Do you/Did you hold your newborn ALL the time?

[sweetangel7]

My son is like a week and a half old.  So far, if he is awake, I am holding him...not because he is initiating it but because I feel like I need to...I feel guilty if I am not.  Yesterday, my husband talked me into putting him into his basinette right by me on the couch (a foot massage was very persuasive) and he did just fine.  So this a.m. when I wanted to eat breakfast, instead of holding him and doing everything one handed, I put him down and he has been fine...playing with his hands...gurgling/talking...HOWEVER I am the one who is not doing  fine...I fight every second whether I'm doing an okay thing...YET it was nice to eat with two hands (yogurt is hard one handed) and to have a hot cup of tea.

Is it alright to put him down for a bit every now and then even if he is alert and wide awake (I do put him down to sleep!) ?

[KeyD]

Do whatever you're comfortable with but know that your baby will be just fine in his bassinet or bouncy seat or on the floor beside you. I remember wanting to take the bassinet into the bathroom when I got a shower ( while DD was sleeping) just to keep her near me, but I didn't and DD was none the wiser. The feeling of needing to hold your new baby all the time will get better with time.

[smjmekg]

PS...the baby girl always wanted to be held, up until the last week or so...The parents have FINALLY got it in their heads that she's ok if she's put down once in a while...

[smjmekg]

Definitely okay to put him down when he's awake. I'll give you a good example of why. I put my son on his tummy and back a lot when he was little. He started rolling over both ways, tummy to back three days before he was three months, back to tummy while he was three months. I have an almost four month old (in a few days) baby girl I babysit, and her parents hold her all the time. She can't roll over yet, and can hardly hold her head up for more than a few seconds. Granted your son is only a week old, but they need the time to themselves to learn how to move, what they can do, and to grow developmentally. At four months my son could sit up by himself in one of those support seats, I think it was called a bumbo. It's totally understandable wanting to hold him a lot, I did the week or two, then started laying him down and just watching him.

[JoyRenee]

Definitely okay! I wish my first had let me put her down. Trying to pee while holding a baby in one arm is HARD to do! There'll be times to hold him and times to let him look around. I don't agree that he'll never learn to move and crawl, though, if held all the time. My firstborn, while held literally 24/7, started crawling when she was 5 months old (that's EARLY).

Do what you feel comfortable doing. You can't spoil newborns!

[jenkaye21]

YES YES YES it is okay!!  I know you want to hold him every second.  It is very tempting to do just that.  But in the long run, both you AND baby will be happier if he learns to just be *near* you.  Think about it; you can't possibly hold him 24/7 forever; there are other household things you'll have to tend to eventually. =).  It will be awful for you and him  if you have listen to him scream while you are doing things!

Trust me- been there, done that--after my first baby was born, I ate one-handed for about the next two years.  No Fun!! ; )

BTW, congats!!!! And don't worry about it yet, he's still so tiny, but start putting him down for a few minutes here and there, just stay close, and he'll learn to be happy with that.  

[alaysha]

I would let my daughter play in her bouncer or sit in her swing. I'd hold her about half the time (even when she was first born). Now Aspen is VERY independent. At about the time she could start crawling she's been going into her playroom and entertaining herself. I'll go in and check on her every once in a while and she'll just be playing with her toys. She's now 16 months and she still plays on her own. If she gets lonely though or wants me to join in she'll walk (crawl when she was younger) up to me and get my attention.

[Gina209]

Aww yes Caiden was NEVER put down! Hubby & I just always wanted to hold him...even when he slept we just loved snuggling with him. Than with all the visitors we had the following weeks, it seemed he was never put down.
Well that came back to bite us in the ***! At around 4 weeks old, you could NOT put him down to do anything! He always wanted to be held and walked around with...I seriously got nothing done! Which is why I lost 35 pounds in 2 weeks, I never ate. I was always so busy holding him the first couple weeks (my choice) and than afterwords he never let me put him down!

Now that he is older, he plays with himself and wiggles around, trying to roll over, so he is content being on the floor or in his chair and not being held. But in the beginning, you just always want to hold them...I mean c'mon we wait 9 months to do it! But it is more than okay to put them down...it's good for them. You do feel guilty at first, but you'll soon come to realize you need to do it! And its best for the baby :)

[martikadragoon]

Congrats!! Ok, they say you can't spoil a baby.... Well TJ was held 24/7 after he was born... he'd SCREAM if we didn't hold him and rock him to sleep, then he went back into the hospital and we couldn't hold him........

Now that he's home he does just fine on his own, I'd say about %50 we hold him and the other %50 we let him play with his toys and entertain himself (we DO play with him alot of that time... but during house chores and stuff I let him play by himself)

With this baby, we're gonna hold him or her but we're not going to hold the baby ALL the time.... KWIM?     Because we want this one to learn like TJ did to be able to sooth himself or herself to sleep.

[heatherlynn22]

lol i was the same way with my boys. unfortunately for me i had twins. so if i held them (and i HAD to hold them both at the same time...if not i felt like i was loving one more than the other) i had no free hands. it took me a while but i learned it was ok to let them sit and play or discover new things. now.....they LOVE being on the floor  playing with their toys and exploring everything.

[nutz19]

First of all CONGRATS!!!!
Its perfectly fine to put him down. i know it seems hard to put him down but believe me if he gets to used to it he'll expect it ALL the time, break the habit while you can. :)

[babybemine]

awwwwww!!!!! Yes, hun. It is not only okay, but also important to put him down when he is awake. He needs to be able to wiggle and play in order to develop his fine and gross motor skills. If ya don't put him down he'll never learn to roll over, sit up etc.  However, he needs the snuggle time just as much as mommy does. Just balance it, and for godssake, eat your yogurt. lol.