need lesion cultures early on of your oral area to confirm hsv2 orally. really no reason to think this is hsv2 orally though.
And, she didn't have any outward signs of infection; though she did have UTI like symptoms quite a few times...
Thank you for your quick reply.
She was tested at Planned Parenthood. All they will tell us is that she is HSV-2 positive. They won't tell us the results, the type of test used, nothing...
I have downloaded the book and begun reading. There is a lot of great information there. Definitely puts my mind at ease a bit.
How do we know if we have this orally? Would we have had to get a swab of the area at the time? I understand it is highly unlikely...but, just looking at when everything happened, it all lines up.
And, sorry to belabor a question...but, what is the overall benefit of my being tested? If I am negative, we are not going to get divorced over this (though it may create a desire in her to not be with me to prevent me from getting it). Just trying to understand.
Thanks again...
She was tested at Planned Parenthood. All they will tell us is that she is HSV-2 positive. They won't tell us the results, the type of test used, nothing...
I have downloaded the book and begun reading. There is a lot of great information there. Definitely puts my mind at ease a bit.
How do we know if we have this orally? Would we have had to get a swab of the area at the time? I understand it is highly unlikely...but, just looking at when everything happened, it all lines up.
And, sorry to belabor a question...but, what is the overall benefit of my being tested? If I am negative, we are not going to get divorced over this (though it may create a desire in her to not be with me to prevent me from getting it). Just trying to understand.
Thanks again...
let's start at the beginning - how was your wife tested for hsv2? did she have obvious lesions that she had cultured, blood testing or just a visual diagnosis of hsv2?
do you both have hsv2 orally? Incredibly unlikely. You won't ping pong the virus back and forth and whoever had it first, had significant protection against contracting hsv2 orally later on. The incidence of hsv2 oral infections are overall very low and don't reoccur. Much more likely that the sore throats are a non-std related viral upper respiratory illness.
your sons - not an issue at all! genital herpes is called a sexually transmitted infection because it takes that kind of naked and intimate contact to transmit it. it's not transmitted from routine day to day contact.
do you need tested? yes you do! assume nothing and know for sure who has what.
will you two spread herpes to other body parts by having sex? no you will not.
google the free herpes handbook by Terri Warren too. she's our herpes expert here on medhelp and her free handbook goes over the basics for more details than what I've provided.
keep asking questions!!
grace
do you both have hsv2 orally? Incredibly unlikely. You won't ping pong the virus back and forth and whoever had it first, had significant protection against contracting hsv2 orally later on. The incidence of hsv2 oral infections are overall very low and don't reoccur. Much more likely that the sore throats are a non-std related viral upper respiratory illness.
your sons - not an issue at all! genital herpes is called a sexually transmitted infection because it takes that kind of naked and intimate contact to transmit it. it's not transmitted from routine day to day contact.
do you need tested? yes you do! assume nothing and know for sure who has what.
will you two spread herpes to other body parts by having sex? no you will not.
google the free herpes handbook by Terri Warren too. she's our herpes expert here on medhelp and her free handbook goes over the basics for more details than what I've provided.
keep asking questions!!
grace
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Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
