Seeking opinions on a Miscarriage Community

[Med Help]

Hi,

We've had several requests to create a community regarding miscarriages and to help give support when one happens. We wanted to see how everyone felt before creating it, since right now most of this conversation takes place in the Pregnancy communities. Let us know and thanks.

MedHelp

[Nadia77]

further more, I joined medhelp before i get pregnant so I was interested in finding out how other woman are doing after  a miscarriage, whether they were able to get pregnant or have successful pregnancies, and I found so many responds to my questions from woman being through miscarriages and were pregnant responding to my posts,  I found this to b very inspiring.... where as if I was only getting response from woman going through multiple miscarriages would have been very concerning and worrying for me!!

[Nadia77]

I have noticed that since we started to have toooo many communities there has been less response to questions raised, as some said people do not go to browse more than 1 or 2 communities, and this way people will miss out on many questions raised which may be able to offer support. for example at the moment I am pregnant and I only go to pregnancy 21- 34 community and some times September mumies ( its too quite there!) but if i see a miscarriage question in these communities I will offer my advise as I have been through one myself, but would not go to a miscarriage community...

[carisa]

I would join it, I had my first mc last year after my first IVF, it was very painful physically and mentally. Carisa

[JoyRenee]

I do not see it in the Related Communities column.

[Med Help]

Hi,

Mostly the feedback has been positive on this, so I think we should at least try it out as JoyRenee suggested. We just created the community. It is located at: http://www.medhelp.org/forums/show/283 and also on the right hand side at the "related communities".

Thank you everyone for their feedback.

MedHelp

[caslovesjim]

I would really appreciate something like this i am still going through m/c and i dont have any family members or friends that have gone through this i am 23 and from a very small town so i don't have alot of options and doctors don't have alot of time to explain things to me or deal with all my concerns and fears and its nice to talk to people that are dealing or have dealt with a m/c before...This is my first and i am terrified i cant sleep at night i think of every worst outcome and i am scared to try again and have to go through it my husband tries to be there but he just doesn't understant how intrusive the exams are or how they make you feel and i get really upset with him because he just doesn't understand.......And i hate to say it but your right Mumita i cant stand the sight of pregnant women i rip out pages of them in magazines turn the channel on tv and i know i evil eye them when i see them in public this is normal right???

[Mumita]

It would be great to have the miscarriage forum if the pregnant ladies that have gone through this would sign up for it too to encourage the women that have gone through the m/c.  I just don't see people wanting to look back at a m/c when they're having a good pregnancy, not to be superstitious but I'm sure some people just want to move on and not think about it because it is sad and painful experience.
I think that we are all big girls here and we can talk about the good and bad and very ugly of pregnancy as we've done before with great discussions that we've had.  
Plus the m/c forum seems like the sad and depressing forum.  I kinda preffer the quirky pregnant forum at least it doesn't remind me so much of my loss, it makes me think of it more as part of being female and the things we go through.

[MrsGordon524]

I love the idea. I have suffered through 4 miscarriages and each time my world collapsed and I felt that I had no where to turn.

[JoyRenee]

Mumita, I often visit miscarriage forums to share my story of becoming pregnant after my miscarriage. If people actively made a point to go in there to encourage other women, that'd be a good idea. What do you think?

[Cheesecake7]

I think it would be nice.  When going through my miscarriages I really wanted to talk to people going through the same thing.  Posting on a pregnancy forum was depressing for me at that time. Plus, I felt like I was bothering the pregnant people with my bad news.  I think having the separate forum would be nice, then if you want to post there you can. You still have the option to post on the pregnancy forum if you feel more comfortable there. Its not much different than posting a question about fertility on the fertiltiy forum, or you can post it here....  It gives those going through it the option.

I see it as a speciality forum. For example, we have forums for each month of due dates, "Jan 09," "Feb 09," etc.  and we still have the larger pregnancy forum. Why is creating a speciality miscarriage forum any different from this?  I think it is a wonderful idea.

[Mumita]

For some reason I have mixed feeligns about this.  I wish I was pregnant more than anything and that I didn't experience a miscarriage however I'd like to learn from those that had the experience and now are pregnant. A forum just for miscarriages seems kinda alienating specially when the one's that have had miscarriages and are now pregnant probably wouldn't go there, since thinking about miscarriage is the last thing you want/should do.
I think that talk about miscarriages belongs in the pregnancy forum at the same time, I wouldn't want to make the pregnant ladies feel bad about being pregnant when others can't.  Its the same as a ttc forum.
There's been posts of miscarraiges for a long time, why now separate?

[PENNY1705]

i think its a great idea.i had 2 m/c and i would love to talk to other women about the same experiences and thoughts.

[agomez333]

I think it would be a great idea. I did not know about this forum when I lost my baby last July, but just seeing a pregnant woman would almost bring me to tears. I couldn't imagine loosing a baby and then have to weed through all the happy pregnant moms to try to get support. I would rather get support from someone going through the same thing...
There are alot of women on here who have suffered a lot of loss who could definately offer amazing advice to someone needing it...
I do see the points of others though about not wanting too many forums... But if I was new I would not want to go ito a pregnancy forum to discuss a miscarriage or stillbirth and cause fear among those pregnant...
Just my thoughts...

[feather2e]

I think it would be a great idea. There are so many women who suffer when they lose their baby and it would be wonderful for them to speah to people in the same position.

[mommato4]

Great idea, whats taking so long? lol  I'D LOVE TO JOIN...

[dallaslady32]

I think its a good idea I have had two miscarriages myself within 7 months it would be nice to chat with others who have experienced the same things as oppose to reading about all those who seem to be having a successful pregnancy! Just being able to vent to someone who understands would be nice. I go into the preganancy forums, but after a miscarriage it gets harder and harder to stroll through!!!

[Atlantisea]

I think it is a good idea. Less upsetting for the women seeking support and seeing all the pregnancy questions getting answered and theirs travelling downwards. Lots of them end up feeling like we are more interested in people with living pregnancys or babies, because there is a smaller amount of response to the depressing posts. I know I find it upsetting to have to read them or just see them there. It isn't long ago that I lost my baby, and I would like to move on and forget my pain. Which is a bit hard to do with them screaming out in angst!

There will always be dilligent posters that pop over to check that the forum is active enough and that they are getting support..

[msgorgeous]

that would be total wonderful but i do have to agree it might not be as active

[krushing]

Yes, I too think it's a good idea.  I've had 2 m/c and I'd like to share my experiences and hear others.  

[pmperez]

I think its a good idea, people who have had them can support those who are going through it and speak about their own experiences...plus people dont just go to 1 forum they check out a few, Im apart of this one and Nov Mommies.

[JoyRenee]

MedHelp, you could always do a trial run of the Miscarriage Support (maybe for 3 months) and if it doesn't work out we could just take it out. I've been involved in other message boards before and having a miscarriage/loss support forum would have periods of heavy traffic.

[evthing4reason]

I would rather just have it all in one community becuase less people would be active in a miscarriage forum and you wouldn't get as good as support as this pregnancy forum

[LosingMyMindInGA]

They probably will....but my point was that for me, having experienced m/c's and being able to GIVE that support and information I don't usually have time to scan so many different forums.  BUT like you said at the same time someone will look for something geared towards that before thinking to come to a pregnancy forum.  Six of one half dozen of the other.  I just don't want to see everythign picked apart and put into a hundred different forums.  

Just like with the due date communities...I rarely even check them becuase there doesn't seem to be too much activity.  Atleast there wasn't on the Aug 08 community the last I looked.  Too many places to look.  

BUT I think that if a new forum is created is should be a "LOSS" forum...not just miscarriage...something that could cover stillbirth and people who have lost infants relatively close after birth.  

[JoyRenee]

GA, I totally see your point! It's hard when there's a forum for each and every single thing. But I think that people who are seeking support specifically for miscarriage will look for Miscarriage Support before they come into a pregnancy forum. What do you think?