Basically I'll organize two lists of my symptoms and what I've ruled out.
Symptoms:
1) Constantly feeling as though I'm not present, like I'm dreaming or sleepwalking. Very surreal and frightening.
2) Constant fatigue/exhausted. General feeling of crappiness. Malaise?
3) Sometimes a constant, but vague headache. Achy and pounding, slightly.
4) My boyfriend pokes fun at me for walking in zig zags :P
5) It's weird, from my peripheral vision (sp?) I sometimes see different colors. I was looking at the whiteboard in class and my assignment was pink, for example. Not often.
6) Sometimes it's as if I'm looking into a petri dish under a microscope. Little moving things squirming around. Not often, it was really awful one day during dance class and I sat down. BOOM, little organisms everywhere.
7) Depression, caused by the fog. I don't need a psychiatrist, I'll stick to that.
8) It's hard to focus. You know the weird VISION fog that happens when you zone out? Where things move around until you focus again? It's like that a lot, but no, the brain fog is not a vision problem.
9) Sometimes I'll get up, not even quickly, and get a headrush
10) This rarely happens, but I'll put it up anyways. My ear will randomly mute and ring until it gradually comes back to full hearing capability.
11) I have no idea if this is correlated. I get random growths behind my ear, which I thought was from inflammation. I have one right now, though, I'm in remission, so that can't be it. It's getting wider, like covering more surface area, it's tender and hard. It's not a zit, just thought I'd clear that up.
The problem is, my symptoms are vague. The only thing that's constant is number one, except it can get worse, I don't know how. I just sink further into a trance.
What I've ruled out:
1) Crohns. My doctor told me that I'm in remission, well, awesome. But the fog is the same.
2) Anemia. My hemogloben is perfectly fine, it's at a 12
3) Thyroid (blood test)
4) Hyper/hypoglycemia (blood test)
5) Gluten intolerance
6) Lactose Intolerance
7) Scheduling (stress) I have it when I'm extremely busy, and I have it when I'm laying low during summer vacation
8) Certain medications: Prednisone, Cipro, Birth Control (Acne med), Entocort, Anti-depressant, Biologics
9) Depression - Anti-depressant did nothing
10) Malnutrition
So now, my little story.
I can't remember exactly when the fog started, but I know it was before my diagnosis and medication souffle. When I was diagnosed, I blamed it on Crohn's. When I seemed to be getting better, I blamed it on Predisone. Then, stress. Then I relapsed - must be Crohn's again. I was put on Remicade and went into remission, but the fog was still there. So not I researched my medications, I convinced my doctors to get me off of Cipro, ortho tri-cyclene, and now Entocort, which I'm almost done tapering off of with no relief whatsoever. Problem is, when my dermatologist took me off of the birth control, he put me on Solodyn, an antibiotic. Antibiotics can cause this, I read. Really, the only other thing I could do is go to a neurologist, but because I'm not in physical PAIN, it will do no good, I'm sure.
Now, my question:
Do I let it go? Do I live with it and try my best to forget about it? It affects me, all I want to do is wake up. That's it. I want to wake up and see my boyfriend, my family, my friends. I want to experience everything fully, not in this half-awake state. I can't find any reason for it. Am I just digging myself into a hole, should I stop researching and pursuing this?
I feel guilty because so many of you are incredibly ill. Here I am in remission, with a different problem, but it's not life threatening, which persuades me to come to a closure on my research.
What do you think? I need guidence.