Name Change

[TeenMommy_2015]

So my baby daddy just made it official that we are not going to be together after 3 years of being together and 3 weeks before our son is born.
He was gonna be named after him to be a Jr but after this I don't want that.
So I decided to change his name but I don't know if it sounds good.
Josiah/Josaiah Adriel Villagomez?
Any opinions?

[MarriedMommyOf2]

Honestly, if you aren't married i wouldn't give the child his last name. For legal reasons. If the child has your name when you do someday decide to get married you can have the deserving stepfather adopt your child without considering your childs biological father. Be smart about it i know emotions are running high. I know plenty of women think the child needs the biological father.... but if he isn't a positive influence... then 9/10 times they are better without. Plus because you aren't married he has NO claims to your child. Then someday when you find "mr.right" you can have a real stable family for your child yourself and your husband.

[TeenMommy_2015]

I hate people being judgemental . makes me feel like I can't ask for any advice on here. But I know what im gonna do all I asked was how did the name sound not all this negativity im grateful for the people who were supportive.

[TeenMommy_2015]

Thank you Yuna86

[yuna86]

People are being a bit judgementle here I think! I think being heartbroken and left to bring up a child on her own after thinking she was in this for the long haul is alot to take in...maybe she doesn't want to hear daddys name everyday? Maybe she finds it too hurtful to be reminded everyday? Maybe shes feeling angry and resentment for being left heartbroken whilst trying to be a mummy with a newborn whuch believe me is hard! And maybe she doesnt want her child to have the name that she feels so strongly against right now...did she say daddy wasnt aloud to see baby? Or daddy doesnt get second name etc...norhing to do with childish. She askes a question if you cant be nice pipe down and skip the post

[army_mommy_to_be]

I am a ftm at 23 weeks, I am not in your situation but I've seen it personally with me, my mom and my "father" I had his last name until I got married at 18. Personally If I wouldn't have gotten married at 18 I would have legally removed my "dad's" last name, he abused my mother physically while she was pregnant with me and he was locked up right after I was born and was with us for a couple years and then be left us to be with someone else. So I have no respect for him. As far as your little baby boy think about the long run, what if his father wants to be there at first and leaves and he'll know when he grows up and maybe will hate his last name etc. when people tell me "he's your father" I disagree he's more of a sperm donor. I'm getting off subject here, but think about the long run, you don't want him hating his name because it's different than yours or than other siblings right? I was sad all the time because all my sisters have the same name as my mom but I'm the only one that doesn't -.- whatever you choose will be the right decision because your the mom and your motherly instincts will know what's right for your child.

[alybelz]

Hi I was in your exact situation 2014 and my ex abused me physically, verbally and emotionally and he threatened me to name my son after him.  first and last name.. I waited until we had to sign the birth certificate before I finalised my son's name but the ex still carried on his crap so I name my son after my dad and my last name.. moral of my story he doesn't see my son or contact him he missed his first birthday he doesn't pay anything and never did and it was difficult but  I am alot happier I have met someone that absolutely adores my boy and gives him the world and more.. as long as you have family and friends to support you.. you make what ever decisions are best for your baby and you xx Good luck

[TeenMommy_2015]

Thanks to all you ladies even the ones with rude comments all I was really asking for was an opinion on how the name sounded. Yes he is a dead beat I spoke to him today and made him realize many things. I know what I will do with my kid thanks for supporting me to the people who actually helped me

[crittermom21]

you can name YOUR BABY anything you want.do not feel obliged to name it after a piece of **** sperm donor..just saying.most of all its your baby not his.

[AnnieBrooke]

I've worked in an elementary school and met at least one mom who really didn't like the situation that her ex's last name was on her kid's paperwork because the guy is a total deadbeat and not present since the child was born, but couldn't take it off because it cost money to do an official name change and the school is required to use the kid's legal name.  Save yourself the trouble, don't give the baby this guy's last name if thinking of him is, for you, remembering his verbal abuse and his physical abuse.  It will irritate you every time you have to use the child's legal name.  Also, if your child has your last name, people know immediately that your child is your child, and if the child does not have your last name, they won't know until you explain it.  Don't be in the position of being irritated by the continued presence of a name of someone who was awful to you.

If you are thinking of the last name for child-support reasons, child support is not dependent on the child having the father's last name, just on proof that the child is from that dad.  DNA tests are usually asked for when the couple is not married, what the baby is named is not considered proof.

[mikayla1214]

Dont give that baby his name , he honestly doesnt even deserve to have a baby if he doesnt have his priorities straight , but if i have a boy i plan on naming him josiyah as well but adding the " y " in there but the original way is nice too " josiah "

[BMCGomez]

*but remember *

I read my comment and thought "juan" how is juan... haha

[BMCGomez]

Oh my goodness.  People on here are crazy. I apologize if I offended you teenmommy_2015. When I said you do what you must I meant I don't know the whole situation.  In the post it never said he hit you or he doesn't take care of his son. People need to CHILL out. Getting hype for no reason just personal opinions.  I hope and wish you the best juan remember it's all about you and your son and this website is not going to be there for you like a support group will. Look into some community support groups! It will make you feel better!

[opi83]

After you saying all that, it's messed up that instead you you decided to end the relationship he did. That relationship wasn't healthy at all. If he was acting that way then you should have never even had the thought to name your son after him. I proly wouldn't even give my child his last name ether. Never the less, it's your baby boy, you name him what u want to. If u don't think he will be active in your child's life... it's kinda like telling a dead beat dad happy father's day... HELL NAH. Lol

[Masoak]

I agree with changing the first name I would also suggest giving the kid ur lastname too if he isn't going to be a part of the kids life or at the very least hyphenate it..i wish I had done that with my first 2 it would have made things much easier ie to travel with them etc..much easier if their lastname is the same

[SerenitysMommy21]

It's not childish nor bitter, and people name calling need to put a foot in there mouth especially when they don't know the whole situation. She asked for advice not judgement!

Now, I don't blame you at all. Honestly, it would be smart to give the baby your last name for numerous reasons. People will argue all day for what they morally think is right, but it's not about them or the baby daddy! It's about you and that baby. I flat out had a l&d nurse tell me, momma to momma, not to put baby daddy on birth certificate if he wasn't around. I already planned not to, but that spoke volumes to me.

[Teambluefor2]

Screw him if he can't even support you what kind of man is that? I don't think it's at all childish not to name the baby after him. No man who hits a woman even deserves a child. I think the name Josiah is very cute. And the baby has all he needs with just you. I hope the best of luck for u and ur little one.

[Kailalaa]

I agree completely with rockrose and you, there is no need to name the baby after him if you don't want to. That's your choice, your baby, and frankly- nobody's damn business. Don't let anyone make you feel bad or tell you you're being "selfish". If he hasn't been there to support you you shouldn't bank on him being there for baby. Honestly I wouldn't even give baby his last name. Itll be easier for you as a single mother if he has your name and you can still get child support from your ex. I think you're being pretty smart and strong about this so, good for you ! And good luck (:

Btw, I think Josiah is really cute

[MamaDreaa]

You should give him your last name & name him what you want !! If he hasn't supported you or the baby then there's really no need for you to name him after him. That's not bein childish at all, you live & you learn . It's about what's best for you & your baby. Do what you think is best ! Josiah is a pretty name

[RockRose]

Well,  I don't even think I'd name the baby his last name.  

You will probably go on to have more children in the future,  and the fewer last names that are in your household the better.  

And I like Josiah.  Very pretty - and everyone knows how to spell.

[TeenMommy_2015]

He has never supported me through out my pregnancy at all. He never did anything to make me happy. He hasnt bought anything for my son. Would you name your son after him of hes acted that way he hit me twice while pregnant and pushed me. Does he really deserve it?
He has in his mind that I'm a ho* a bit** anything in the book. My clothes don't even fit and I don't any clothes for my self after I give birth . He has never tried to make me happy. Whenever I don't want to have intercourse he says  saving it for someone else. Its not me being childish . he has been saying he's going to buy stuff for him since 2 months ago. Instead he goes with his friends and waste 800$ in one weekend with them

[willtowin160]

If the father plans on being in his son's life, the two of you should name him what will make both of you happy. Will the BD be okay with naming your son another name that both of you like? I understand your reasoning of not wanting a jr. if you're not going to be with the dad, especially if it is a painful breakup. However if you two already agreed on it, and BD plans to be a good father and positive influence in his child's life it's not right to take it away because you two are breaking up.

[BMCGomez]

I agree with opi83. A little bitter and childish. But he is your son you do what you must. With saying that the Josiah is really pretty.

[opi83]

So, because he has decided to no loner be in a relationship with YOU his son can't be a Jr. any more? I don't understand your decision. That's called being bitter and if u start this pattern it will only lead to "baby daddy, baby mama drama". You dint say that he dint want a relationship with his son...u said you....

[dasart13]

I agree with giving him the guys last name, but not naming him after him. My bf wants me to make this kid the 4th, after him. I am totally against it, for multiple reasons.