Could the lube I used be linked to my m/c ?

[sue68]

Hi All,

It has been a thought that's been on my mind for a while and I can't help but wonder if the lubricant we used ( Durex , sometimes KY ) had anything to due with the m/c.  Could it have caused some changes to chromosomes or to the sperm which ended with our loss ?  Its hard not to go back and rehash what I could've done or what I did - the espressos I drank before I knew, the sushi....etc...etc....I know, I got to put all this to rest and start fresh but, sometimes these things creep up into my thoughts.  

[sue68]

Thanks Amanda,

These "coulda woulda shoulda " thoughts keep coming up and driving me crazy.  I also worry it will take me as long to get pg again or , if I do, only to m/c again.  I'm aware that quite a few women here have had multiple m/c's and they ( you included ) are really strong women to go through that. I really admire that 'cause I feel like a real weak wimp sometimes. I'm so terrified of going through another m/c but, you told me back then that the drive to have a baby keeps you going and so that is what keeps me hanging on. I've got to remember that you women made it this far : some got pregnant, some showing progress with new info and all not losing hope - I have to prod myself to stay positive.

I know I should get some blood tests done and quiet those fears - I'm just stalling -  soon I will take a deep breath then take that leap and make that appointment. I have a supportive DH but, I'm glad that I have you and the others here to "hold my hand"  - thanks so much !  

[adgal]

Hey Sue,

I have driven myself crazy thinking back on everything I did or didn't do that could have caused me to m/c. It's normal to do that, but the reality is it is highly highly unlikely.  A healthy fetus is almost impossible to miscarry.  There are women that do things intentionally to try, and most are unsuccesful.  Don't beat yourself up about waiting this long either...you have lived your life in a way that was best for you!  We all are ready for children and have them at the right time in our lives.  Yes, its a bit tougher now, but still  doable.  

There is nothing you could have done differently.  Make that appointment and then move forward.  Your chances of miscarrying a second time are absolutely no higher then they were the first time.  I know, I am scared too, but we can do this girlfriend!!!!!  Hang in there.

[sue68]

Thanks for your responses - its been on my mind since the doctor told me I was going to m/c Oct 6th.  Its hard not to think I could've done something to prevent it - get more sleep,  exercising too much, certain foods I ate, etc...The only thing I really kick myself for is waiting so long to ttc. I had planned to go back to the doctor for a follow up after I m/c'd naturally but, I didn't do that yet. I admit I'm terrified of finding out that I won't be able to get pg or carry any baby to term - that scares me beyond belief.  However, its been on my mind lately to go get some bloodwork done and check all my hormones etc.... yeah, I've been thinking about that alot lately and I know if I get it done - I might just find some positive news instead.....
Right now though, I feel I've got some hope because I did get pregnant on my own and I've read that the next pg's have better chances.  I don't want to lose that hope - its what keeps me going.  Does this make sense ?  I know that I should go make an appointment - and I'm working up the courage to do it.

[YvetteY]

Hello...none of the things you did caused your miscarriage.  Miscarriages are very common and in general early miscarriages are due to chromosome anomolies.  Nothing you can do.  Your age is also a big factor.  If you are over 35 you have a very good chance of miscarrying because of the age of your eggs.

[carebear0202]

You know I did the same things...I had an ectopic in this past April and was wondering if it was all the diet soda....the hot bath taking.... handling pet medication without gloves...I could make myself crazy wondering why it happened. But after I healed up physically and mentally, I am so happy to say that I am 17 weeks along now and this baby is in the right spot doing fine! I lost my left tube in ER surgery so I believe the left one just was not in good working order for some reason because the right side worked just fine with the conception of my 5 year old and now this one! So, try not to analyze yourself sick because we have no control over such things! Good luck :)