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quiting smoking advice
well i notice there are not many men on these fourms but as a soon to be father i cant help be conserned.well my wife is in her 8th month now and since we found out we where having a baby smoking was a concern of mine .Since we found out all i hear from here is well mom said this and mom said that kinda stuff and im cutting back and im gonna quit but its actually the opposite.She smoke ALOT !!!!!!!!!! I have never had a problem with anxeity untill now i have read up on the possibilites that come with smoking and cant stand the thought of it , it literaly makes me sick when i see her light up time after time thinking about her suffocating our baby.i really cant take it n e more!what do i do?what can i do ?the one thing that really bothers me is that ever where i turn it mommy's this and mommy's that and the only things i can find for men to read about what to expect or how to do things it pretty much just says hang in there.My wife has two younger sibblings both have several mental and physical problems.her mother smoked dureong her pregnany as well. One child has a sever case of adhd, as well as behaior problems the other is always sick always needing some medicine for something.Is it wrong for me to think that since there is a link between the smoking and all there problems.?should i even be this concerned? I am not gonna be the type of person that will love my son any diffrent if there is something wrong at birth.i love my son with all my heart and will do ne thinf for him but i know personaly what it is like to grow up unhealthy, withsomething that other kids will torment other kids for .to feel like the world has it in for you. i dont want my son to have to go threw n e of that. am i wrong for that? im sorry but i cant find n e where to go to get advice from any one i hope some one here can give me some adivce or just talk to me about or let me know if im just crazy and im the only one that thinks like this lol well hope to here some feed back
yeah well thanks for the feed back its really help me alot .although i havent gotten my wife to quite smoking im getting over it as hard as it is i mean she has smoke for nine months now so whats a couple weeks goona do? i just been praying alot hoping for the best hope other people are too but i decided i cant go through the stress of it again so having another child after this one is not looking good t this point unless she quits .i just cant deal with the anxiety i get from it so hope she has a change of heart really soon
Unlike Michelle, I smoked like a chimney and desperate though I was to have a baby, I wasn't going to do so until I quit because I couldn't stomach the thought of, as you say "suffocating my child" and causing God-knows-what problems for him/her.
I had a HELL of a time quitting. Tried patches and tablets and gum and what have you but couldn't do it.
And then I read a book. And I am SO not the sort to read self-help books. But someone told me it worked for them and I had nothing to lose so I tried. In fairness, I read it the first time and a couple of weeks after I finished it and stopped smoking, I started again. So I read it again. I was sure it wouldn't work but there was nothing else left to try.
I put that book down after the second read about two years ago and haven't picked up a cigarette since and am now delivering in two weeks.
Perhaps your wife would be willing to read the book??
The brilliant thing about it is that she doesn't have to stop smoking while reading the book. In fact, it is recommended that you don't stop until you finish the book. So no stress. She can keep smoking... read the book and see how she feels at the end.
If you want to give it a try, the book is "The Easy Way to Quit Smoking" by Alan Carr.
It's not a big book so it shouldn't take her long to read. And I swear, I never dreamed I'd quit but it really was, as the title says, quite easy. Shockingly so.
Much as I hate to say this though, I don't see what other choice there is. Nagging her isn't going to work as I'm sure you know. And stressing her out over it will probably only do more harm. Besides, quitting 'cold turkey' while pregnant is said to be pretty bad in itself due to the amount of stress that goes with that. I mean, I ended up quitting 'cold turkey' after reading the book the second time but I didn't go through any hideous 'withdrawal' or stress or anything. Again, it was easy.
Might even help you.
I had a HELL of a time quitting. Tried patches and tablets and gum and what have you but couldn't do it.
And then I read a book. And I am SO not the sort to read self-help books. But someone told me it worked for them and I had nothing to lose so I tried. In fairness, I read it the first time and a couple of weeks after I finished it and stopped smoking, I started again. So I read it again. I was sure it wouldn't work but there was nothing else left to try.
I put that book down after the second read about two years ago and haven't picked up a cigarette since and am now delivering in two weeks.
Perhaps your wife would be willing to read the book??
The brilliant thing about it is that she doesn't have to stop smoking while reading the book. In fact, it is recommended that you don't stop until you finish the book. So no stress. She can keep smoking... read the book and see how she feels at the end.
If you want to give it a try, the book is "The Easy Way to Quit Smoking" by Alan Carr.
It's not a big book so it shouldn't take her long to read. And I swear, I never dreamed I'd quit but it really was, as the title says, quite easy. Shockingly so.
Much as I hate to say this though, I don't see what other choice there is. Nagging her isn't going to work as I'm sure you know. And stressing her out over it will probably only do more harm. Besides, quitting 'cold turkey' while pregnant is said to be pretty bad in itself due to the amount of stress that goes with that. I mean, I ended up quitting 'cold turkey' after reading the book the second time but I didn't go through any hideous 'withdrawal' or stress or anything. Again, it was easy.
Might even help you.
What I would do is google effects of smoking during pregnancy. Here's a site I found that has good information actually does say smoking is linked to ADHD.
http://www.chem-tox.com/pregnancy/smoking.htm.
Then you can confront your wife with facts and accredited sources. I have never smoked a cigarette in my life, so I am bias on the subject, but I feel like if my husband were to confront me out of pure concern for our child and ask me to stop smoking during pregnancy, I would do it at least for him. But I also can't even stand being around second hand smoke when I imagine my baby inhaling the same air I do. It's not fair to him and it's my job to look out for my baby's well being. So again, I'm very bias.
At this point in pregnancy, it might be a lost cause considering she has 4 weeks left. But, if you're really bothered, you should talk to her about it.
Not the best advice, I'm sorry... but I hope it helps a little! Good luck. Either way, I'm sure your son will be beautiful and the absolute love of your life!
http://www.chem-tox.com/pregnancy/smoking.htm.
Then you can confront your wife with facts and accredited sources. I have never smoked a cigarette in my life, so I am bias on the subject, but I feel like if my husband were to confront me out of pure concern for our child and ask me to stop smoking during pregnancy, I would do it at least for him. But I also can't even stand being around second hand smoke when I imagine my baby inhaling the same air I do. It's not fair to him and it's my job to look out for my baby's well being. So again, I'm very bias.
At this point in pregnancy, it might be a lost cause considering she has 4 weeks left. But, if you're really bothered, you should talk to her about it.
Not the best advice, I'm sorry... but I hope it helps a little! Good luck. Either way, I'm sure your son will be beautiful and the absolute love of your life!
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