Ideas

[bsjolie]

I have an 8 year old beautiful girl named McKenzie. She is very use to be the only child in the family. She is going to have a little brother soon! I am due February 3. We have been including her in many things for the baby including picking out the name, decorating his room, shopping for: clothes, diapers, and toys. She has enjoyed this but was jealous at the baby shower because the baby was getting gifts and not her...I dont want her to feel left out. I have been thinking I should get her a gift/something special when the baby is born so she still feels special too & does not feel left out. Anyone have any ideas for a meaningful gift that an 8 year old girl would like?

[Ohprettywoman]

Whatever you do, after the baby is born, make sure you spend alone time with big sister. One on one. She'll be less jealous if she and dad go out for Ice Cream every once in a while. Or mom and her buy new clothes at the mall. I can see both sides of the gift, no gift argument.  If you do get her a gift, I would say it's from her new sibling. I heard someone say once that the best gift you can give a child is a sibling and I wholeheartedly believe that. Whatever decision you make, know your daughter will adapt and overcome the jealousy if you allow her to.

[jesshat]

I didn't say that what we gave our son was from the baby and he also got something for the baby so they got something from each other.

[ltreff]

I got my daughter a gift from the baby for when I am due. The gift bag contains play doh paper book and colors, a blanket she can use to wrap baby in, snacks for when she is in the waiting room, a necklace I had engraved with big sister and her name. And lastly a camera so she can take her own pictures I am looking forward to seeing the day through her eyes. Just some ideas :)

[Skittles_2_1_15]

So many typos uhh sometimes I hate auto text..

[Skittles_2_1_15]

Not at all I wasn't feeling like you was stepping on an toes matter or fact my toes are fine lol.. we all are entitled to our opinions.. so I know in don't feel any way about your comment I was just saying my situation as well.. and I also feel the young the kids are the easier it is but that also has amaybe thats not true kinda answer also because all kids are different..

[cecilia_morgan]

Im sry I by no means meant to step on anyone's toes!:-( maybe this want something I should have had an opinion on as my child is 3 and very excited lol I was 5 when my brother was born only child only grandchild etc. But I couldn't have been happier with him. I guess I just don't understand y an 8 year old can't understand and be happy about a sibling? Some jealously w/o I should think would be normal I just meant I don't feel the child should be given 'special' treatment to cope I feel it could make it worse play on her emotions etc.

[Skittles_2_1_15]

I feel it's nothing wrong with a child being jealous.. my daughter is 10 and she is not happy with the baby at all.. I try and help her understand she is use to having everything revolve around her.. being the only child for so long so you cannot blame a child for feeling a way about a new baby.. but you can help them cope and be involved.. no I haven't brought her extravagant gifts or threw any big sister parties but the lady asked any ideas so I gave her one... But any ole way.. everyone handles situations differently and I feel who am I to judge but if you wanna spend money or what ever to make your child feel special also since the daughter was at the babyshower I don't see anything wrong with doing something nice for her also.. an nope it don't have to be a party like I suggested..

[cecilia_morgan]

Ok 8 11 lol w.e. but I agree with rockrose. She didn't need to be soiled more and pampered and made to feel like a little princess she needs to understand it's not all about her that things will be equal love, gifts, attention etc. She should understand she doesn'T need to be jealous but loving towards the baby and treated fairly. Im sry but unless she's a spoiled brat she's old enough to understand.

[bsjolie]

Thank you ladies! These are all great ideas. I want to find her something meaningful to help her see it is also a celebration for her becoming a big sister and that is a special role too. I think 90% of the time she is very excited to big a big sister. Lately she has been upset sometimes because kids at school are telling her that no one will pay any attention to her anymore and everyone in the family is only going to care about the baby...We have done a lot of education with her about babies needs and what to expect and how she can help and be involved. But i don't want her to resent her brother. It will be an adjustment for everyone in the family, but I keep thinking about it more as we get closer to the due date. Wish me luck! And i wish everyone else luck who is in similar situations!

[RockRose]

Skittles,  oh sorry,  you're right.  My bad.  

On the other hand,  I think teaching generosity is something I didn't do very well and to my surprise my kids are generous.  Despite my not working to teach it.

[Skittles_2_1_15]

Rockrose she said her daughter is 8 not 11 hun..

[dorkiemama83]

I'm making my ten yr old daughter a big sister tote bag and give it to her at the baby shower. I'm going to get her big sister tee shirt, coloring book, candies, and a mother/daughter necklace. Good luck!!!

[jess56m]

I got my girls a sweet but inexpensive necklace on etsy. Its says big sister w there initial and a bead they will love !

[chloegc1023]

My son is 8 and I'm due in Feb with his baby brother. I always talk to my son and explain to him that baby will require a lot of attention and that everyone including him will want to be there for baby.  And no matter what, he'll always be mommy's first born and that mommy loves so much.  That will never change.   So far he is not in the least bit jealous, and everytime I bring something home for baby he gets all interested in what it is and pretends that baby is here by dressing up one of his stuffed toys with a onesie.  He'll hold it like a baby and put the toy in whatever it is I bring home.  I think my son is prepared to be a big brother because I always reassure him that he was once a baby and everyone wanted to pay him lots of attention and now it a babys turn.  Just talk to ur daughter and reassure her.  I think she'll be fine..

[RockRose]

I kind of think you need to work the other way,  rather than including her more and more and giving her gifts for herself from the baby,  you need to allow her to pick out a gift FROM her to the baby.  

As a mom my biggest mistake was shielding my kids from acting generously and maturely and always trying to make things about them,  and make life more easy on them while I neglected to teach them the lesson of graciousness and giving.  They've learned it,  and are great young men,  and are generous despite me shielding them from that lesson.  I can think of so many examples of when I should have allowed my kids to be generous without giving them any payback at all except to say good job,  you're a good kid.

Eleven years old is really kind of old to be jealous at a baby shower that she's not the one receiving the gifts.  She's the much much older sister.  She is on the side of the adults,  not on the side of competing with a baby for baby gifts.

Best wishes.  I know you want to wrap her in cotton during this time,  but from experience - this is the time to encourage her to be selfless and giving,  and not expect to receive.

Been there,  wish I had a do-over.  ;D

[jesshat]

My son was 6 when my other son was born but he has done great and is super excited about his sister coming in a few months and he spent the 2 nights with us even in the hospital because we didn't have family to send him to and my husband wanted to stay with me and we got him Legos and he was just fine. Not sure what we are going to do when she comes because he will be 7 and my other son will have just turned 1 a few days before.... As long as everything goes as planned unlike last time... Lol

[bump2015]

I'm 8 years older than my brother and felt very jealous when he was first born. I have a 6 year old daughter now, and didn't want her to feel the same way I did. We've kept her very involved in all the baby stuff, like you described you have with yours.
I got her a big sister present that's in the hospital bag waiting for the big day. We're going to give it to her while we're at the hospital, either when we have a few mins alone just the 3(well, 4) of us or my husband will pull her aside and give it to her privately. It's a necklace, with a heart shaped crystal set in a silver ribbon looking design that says "sisters always, forever friends". I wish I could post a picture of it cause my description does not do it justice.

[keaanddan03]

At the hospital in my town they have a class for soon to be big sisters and brothers. They even give a cerificate at the end. Its really cute :-) maybe see if anything local has anything like that :-)

[Skittles_2_1_15]

Invite her friends over an have a little party for her for becoming a new big sister lol idk I just thought it sounds cute.. ask if those parents can bring her small nice gifts.. aka early Christmas gifts.. let her feel she has the spot light and that should make her feel special.. get her lil nails and feet done before her lil party..