Aa
Riddle for the day!
Hillary, Biden and Obama were on a donkey, at the edge of a cliff.
The donkey got spooked and jumped off the cliff.
Who was saved?
AMERICA
The donkey got spooked and jumped off the cliff.
Who was saved?
AMERICA
Real funny?
It's so predictably inane.
It's so predictably inane.
LOL
Perhaps you would be happier elsewhere.
.He he he
"Rush Limbaugh was arrested at an airport because he had illegal Viagra. So apparently, **** Cheney isn't the only Republican who's locked and loaded." --David Letterman
"What is it with Republicans and Viagra? First Bob Dole, he was doing the ads for Viagra. Now you got Rush Limbaugh. Say what you want about Bill Clinton, but the man was always there to answer the call, ladies and gentlemen" --Jay Leno
"Rush Limp-baugh was detained for more than three hours at the Palm Beach Airport after officials found a bottle of Viagra in his possesion with someone else's name on it. Oooooooooooh. How ironic is that: the one Republican with a plan to get cheap prescription drugs and they try to arrest him." --Jay Leno
"Happy birthday to Rush Limbaugh. He's 55 years old. You have to give Rush credit... He's probably the only Republican in the country with a cheap prescription drug plan." --Jay Leno
"Rush Limbaugh and his third wife has broken up. Apparently, she came home early and found him with their pharmacist." —Jay Leno
"Rush Limbaugh and his wife are divorcing and experts say this could get ugly. I'm confused, are they splitting up or having sex?" —Craig Kilborn
"Rush Limbaugh spoke out on the Iraqi prison pictures situation today. He said it's entirely generated by the media. What? Is this guy on drugs?" —Jay Leno
"Rush Limbaugh is in trouble. Prosecutors say that they have enough evidence to put him away on 10 felony counts. This would be the biggest blow to the conservative movement since Anne Coulter announced she had a penis." —Bill Maher
"Pretty ironic, that the only Republican with a prescription drug plan is Rush Limbaugh. Actually today Rush said he would have no comment on his drug problem until he could figure out a way to blame it on the Clintons." —Jay Leno
"Rush Limbaugh is a drug freak. Apparently, he was able to lose the 'big fat' part but not the 'idiot' part." —Jon Stewart
"Rush Limbaugh is now in rehabilitation and it's going well. It's interesting, one minute you're Rush Limbaugh, great conservative radio talk show host, and the next day you're standing in line with other patients waiting for Darryl Strawberry's autograph." —David Letterman
"After a week of speculation in the press, Rush Limbaugh admitted that he is addicted to pain killers and I'm sorry to say, hoagies. Limbaugh blames his addiction on a botched back operation and lesbians." —Tina Fey
"What is it with Republicans and Viagra? First Bob Dole, he was doing the ads for Viagra. Now you got Rush Limbaugh. Say what you want about Bill Clinton, but the man was always there to answer the call, ladies and gentlemen" --Jay Leno
"Rush Limp-baugh was detained for more than three hours at the Palm Beach Airport after officials found a bottle of Viagra in his possesion with someone else's name on it. Oooooooooooh. How ironic is that: the one Republican with a plan to get cheap prescription drugs and they try to arrest him." --Jay Leno
"Happy birthday to Rush Limbaugh. He's 55 years old. You have to give Rush credit... He's probably the only Republican in the country with a cheap prescription drug plan." --Jay Leno
"Rush Limbaugh and his third wife has broken up. Apparently, she came home early and found him with their pharmacist." —Jay Leno
"Rush Limbaugh and his wife are divorcing and experts say this could get ugly. I'm confused, are they splitting up or having sex?" —Craig Kilborn
"Rush Limbaugh spoke out on the Iraqi prison pictures situation today. He said it's entirely generated by the media. What? Is this guy on drugs?" —Jay Leno
"Rush Limbaugh is in trouble. Prosecutors say that they have enough evidence to put him away on 10 felony counts. This would be the biggest blow to the conservative movement since Anne Coulter announced she had a penis." —Bill Maher
"Pretty ironic, that the only Republican with a prescription drug plan is Rush Limbaugh. Actually today Rush said he would have no comment on his drug problem until he could figure out a way to blame it on the Clintons." —Jay Leno
"Rush Limbaugh is a drug freak. Apparently, he was able to lose the 'big fat' part but not the 'idiot' part." —Jon Stewart
"Rush Limbaugh is now in rehabilitation and it's going well. It's interesting, one minute you're Rush Limbaugh, great conservative radio talk show host, and the next day you're standing in line with other patients waiting for Darryl Strawberry's autograph." —David Letterman
"After a week of speculation in the press, Rush Limbaugh admitted that he is addicted to pain killers and I'm sorry to say, hoagies. Limbaugh blames his addiction on a botched back operation and lesbians." —Tina Fey
So you worship Obama and are a liberal that can't take a joke. Real nice.
David Letterman: "Here's what we know about Ann Coulter. She's blonde, she's single, and well, maybe someone will set her up with O.J."
Letterman: "Abu Musab Al-Zarqawi was the world's most unhinged lunatic. He's now dead. So that moves Ann Coulter up to first place."
Jay Leno: "Donald Rumsfeld said Al-Zarqawi was mean, vicious and hateful. So you know what that means? Ann Coulter could be next."
Leno: "Yesterday was 666. ... And the devil did not show up yesterday, unless of course you're a Democrat watching Ann Coulter on the Today Show."
Letterman: "Abu Musab Al-Zarqawi was the world's most unhinged lunatic. He's now dead. So that moves Ann Coulter up to first place."
Jay Leno: "Donald Rumsfeld said Al-Zarqawi was mean, vicious and hateful. So you know what that means? Ann Coulter could be next."
Leno: "Yesterday was 666. ... And the devil did not show up yesterday, unless of course you're a Democrat watching Ann Coulter on the Today Show."
What do you get when you cross Obama with America???
A Depression.
A Depression.
Well, I thought your post was funny...some people just can't take a joke...
Looks like this post may start getting "nasty"...
Looks like this post may start getting "nasty"...
Yep I noticed that. I just thought it was funny. Doesn't mean I like or dislike anyone. Matter of fact I voted for Hillary in the beginning and I am registered as a democrat. I just like jokes and thought others might find it funny as well.
I am a Conservative and like to poke fun at liberals who can't take jokes on Obama but probably did it the entire time on Bush.
It's all in good fun.
It's all in good fun.
"McCain kept talking about how he could help this man. If McCain really wants to help this guy, you now what he should do? Just have him re-pipe all of McCain's houses. That would be a job for life." --Jay Leno, on Joe the Plumber
A woman at a John McCain rally said that Barack Obama is an Arab. And McCain quickly corrected her. It was really awkward, because McCain had to tell her, 'Look, Governor Palin, you are wrong.'" --Jay Leno
"Barack Obama, what a guy. He is actually going door to door, knocking on doors in a neighborhood, asking people if they'll vote for him. Coincidentally, John McCain is also going door to door, except when he knocks on a door, he says, 'Do I live here?'" --David Letterman
"Sarah Palin had to have her campaign bus make an unscheduled stop at a Wal-Mart in Ohio, so she could pick up a package of diapers. I guess she ran out of diapers, so they pulled over and she went in and everyone followed her. Which is kind of cute, but it turned out Senator McCain didn't need them." --Jimmy Kimmel
"Did you watch the debate last night? I gave up drinking a while ago, but I started again. And I'm watching the debate last night, and I did a shot every time John McCain said, 'My friends.' And so I am just blotto." --David Letterman
"At one point McCain referred to Barack Obama as 'That One.' And McCain later thought maybe something had gone haywire. He apologized, he said he got confused, he thought he was at the bakery." –David Letterman
A woman at a John McCain rally said that Barack Obama is an Arab. And McCain quickly corrected her. It was really awkward, because McCain had to tell her, 'Look, Governor Palin, you are wrong.'" --Jay Leno
"Barack Obama, what a guy. He is actually going door to door, knocking on doors in a neighborhood, asking people if they'll vote for him. Coincidentally, John McCain is also going door to door, except when he knocks on a door, he says, 'Do I live here?'" --David Letterman
"Sarah Palin had to have her campaign bus make an unscheduled stop at a Wal-Mart in Ohio, so she could pick up a package of diapers. I guess she ran out of diapers, so they pulled over and she went in and everyone followed her. Which is kind of cute, but it turned out Senator McCain didn't need them." --Jimmy Kimmel
"Did you watch the debate last night? I gave up drinking a while ago, but I started again. And I'm watching the debate last night, and I did a shot every time John McCain said, 'My friends.' And so I am just blotto." --David Letterman
"At one point McCain referred to Barack Obama as 'That One.' And McCain later thought maybe something had gone haywire. He apologized, he said he got confused, he thought he was at the bakery." –David Letterman
oh come on wheres you sense of humor,, Bush had a ton of jokes made of him, I laughed and like lonelymom I am a registered Democrat....well I was.... if all continues the way it has started.
I agree with you margypops. I may end up registering as a republican next go around if all continues the way we are heading.
Ahhhhhh
Come on, when BUSH was in office, he started out with two guys named **** and COLON.....Now you tell me someone wasn't going to get fked.... George Carlin (r.i.p.)
George W. Bush and a secret service agent are taking a stroll when they come upon a little girl carrying a basket with a blanket over it. Curious, Bush asks the girl, "What's in the basket?"
She replies, "New baby kittens," and she opens the basket to show him.
"How nice," says Bush. "What kind are they?"
The little girl says, "Republicans."
Bush smiles, pats the little girl on the head and continues on.
Three weeks later, Bush is taking another stroll, this time with Karl Rove. They see the little girl again with the same basket. Bush says, "Watch this, Karl, It's really cute." They approach the little girl.
Bush greets her and asks how the kittens are doing, and she says, "Fine." Then, smirking, he nudges Rove with his elbow and asks the little girl, "And can you tell us what kind of kittens they are?"
She replies, "Democrats."
Aghast, Bush says, "But three weeks ago you said they were Republicans!"
"I know," she says. "But now their eyes are open."
She replies, "New baby kittens," and she opens the basket to show him.
"How nice," says Bush. "What kind are they?"
The little girl says, "Republicans."
Bush smiles, pats the little girl on the head and continues on.
Three weeks later, Bush is taking another stroll, this time with Karl Rove. They see the little girl again with the same basket. Bush says, "Watch this, Karl, It's really cute." They approach the little girl.
Bush greets her and asks how the kittens are doing, and she says, "Fine." Then, smirking, he nudges Rove with his elbow and asks the little girl, "And can you tell us what kind of kittens they are?"
She replies, "Democrats."
Aghast, Bush says, "But three weeks ago you said they were Republicans!"
"I know," she says. "But now their eyes are open."
Okay, I have to say I'm republican but, that is just hilarious!!
Republican Beliefs
Things you have to believe to be a Republican today:
Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him, and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.
Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.
The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.
A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.
Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.
The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.
If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.
A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our long-time allies, then demand their cooperation and money.
Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy. Providing health care to all Americans is socialism.
HMOs and insurance companies have the best interests of the public at heart.
Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.
A president lying about an extramarital affair is a impeachable offense. A president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.
Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.
The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's drunk driving record and cocaine arrest are none of our business.
Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness, and you need our prayers for your recovery.
You support states' rights, which means Attorney General John Ashcroft can tell states what local voter initiatives they have the right to adopt.
Clinton's business interests in the 1970s in which he lost money are of vital national interest, but Bush's activities in the 1980s in which he made money under questionable circumstances is un-important.
hahaha
he he he the kitty one was funny...who ever we vote for. .
Things you have to believe to be a liberal.
Obama is the second coming.
It's nice how you throw lies into your little rant, but would expect nothing more from a liberal who is scared of real debate.
Obama is the second coming.
It's nice how you throw lies into your little rant, but would expect nothing more from a liberal who is scared of real debate.
Real debate? You and I? What a silly notion!
You've yet to display the requisite erudition, imagination or eloquence to engage in a debate with me. Do you know the term "ad hominem"? You need considerably more than that.
Mike
You've yet to display the requisite erudition, imagination or eloquence to engage in a debate with me. Do you know the term "ad hominem"? You need considerably more than that.
Mike
You have posted jokes from other people, guess that shows how intelligent you are.
Just face the facts you would never debate an issue with a real conservative because you would lose.
If you are not scared choose a topic and start. Or will your excuse be, "I don't have time for this" or maybe, "I would never lower myself to debating someone of less intellience". Trust me I have heard them all before and when a man or woman does step up and actually engage in a debate about the issues, within a couple of minutes they resort to name called because they got beat.
I know the liberal playbook like it's the back of my hand. Liberals are easier to read then a Dr. Suess book.
Just face the facts you would never debate an issue with a real conservative because you would lose.
If you are not scared choose a topic and start. Or will your excuse be, "I don't have time for this" or maybe, "I would never lower myself to debating someone of less intellience". Trust me I have heard them all before and when a man or woman does step up and actually engage in a debate about the issues, within a couple of minutes they resort to name called because they got beat.
I know the liberal playbook like it's the back of my hand. Liberals are easier to read then a Dr. Suess book.
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