Hi AJ,
I'm made a horrible mistake and somehow did not even have it come to my mind to tell somebody that I had HSV-2, which is extremely out of character for me... I want to make them feel more at ease about it and I was wondering if you could please give any information as to where you found the actual percentages for the statistics you mentioned if that would be possible.
Thank you so much,
Lindsay
Is herpetic whitlow contagious like regular genital herpes? Or is it contagious when ur outbreaking?
Can i give someone genital herpes be finguring them?
I have genital herpes, can i pass it by kissing?
Thanks once again. I really appreciate the time you are taking to answer my questions. It is GREATLY appreciated!! Greg
Mucous membranes are thinner tissue. Her vagina is a mucous membrane, as is her labia, vulva, perineum, anus, and all the "pink" skin.
Your penis is a mucous membrane, as is your perineum (the little area between your testicles and anus), and anus.
Your mouth, eyes, and inside your nose are too.
Don't let this freak you out. If you had a 99% chance of winning the lottery, you'd play, right? You have a 99% chance of not getting herpes if you use condoms and she is on meds. Even if you decided to ditch the condoms (assuming you both are otherwise std-free), its a 98% chance. Statistically, that's not a significant difference.
AJ
To answer some of your questions--my female partner has type 2 genital herpes, I have never been tested for herpes as far as I know but have never had any symptoms (although I understand that I might have something anyway). We have had intercourse maybe six times--always protected (condoms from start to finish). As I say, she hasn't had an outbreak for many years and faithfully takes antiviral medication. Actually, I don't understand this business about mucous membranes. I understand she has one in her vagina and I have one in my urethra, but if I am wearing a condom, then my urethra is covered so I don't see how we could have mucous membrane to mucous membrane contact. So how would I get infected, even if she is shedding the virus? Sorry to be so dumb about this. Thanks, Greg
Thanks so much for your answer and help on this.
Greg
Does she know what type she has? Have you been tested? You both should get type specific IgG blood tests to find out.
If she has type 2 (you can have genital type 1, but its not as infectious as type 2), and all you did was avoid sex during an outbreak, there is about a 4% chance per year that you'd get herpes from her.
If she took daily suppression OR you use condoms, its 2% per year.
If she took suppression AND you use condoms, its 1%.
(Its a bit higher for positive men who have negative female partners.)
So overall, that's a 96-99% chance that you won't get it. That's better than or equal to getting pregnant on the pill or when using condoms.
There is no guarantee that you won't get it - no zero risk. If you don't think you can handle that, do her a favor and let her find someone who can. You don't need wash after, etc. That won't make a bit of difference.
And how will you avoid mucous membrane contact with her when you have sex? I can't even imagine that, but I think if you try to do some sort of funky position, and get up after to wash, all you are going to do is make her feel bad. I have herpes, and if some guy tried that with me, he wouldn't get another chance, ya know?
I'm sure I sound harsh, but these are questions you need to ask yourself to find out if you really can handle it. If you aren't willing to take a 1% risk, then maybe you can't.
Aj