Aa
Well Im Done
Terri , I appreciate your work. male 48 found out just this week I have HSV2. I am very depressed. Unfortunately this is my thanksgiving.
History
I never noticed anything on myself until monday evening, about 10 blisters popped up suddenly. Had swab test, HSV2 positive. Im on valtrex 1 g 2x daily for 7 days. I was divorced 12 years ago (married 12 years), Had the same live in monogamous girl friend for the next 9 years and recently had a new girlfriend the past three months.
1. Is it likely this is from the most recent girlfriend? (she says she ever has had a problem or aware of any). I know peop can harbor for years but should I notify the others? I will have her get the antigen blood test next week.
2. Could I have harbored this through my other relationships and only now after 20 years have a first breakout?
3. This is pretty significant 10 blisters and inflamed does that typically mean a first breakout?
4. We had sex and slight oral sex (she with me), and kissed a lot two days before this breakout, can I get this stuff in my mouth, on my lips? I have never had a cold sore etc.
5. If she is positive on the blood test, Is there an indication that her infection is new or older than 3 months?
6. If Im infected and she has it too, I obviously would abstain during a breakout like now, but what is the risk if we have unprotected sex other times? Can we infect each other more or can we cause more breakouts with each other? Can we cause the breakout to be more severe?
7. The doc said Valtrex daily would be an option if I have a lot of breakouts. I want to go ahead as preventitive and do it now because of the stress it causes me. Isnt that an OK option?
8. Why isnt the blood work for hsv part of typical womens check-ups? That is absurd! Is the medical community wanting this stuff to spread? I can not imagine how much suffering could be eliminated if there was common screening.
Im at a total loss. Ill never be the same any help you can give me is appreciated.
History
I never noticed anything on myself until monday evening, about 10 blisters popped up suddenly. Had swab test, HSV2 positive. Im on valtrex 1 g 2x daily for 7 days. I was divorced 12 years ago (married 12 years), Had the same live in monogamous girl friend for the next 9 years and recently had a new girlfriend the past three months.
1. Is it likely this is from the most recent girlfriend? (she says she ever has had a problem or aware of any). I know peop can harbor for years but should I notify the others? I will have her get the antigen blood test next week.
2. Could I have harbored this through my other relationships and only now after 20 years have a first breakout?
3. This is pretty significant 10 blisters and inflamed does that typically mean a first breakout?
4. We had sex and slight oral sex (she with me), and kissed a lot two days before this breakout, can I get this stuff in my mouth, on my lips? I have never had a cold sore etc.
5. If she is positive on the blood test, Is there an indication that her infection is new or older than 3 months?
6. If Im infected and she has it too, I obviously would abstain during a breakout like now, but what is the risk if we have unprotected sex other times? Can we infect each other more or can we cause more breakouts with each other? Can we cause the breakout to be more severe?
7. The doc said Valtrex daily would be an option if I have a lot of breakouts. I want to go ahead as preventitive and do it now because of the stress it causes me. Isnt that an OK option?
8. Why isnt the blood work for hsv part of typical womens check-ups? That is absurd! Is the medical community wanting this stuff to spread? I can not imagine how much suffering could be eliminated if there was common screening.
Im at a total loss. Ill never be the same any help you can give me is appreciated.
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
1. Yes, that is most likely, though not for sure. I would advise that past partners, including this one, get IgG antibody testing for HSV 2.
2. That's possible, but not too likely with 10 blisters.
3. Usually
4. Did you have unprotected vaginal intercourse?
5. No, there is no indication of old vs. new if her HSV 2 antibody test is negative.
6. If you're both infected, you can have sex whenever its comfortable for both of you. You can't infect each other "more" nor cause it to be more severe.
7. Yes, daily therapy is certainly an option, particularly if your current partner is NOT infected, then it would be essential! You can go ahead and use it daily if you just want to do it for your own reasons, you don't have to have a certain number of outbreaks .
8. I would agree that it is absurd. My frustration at this situation has gone on for years and years. It is very difficult, I would agree. No one goes through an STD screen at my clinic without herpes testing, unless they specifically decline or tell me they already have herpes. Anything else, in my opinion, is unacceptable.
You're wrong that you won't ever be the same. You will, if you allow yourself to be the same. Do you really think a virus that occurs on your penis infrequently, particularly with daily medicine, will change the essence of who you are? I think not. You are who you are, hold on to that. This is a setback, not a catastrophe unless you decide that it is.
Get your partner tested, I'm putting my money on her being infected and not knowing it. Let me know how it goes, OK?
Terri
2. That's possible, but not too likely with 10 blisters.
3. Usually
4. Did you have unprotected vaginal intercourse?
5. No, there is no indication of old vs. new if her HSV 2 antibody test is negative.
6. If you're both infected, you can have sex whenever its comfortable for both of you. You can't infect each other "more" nor cause it to be more severe.
7. Yes, daily therapy is certainly an option, particularly if your current partner is NOT infected, then it would be essential! You can go ahead and use it daily if you just want to do it for your own reasons, you don't have to have a certain number of outbreaks .
8. I would agree that it is absurd. My frustration at this situation has gone on for years and years. It is very difficult, I would agree. No one goes through an STD screen at my clinic without herpes testing, unless they specifically decline or tell me they already have herpes. Anything else, in my opinion, is unacceptable.
You're wrong that you won't ever be the same. You will, if you allow yourself to be the same. Do you really think a virus that occurs on your penis infrequently, particularly with daily medicine, will change the essence of who you are? I think not. You are who you are, hold on to that. This is a setback, not a catastrophe unless you decide that it is.
Get your partner tested, I'm putting my money on her being infected and not knowing it. Let me know how it goes, OK?
Terri
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
I think that herpes is more difficult for people whose identity is closely tied to their sexuality.
Just for the record, 90% of those infected with HSV 2 don't know they have it, so don't be too hard on her if it turns out she didn't know she had herpes. And also, we aren't sure she's the one, right?
Terri
Just for the record, 90% of those infected with HSV 2 don't know they have it, so don't be too hard on her if it turns out she didn't know she had herpes. And also, we aren't sure she's the one, right?
Terri
Thanks, You must be very dedicated to this cause to work on Thanksgiving. God Bless You
I appreciate your comments. I just feel so helpless. I made it through the 80s when herpes was considered "aids", now nearing 50 and have to deal with this. For reasons prob related to childhood I put a lot of my self worth on sexuality even though I am more than that.
On #4 we were unprotected. I hate the thought of this stuff possibly eating my lips off!
I care for this person but I would be upset to think she knew she had it (if she does). I guess I have to give the ben of doubt that she doesnt know like she said. Ill let you know the outcome of her test.
I appreciate your comments. I just feel so helpless. I made it through the 80s when herpes was considered "aids", now nearing 50 and have to deal with this. For reasons prob related to childhood I put a lot of my self worth on sexuality even though I am more than that.
On #4 we were unprotected. I hate the thought of this stuff possibly eating my lips off!
I care for this person but I would be upset to think she knew she had it (if she does). I guess I have to give the ben of doubt that she doesnt know like she said. Ill let you know the outcome of her test.
You are reading content posted in the Herpes Forum
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
