Fears

[AJPmommy]

I am 36 and am approximately 6 weeks pregnant. I continue to have fears about miscarriage. I worry about every little twinge and pain, etc. This is my first pregnancy and it took about 10 months for us to conceive. I've been trying to keep my fears to myself and not let it interrupt my daily routine. My OB does not do ultrasounds before 8 weeks and ours is scheduled for 12/8, the soonest I could have one. I'm so worried something is wrong. I want to stop being preoccupied with these thoughts. Any advice?

[pangel74]

I am in your same position. I'm 37 and this is my first pregnancy. Ever!  I've heard so many stories about how it's likely to lose the first one. Luckily I have a supportive caring partner who is trying to make my life as stress free and happy as possible. Thank God for him. Just keep doing all of the things you know you should for the baby and be happy. It is a blessing to be pregnant!

[AJPmommy]

Thank you relle22 for your kind words. I'm 7 weeks today. Ultra sound next week. I'm both looking forward to it and dreading it.

[relle22]

I can totally understand I am 8 weeks pregnant and are scared of another misscarriage I had one in June at around same time. It does your head in as you just want to get to 12 weeks. Every day just drags and everything you feel inside you stress and analyse. I'm seeing my ob next friday and i pray that its all ok . All the best with your pregnancy hope all goes well. :)

[rosie7170]

There is probably nothing anyone can say or do to stop your worrying.  I've always believed that if it's meant to be then it will!! I had 2 m/c's in the past and then a beautiful little girl and am now trying for #2 and do not want to give up even if I was to have another m/c (hopefully not coz I am now just turned 40 so time is really running out!!)  Your age will not be an issue at all if something was to happen.  I was 36 when I conceived my DD and, like I said, I am now 40 and trying for #2.  If your OB will not do an u/s then maybe you can ask him to do blood tests to check your HCG levels every couple of days.  If they are rising every couple of days, then it's a really good sign!! Good luck!!

[AJPmommy]

Thank you for all your kind words. I can't wait for next week's ultrasound. I just want baby to be healthy.

[Jennie1211]

I totally understand how you feel. I was the exact same way, and like you, this is my first pregnancy. It took us about 2+ years to finally conceive via IVF at 39, so I certainly know what the stress feels like. In my case, I tried to stay off the Internet unless it was to consult forums that were supportive and positive (and I still do for my own peace of mind). I spent a lot of time and energy in the beginning reading, believing, and obsessing over every scary statistic out there--all this did was stress me out even more and make me almost have panic attacks in the middle of the night. Limiting my Internet stalking time helped quite a bit, though, especially during the first trimester. I also made a concerted effort to stay as busy as possible with my most positive and supportive friends who I specifically asked to help me avoid obsessing. As soon as I would start, they would shut me down. I can't say I was always entirely successful, but that helped me. What you are feeling is certainly normal, though :)

[JourneyJoJo]

FYI, 36 is still young.  I delivered my first at 42 and will deliver my second at 44!

[JourneyJoJo]

The first twelve weeks are especially scary and you are not alone in your fears.  Yes, your OB is waiting to do the u/s, but they often can't find the heartbeat until 7/8 weeks anyways, so when you see your baby for the first time, it will be tiny, but they should be able to find the heartbeat, the first of many milestones.

What helped me through my pregnancies was being thankful for the baby within for as long as it was going to be with me, be it 6 weeks or 60 years.  It was hard, but when I started to worry, I would let myself worry for a few minutes and then I would turn it around.  It sounds corny, but I would sort of meditate and imagine a white light surrounding my little one, keeping it safe and sound and showering it with love no matter what happened.  It made me feel very connected to the baby.

All of those twinges and pains are probably the baby and the uterus growing!  Just wait for the round ligament pain -- ouch!  One roll over to the other side or a big cough then whammo!  Ah, the joys of pregnancy.

Best of luck!

[wife_1st]

No advice but I understand your fear. I'm 38 just shy of 6 weeks and I am feeling the same way