The day got even better before I left work

[maybebaby29]

As you saw, yesterday was a @$# day for me.

1. diagnosis of subchorionic bleeding
2. nurse run-in at the OB
3. before I left work the OB called back and said "did you ever get your follow up mam?" I told her no because no one called to follow up, there was constant miscommunication between her office and the other hospital that took it, and honestly, with the infertility treatment starting soon after, I kind of let it slip. Not that it wasn't important or on my mind, just happened and I got pregnant fast so now I can't get a mam.

Originally the hospital said they did find microcalcifications, which isn't good. But it doesn't mean cancer. The on staff radiologist however was a friggen non-communicative moron. She just said "yea you got scatters and come back". Any question I asked her she didn't really answer. I got mad and I think that played into me letting it go.

Well the OB said that the report showed a concerning area amongst the scatter. Scatter = concern with followup but don't freak out. Concerning area of concentration microcalcifications means = higher concern, check asap and possible biopsy.

Well seeing I'm 8 weeks pregnant, I can't go for a mammogram and right now, I don't need to hear "concerned concentration" and what gets me mad is the stupid radiologist on staff never said that. If she did, I would have ran the next day (well actually I did but the miscommunication was on going). On top of which, the hospital wrote that my primary care doc wrote the script so they keep sending all results to him. He NEVER wrote it, the OB did and she never gets the results.

I'm livid and scared. The biopsy isn't fun (multiple core needles jabbed in the boob to extract samples) and the news will kill me if it's bad. I don't want to make a choice of treatment or the baby.

I'm trying so hard to stay grounded and not overreact and enjoy the fact that we saw the heartbeat yesterday. :) It was magical. But why, why, why can't this pregancy have very slight complications and move on?! Not terms like "bleeding" and "cancer concern"? I'm so mad right now about things. And I feel guilty because I don't want the baby to get stressed or send negative vibes. I keep talking to the baby saying it will be ok and it's not their fault and they better not go anywhere on me because they're absolutely adorable.

[maybebaby29]

Thank you. Trust me, when I found out it was ok, I was sooo happy. I mean, jumping for joy, telling everyone the news happy. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers (everyone).

[lhughes]

Celebrate!!!  Good news, even if it is delayed and made you anxious!!!

I'm so very glad you are not going to have to deal with this ugly disease.  I hope the rest of your pregnancy is very uneventful and calm.

Best of luck to you and your little one to be.
Lisa

[carpediemforlife]

Friend all will be well....prayer and guidence is what you need most.....keep us posted.

[maybebaby29]

It was for not. The doc never got the 2nd report which said Im' fine. Grrr. ANOTHER mistake by the office. After June's visit to the OB, if all doesn't go perfect, then I'm switching OBs. I'm tired of getting scared for nothing. Thanks for asking and caring.

[lhughes]

You just do what you have to do for the pregnancy, for the baby, and for yourself.  Sometimes it's a hard decision, but others are not.  When I found out I had cancer, it was an easy decision.  Finding out you have cancer AFTER being pregnant, even for a couple of weeks, is very upsetting, but as I found out, other women have done it and survived quite nicely.  Some women have had difficulties, but are still trying to find their cure.... when a baby is as wanted as I know you want yours, you will go to the ends of the earth to do what you can to help the pregnancy and the baby succeed.  Find out you are pregnant after cancer.... I've talked to someone who's faced that, and frankly it is an entirely different story.  You do what you have to do sometimes.  And for me, that was demanding that the pregnancy go forward and the cancer treated around it.  It worked for me.... my friend in B'ham is still struggling with her cure, but I hear is getting better now with the new treatment.  

Let me know what they say.  I do hope this is all for naught...and just one more thing to worry over.  Do try not to stress too much.  I walked every day to help calm me and clear my head.  Don't over think this stuff...ok, that's like saying "don't breathe"... just think that whatever happens you can and will survive and you can have this child (God willing and the creek don't rise...as they say around here.)

Take care,
Lisa

[Helen72]

This is all very frustrating and nerve wracking.  I hope that everything is OK and simply some changes are taking place in your body to prepare for the baby and these changes threw the hospital people off.  Hang in there!!!  This first trimester drama is going to end at some point, right???
(hug)

[maybebaby29]

Thanks and love the Dr. joke. hahahah

Just called the primary care physician and he said he never got the report. The hospital is the one who said that they were sending stuff to him.

AGGGHHHH STUPID PEOPLE.

[adgal]

I'm alot like you describe yourself, I worry about everything...and usually its nothing, know what I mean.  But when I hear stories like yours and others I have read, it just makes me realize how we so need to take control of our own health care.  I mean, screw ups seem to happen so often.  I went to my regular dr. cause I have tendonitis in my right arm. What does the idiot do?  Sends me for an x-ray and prescribes muscle relaxants...its like..hello, I'm pregnant!!!  My favorite saying these days is "what do you call a Dr. that got all c's and d's in med school??  Answer: A Dr."

I am so sorry you are going through so much right now.  First trimester is scary enough when nothing else is coming at you.  It will be nothing I am sure, and if it is, as lhughes said, its not the end.  They can do all sorts of things now without harming the baby.  Its good your getting it checked out, always better to be safe.  But more often than not with these things, all is well.  Hang is there, your going to be just fine.

[maybebaby29]

Oh I know and still don't know how you did it. Thank you for the prayer. I'm an overly nervous/paranoid person when it comes to doctors even hinting about things like that so I know that my freakout is self induced.

Thanks again.

[lhughes]

Even if it's bad news, you are far enough along that all can be well for you and the baby!!!

Please try to not freak out ... remember I've been there, if need be, you can do this too!

I'll say a prayer for you that all is well.
Lisa

[maybebaby29]

See that's just it. U of Chicago has been great all along and usually Northwestern has been the jack@sses in my life when it comes to speciality care (NW originally told me that I'm 35, and I'm not at age for cancer. Helloooo stupid statement).

But now, it's U of Chicago with the mamm's screwing this up. I am calling a nurse supervisor or something because this is bull to the @#$#.

Thanks. I'm going to be ok and it's not like OMG I HAVE CANCER. I won't think that way. It's just like wtf, stop scaring me with all this people. My mom has stage IV cancer (adopted so no, there is no relation of concern) and my dad has lot of health issues lately, this family needs some good news and with me telling them I'm pregnant, we wanted things to turn around for us, not "I'm pregnant but xyz is going on too". They can't take it.

[Dee1003]

I feel so bad for you.  I had a biopsy and it's not too bad.  Try not to worry a lot of times they see things like this and it ends up to be nothing like calcium deposits or something like that.  Where are you located, what hospital is this tha keeps messing everything up.  

I will keep you in my thoughts.  Please keep us all informed.