Pregnant and Depressed

[Natvaz]

I am 24 weeks pregnant with my first baby, a boy. I've been with my boyfriend for 4 years and we've had our ups and downs, but we've never broken up. Since May of this year we've had some tough financial problems, mostly because of him, they took his car away because he want paying it, so without transportation, I've had to walk and carpool to my work, and since I'm the only one who cares about the house chores and bills, I've been taking care of them also. I know he is lazy and not dependant at all but I still love him. Hes been staying with his aunt to use her car to go to work until he fixes his older car, but I just can't live in another persons home like that, I need my space and more now than ever. So we decided that ill be home and he'll stay there until we can have a car. It's been this way since June, and I just feel so alone and depressed. He just isn't cooperating at all. The house is a mess and the babys room isn't even started. I just feel that I'm doing this all by myself. I'm living alone, sleeping alone with my cats, paying all bills, everyday is unpredictable to get to work, or even to eat cause I can't walk to the grocery store cause it's too far away. I cry a lot everyday, I can't sleep well and I cry a lot more when I think about how much it must hurt the baby to feel his mother like this. I'm supposed to be having the best time being pregnant, but I'm just sad all the time. My family doesn't even know all of this, they think I'm so happy, i cant tell them because I don't want them to feel guilty or responsible. They were against me moving in with my boyfriend and I don't want to give them a reason to judge. I can't talk to anybody, I have 2 friends and all they think about is going out, parties and boys. I just want my boyfriend to wake up before it's too late. Have him appreciate all the sacrifices I do to survive this. I'm doing all of this without him and it breaks my heart to see him so laid back. I called him last night bawling and just screaming my lungs out that I was so unhappy with this situation and that I wanted him home, I wanted support and for him to step up. I know he feels bad about it but after they took his car away he just has such a low self esteem that he doesn't even know that it affects me so much. Two depressed people can't be together. I'm just trying to hold on, for my baby boy, trying to stay strong. Even though I feel so horribly alone I know I'm not completely alone, I know that everytime I rub my belly...

[angelx1]

I am sorry you're in this situation and feel this way. Your boyfriend needs to man up and help you out. But in the meantime, I would open up to your family that you trust and let them know what's going on. Everyone needs help from time to time and family isn't there to judge, but to help. You don't need this stress bottled up inside...let it out to somebody you trust. You will feel better and maybe someone can help resolve any problems. Its better then not saying anything at all. I hope you feel better and know that you're not alone.

[weldermom]

i feel you on how your baby feels all your emotions and i know they do because when im upset he moves alot which makes me even sadder just try be strong i know its hard as hell

[BSBrown2015]

I'm not trying to compare myself to you in anyway, but I was in similar circumstances. I moved in and out two or three times between my bf and grandparents house. You are very correct the baby feels everything you do and needs you to be strong. I know this is a difficult time in your life right now but without or without your boyfriend you have to make it for the sake of that precious baby boy. Telling you this makes me think of all of the times I called my mom crying on the phone and she would tell me the exact thing I am about to tell you, it's not about you anymore it's about that baby now. I'm sorry that your going through all of this and I really hope everything gets better for you. I just thought you needed to hear it form someone who has lived a similar life take care sweetie.