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21 and my testicles are shrinking, yet the doctors say my testosterone ...
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21 and my testicles are shrinking, yet the doctors say my testosterone is normal? please help :'(

Sometime last year in 2009, I started noticing a bulge above my left testicle. I also started getting pain in my right testicle, which could be tenderness in either the left or right, or soreness in the groin area. Sometimes, the cords connecting the testicles would feel tender and kind of sore. At first I thought it was a varicocele, to which one urologist diagnosed it as, after an ultrasound, it was determined to be a small epididymal cyst. However, during this time, I noticed that I felt as if my testicles had begun to shrink. My right testicle was undescended and I had this corrected at age 10 so it has always been smaller than the left. Since June, they clearly have shrunk a good amount, I'm positive now. I saw the urologist who performed my surgery when I was 10 and he tried to convince me it was psychological and in my head, which angered me. After 9 months I am positive they have shrunk. I have also noticed that the PC muscle underneath has shrunk as well and seems to have weakened. It used to protrude a good amount and always felt fairly firm, even without erection. Now it feels tender and not smooth, maybe even torn. It has receded and that area just has a lot of loose skin now. If i flex it, it goes firm but immediately goes soft like it is fatiguing and I have no control over it. My erections have become weaker and the girth of my penis has become smaller as well. My penis when flaccid seems tight and much smaller as well. When I had sexual activity, I started having spasms or contractions of my PC muscle and it kind of hurt, not like normal. I'll also admit that I am probably addicted to masturbation since I've been 14 and in the last few years I have been smoking marijuana during it as well. Since January 2009 though, I have quit marijuana cold turkey.

I had blood work done on my testosterone, and they told me my levels were normal and that it was 1000. I'm not sure if this was free or whatever testosterone it was, but I'm only 5'4 and 115 lbs, and 1000 just seemed really high for me to be feeling and having symptoms like this. Could it be possible somehow that through stress and depression (I've had for years), or perhaps a poor diet, that my body has too much testosterone and the testicles are not producing it anymore? I have also been constipated since December, and I go very sporadically now. I have never had something like this in my entire life. I struggle very intensely to have a movement and even when it has been soft (almost like diarhea (diarrhea)) something has still felt wrong about how hard I've had to push. Could this be because my PC muscle has become so weak that I don't have enough strength to push? Could the constipation be connected to the testicle/pc muscle issue if so?

One last thing. I've noticed that after some sessions of masturbation, often long ones, I have to urinate after and my urine has been cloudy. My semen is usually semi-clear and not very white when this happens. I tested by urinating into a bottle and when the cloudiness settled, I determined the majority of my sperm was in there, so I've come to the conclusion i have retrograde ejaculation. Diabetes runs in my family, but when I had blood work done, they told me all my levels were normal. I also want to add that during the midst of this shrinking issue, I had bouts where I was urinating very often but in smaller amounts. Since then, the situation seems to have gotten better, but I'm not sure because I might have become used to how often I urinate now.

I'm sorry for this being so long, but the bottom line is that my testicles have shrunk a good amount, as well as my PC muscle from what I can tell, yet my testosterone levels are "normal", even possibly high. How is this so? The doctors have all blown me off and said there's nothing to be worried about, but it's my body and this has been a significant change. Could it be prostate related? A precursor to some condition or disease I'm developing? I'm only 21 and these body changes are affecting my mind and my confidence. Also, since early June, I have been sleeping extremely poorly and even when I'm very tired I can't fall asleep until 4-5am every night, sometimes even 7am. This is likely due to my anxiety/depression thinking about this matter but I feel like there is a physical change that is out of my control. Could all of these things possibly be related to some matter the doctors haven't identified yet? I feel like I'm dying or degrading and no one has been able to give me an answer, and it is extremely scary.
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