17 w/ hpv.

[anonymous91]

Today I just found out I have HPV. I'm scared to tell my boyfriend who've I've been dating for five months because we've been using protection, and I was raped a month before I met him. Now I feel gross and dirty and I'm afraid if I have sex it might get worse. So, will it get worse if I continue to have sex with my boyfriend??

[AquaGrl08]

Hi Anonymous91! i totally understand what you are talking about, I was faced this very morning with the fact of telling the man I had sex that I found out about the HPV, to tell you my story short I had only have sex with two man in my life, and most likely i got it from my first and at that moment only guy, have to say I still have a very good friendship with him even though we are not dating any more, so I contacted him to tell him the news, he was somewhat supportive and understanding, so i felt after telling him in someway supported. there is not such thing as a big list to put in aware but still was painful, was shame on it, was fear, and there is lot of feelings mixed. I totally understand what you mean by stop having sex, gosh! i do feel the same way but as a good friend said to me yesterday: you cannot tell how this will help you in the future, i think I read something like that in the above postings. YOu are far younger than me so if theres future for a woman like me it surely is a brighter one for you in store.
My gyn works along with her husband, and I was talking to both since he is major on sexuallity and couples, what he said to me that most of the time couples split when this problems arise, one because the man do not want to "do" his part or do not understand or want to understand what is involved in this issue. he said that he wishes couples were able to live this process together in order to build a stronger relationship, since in its core is deep communication and understanding, but the real stuff is that people fight and live this experiences mostly alone...in my case this is very true since I really do not have a current relationship which I can call supportive or even constructive, yep sound stupid that I accepted this for me but this is my reality check to step out of this foolish behavior.
What I think is either your bf stays with you or not, you are the most important in this issue, as for my i feel this way: no one will ever care more than I do about my health and no one will be more happy being healty than me, so this are times to me to close the net and catch myself and be selfish totally...for my one good you know...
You will be a wiser woman from now on!. and yep there are lots of us around!. thanks God for this forum! Good health to you! ;)

[Wesson30]

If you have the type of hpv that causes warts then it is less likely to be the kind that causes cancer.  That's good news.  As unpleasant as warts are they do go away eventually.  There are a lot of strains of hpv out there and the more of them you get the more likely you are to get cancer.  That's why I suggest you don't delay in getting the vaccine.  You're only 17.  You can't possibly have collected more than a couple of the strains at this point and that is great.  You don't get just one strain of hpv from each infected person you have sex with.  You get ALL the strains that they have plus you still have all the ones you already collected.  With over 100 strains of hpv (only about 30 are sexually transmitted though) there's alot of misery to pick up.  Get the vaccine.  I wish I had had it. As for the red bumps, assume they are warts and get them looked at by a professional.  

[anonymous91]

Thanks for the information it was helpful. Egh it ***** that im going through this s**t, but im glad to know that there are people out there willing to help other cope with these situations. I'm not sure what strain I have yet I took a biopsy two days ago so I have to wait five more days for the results, but lately i've been getting small red bumps that are kinda painful and they dont come often, and im not sure if it is warts or pimples...im too scared to touch it.

[Amanda0922]

Wesson30 is completely right. I know it has nothing to do with your hpv infection, but you truly do not need anyone in your life you can't trust. If you suspect he may be cheating, you probably have reason to. When a good guy comes along who you can trust 100%, you'll know it. A guy who cares about you or values you at all would NEVER cheat under ANY circumstances. There is NO valid excuse for being unfaithful. When a guy cheats, he is saying he really does not care about your well-being. And remember, they are always "sorry." They "messed up" and they'll "never do it again" and all they need is "one more chance." Trust me, I've been there and I have heard all the lines. It's up to you alone to get yourself out of such a situation.

I know you're probably feeling really vulnerable right now and you probably don't want to be alone. But you're going to be fine. This isn't the end. This can be a new beginning for you! Take this opportunity to start making better life decisions. Eat healthy, exercise, don't smoke or drink and help your body clear the virus by building up your immune system. Remember this virus is very common and condoms do not protect you from getting it.

The truth is you're bf could have even given this virus to you. There is no way of determining where you got it from. I know you feel dirty, but remember we are not dirty or promiscuous, we are just unfortunate. You are totally valuable. Give yourself some time, you're gonna be fine :)

Did you get a strain that causes genital warts? Or is it a high-risk strain?

[Wesson30]

You don't need people in your life that you can't trust.  If you can't trust him to be faithful then you can't trust him to keep his mouth shut about anything you tell him.  If this boyfriend is not "Mr. Right" but just "Mr. Right Now" and you can't even be sure he's faithful, then stop the intimacy.  I know that's easier said than done, just talk frankly with him about your belief that you can't trust him.  Let him know that it is not "ok" with you to be having sex with a man who is also having sex with other people.  He'll say anything that he thinks will keep you sexually involved with him. (Even good men do that.) Listen to what he says but TRUST YOUR OWN INSTINCTS.  If you lose a man you can't trust, you really didn't lose anything worth having.  Please, immediately, get that Gardisil vaccine series started.  It will protect you against a whole slew of HPV's you haven't been exposed to yet and could save your life.  Get the whole series and while you're at it get the Hepatitis series too. Will it really hurt you to stop sexually activity for a few months while you complete treatment and get your head around the game plan for the rest of your sexual life?  Give yourself and your body a fresh start.  The decisions you make now will effect not only you but your children.  Haven't even really thought about them yet have you?  She's that 12 year old in the front seat of the car who keeps asking "Mom, are you really sick?" and you wish you could say, "Honey, I'm fine.  The doctors will have me all better in no time, What time does cheerleading practice start?" Instead you're not sure you will see her graduate from high school.   Done that.  Been there.  It *****. He's not worth it.  She is.  You are worth it too.  You have to love yourself more than he loves you.  All that said though, you are young, you are healthy, you CAN get control of this situation.  Good luck!!

[anonymous91]

Thank you for your response. But thats what I'm scared of...because if he is cheating i dont want more different types of hpv...so maybe i should talk to him about it...i dont know how hes going to react, so thats another reason why im scared. I never thought that I would get a virus like so now im afraid to have sex in general.

[Wesson30]

HPV will not get worse if you continue to have sex with the same person you were already having sex with and he doesn't add any outside partners either.  When you start adding outside partners you are at risk for getting everything they (and anyone they slept with) has had.  Go straight to your doctor and talk about getting the Gardisil vaccine.  You may only have 1 HPV virus.  There are many out there.  Don't let yourself get more of them.  You should tell your boyfriend that you want to continue using a condom or other protection until you have had all 3 of the Gardisil vaccines.  Remember you can get HPV through oral sex too.  Be choosey.  You are valuable and worthwhile.  Remember to protect yourself and always treat yourself as precious because you are.