Yep. Condoms only protect 30% of the time. Some of the latter has to do with the fact that virus can shed outside the original point of entry. For genital herpes, this is anywhere in the "boxer short" region, between waist and mid-thigh, and lower in rare cases. One of my outbreaks, for example, happens near my tailbone.
You're right, he does need to know, at least after the 4 months.
So you can have sex with someone who is positive, WITH a condom, and still get it? even if the condom didn't break or had any holes?
Yes, you can be negative if he's positive. It's not a guarantee that transmission will occur from a positive partner. Shedding doesn't occur every day. According to a 2008 study, HSV-2, for example only sheds on the average about 20% of days, and this is not likely to be constant for 24 hours at a time.
This is up to you, but I do think he needs to know that he could actually be positive and spreading the virus to others. At least after the 4 months, maybe contact him again and tell him to get the Western Blot. Your call.
Yes, if your'e actually negative now and don't have sex, you're certainly "safe." But be aware that condoms/barriers only protect against transmission about 30%.
Can he be positive and I turn out negative?
And if I don't continue as his sexual partner,than shouldn't I be "safe"?
So long as I move forward insisting on protection with future partners or to see their test results before hand?
and I'm gonna wait the 4 months, as painful as they may be for me.
Yes, that is the case, I do not know the status of my current partner. He said he had just got tested before me, but I never asked to see the paper results, which I should have.
I appreciate the descending order of what you think my situation is, I don't want to get to helpful, but as you, I feel like this really is a false positive.
I'm just going to avoid the sex and the discussion because either way, you're right. He is NOT longer term material!
I've just been realizing it from these past few weeks of treatment, since I've been telling him "No" when he wants to have sex. I don't want anything with anyone right now, it's too much with all I have going on.
So I forgot to ask this earlier in the thread, but what is the statistical average of cases, where people test positive, but it turns out to be false?
I'll only add a couple more things - the 4 months has to do with this:
The test looks for antibodies to the virus. These begin to generate when you first contract the virus. That's why the exposure date is the marker to start counting the 4 months.
I'm not sure it's true that you're "safe" if you don't have it. You both need to be tested, because if he's positive, in spite of your potentially being negative now, you're still at risk for contracting the virus at some point in the future.