pain addiction

[snortking0308]

not a Q?... everyone seems to be on here with there pain med addictions...
im not discriminateing anyone. im a pain addict also. ive been doing pain pills for eh 2003 to present after
my step dad called me and told me he loved me and then shot himself. hard time. i didnt know where to goto
who to turn to.
drugs... they was there. and i didnt give a **** at that point in time.
when you go threw your dare class. in school they tell you drugs lead to bigger things. i always thought it was a bunch off bull shiii but now i have a diff look on it. i started smokeing pot. moved to achole ... then to pain pills.
im sher ive done worse things.?
and im in these shoes rite now.
i wish ive listend but there was no one there for me. atleast i though and since ive been on pain pills i dont have a life. im like what is said alot. "Zombie Mode" body aches when it's not around cant sleep...
ive quite pain pills befor i moved to the cut with my dad. no one around for miles no car to drive no phone to use.
i was proud of myself. 2mths clean. i thought i was cured.
everyone says the detox goes away in a couple of weeks it's a lie. your going to deal with it the rest of your life.
shiii i went 2months. without nothing. cold turkey. and it was hard. exsp. in front of my dad. i had to hide my symptoms..
anyways..
i came home. to my town. wich i should have never done.
it's nothing but pill heads around here. allllll teens these days. i mean young young ones if that.
i got around the wrong people got drunk and it happened. i ******* regret it every day.
....:::::SOOOO::::::.....
from here on im quiteing it.
for good.
i honestly miss my family. it makes me so mad and sorry for doing this to them.
and doing this to me.
at times i honestly feel like crying....
and im known as a tuff guy. but im sick of being that tuff guy anymore. im breaking down
fisicly and mentaly
I WANT MY LIFE BACK!!!!!!
im tearing up at this momment. i havent had a easy going life.
tossed around i dont want him you take him. the "Youngest"
yah...
so im in this for me. and only me buttt
the one reason i realllllllllllllllyyyy want to do this. see i have one of the bestest brother only brother
anyone can ask for. we used to be so ******* close. went every where with each other. like "Twins" lol
i see him doing his thing living his life. a "Great" one i must say he has the perfect girl there just alike both silly and hyper. and always making sum1 laugh. they have been dateing for like a yr. and check this out.
i know it's going to be hard to belive. but they have honestly been in no fights/arguments what so ever...
and the life he's living. working full time. and when he's not he's doing side jobs for extra cash for petty $ for him and his girl. Training in the MMA pluss weight lifting rideing bikes.horses. the out door fun stuff.... what life is like without drugs in it. and honestly it looks way better than the road im going down.... what im trying to say sence i keep running on and on and jumpin around... sorry =[  
is that i see the life he has. and i want that kind of life.
not haveing to worry about getting my fix. "pill's"  =p
and to acctualy have somthing that i can say is mine. and "I" baught it..
live on my own for once. and grow the fu*k up. 20yrs old and i have nothing but a car. i cant even restore cuz im to busy on getting high..... i can honestly see my life fadeing away from me and the future if i keep this up im just
i hate to say it but it's the truth im going to end up killing myself over a pill. either from overdose liver disease or sumthin......
and it's not worth it. so dont do this to yourself anymore if your in my shoes just give what im doing a try see if it works for you as i hope for me.
drugs arent everything. life & loved one's are more important trust me.
but anyways..
i will keep u updated =]=]=]

[Tuckamore]

WONDERFUL. You should be proud of yourself because I know it takes a lot of very hard work and commitment. And I have heard it is one day at a time.

Six days! Just great! I am so glad that you stopped in to let us know how you are doing. I will look forward to hearing how you are doing. I hope the Substance Abuse Forum has been helpful for you.

I know you have a ways to go but remember to use all your resources and I know you will make it. You have made me smile with happiness for you. Again thank you for sharing and please keep in touch.
Hang in there, Tuck.

[Tuckamore]

WONDERFUL. You should be proud of yourself because I know it takes a lot of very hard work and commitment. And I have heard it is one day at a time.

Six days! Just great! I am so glad that you stopped in to let us know how you are doing. I will look forward to hearing how you are doing. I hope the Substance Abuse Forum has been helpful for you.

I know you have a ways to go but remember to use all your resources and I know you will make it. You have made me smile with happiness for you. Again thank you for sharing and please keep in touch.
Hang in there, Tuck.

[snortking0308]

almost 6 days. =]

[Tuckamore]

That's perfectly ok. I am just very glad that you have made the decision to get straight. That is more than half the battle. Please do join our Substance Abuse Forum.

Again Best of Luck,
Tuck

[snortking0308]

then i think i posted in the wrong forum. haha

[Tuckamore]

Hi SnortKing,

I am very sorry to hear about all your struggles with addictive substances. But I am a bit confused. You began your post with, "everyone seems to be on here with there pain med addictions... im not discriminateing anyone. im a pain addict also." Do you mean you have chronic pain or that you have addiction problems with pain medications?

Please understand that you are on the Pain Management Forum. Our members suffer with chronic pain, many of us are disabled and struggling to function with the pain and live as normal of a life as we can. We are not "addicts" in the true sense of the word. We are dependant upon legally prescribed pain medications to reduce or pain. Because we have true pain we do not get "high" or "buzzed" on our pain medications. Indeed none of us want to take these pain narcotics.

I appreciate your honestly. It sounds like you have a wonderful brother that is leading by example. I think you have the strength to kick your addiction habit(s) but you'll need lots of support and understanding. You have chosen the wrong forum to place your post. We have an excellent substance abuse forum and the members there can relate to you and your issues much better than our members at the Pain Management Forum. They are kind and supportive ppl that will guide you in your search for sobriety. I encourage you to post on that forum. Go to the top of the page and click on forums. Scroll down until you come to Substance Abuse and click on that.

Good luck to you. I know you can make it. Just make wise choices and get that support. Life is tough enough without having an addiction on your back.
Take care, Tuck

[jollyman069]

sorry to hear about your bad times...but i think you have to learn the difference between addiction and someone such as myself and many others here at this forum are phsically dependent not addicted. yes we take pain meds everydat to help us have a normal life...but we take them as the doctor ordered we dont take more then we are suppost too. Us that have been on pain meds for legtimate pain are not getting high from them ogetting a buzz from them.. they do not work on us that way..we are taking these meds not out wanting or craving..but if we didnt take them the quality of life would be horrible.. so everyone taking pain meds are not addicts.. so please make sure you are not sterotypoing people just because they are taking certin meds ..thanks and good luck to you