Please no judging...

[cnj76]

I have been debating on posting this for some time now. I really don't want things out in the open like this but since it's stressful for me right now, I figured I would ask some questions about bankruptcy. Before my husband and I got together, he was with someone else in which in that time he accumulated a lot of debt. Well, that debt has finally caught up to him and has forced us into bankruptcy. I'm just about 8 months pregnant so the stress is overwhelming to me right now. They have been garnishing his check each week when it should have been stopped. I believe this week should be HOPEFULLY the last week of them taking any money. The lawyer says they are supposed to give it back but we don't know when that will be. We are behind on a car payment now which is the one thing we asked to keep because we are due with another baby in just 9 weeks and need something that will fit 3 car seats. If they wouldn't have been taking money, we'd been able to keep up with our bills. Everything is caught up for right now but the car. Which will be paid soon if they don't garnish this week. It's a lot more stressful when you have two small children that depend so much on you. I had debt as well but all of mine but one were medical so I filled along with my husband so we get it wiped out all at once. I am super stressed because it's caused tension between my husband and I with lack of money for bills as you can imagine. We haven't been truly happened in quite some time now. I cannot wait to get all of this over with. We have a court date set for next Friday.

Has anyone ever been through this before? I feel so embarrassed and ashamed. My husbands debt added up before he was full time at his job. And his ex is off in la la land not giving a care in the world. Which makes me angry because he couldn't tell her no when they were together. Got her anything she wanted. Which is totally different from me because I never ask for anything. I don't feel ashamed at my husband. Just in general having to do this. Like I said before, we have court set for next Friday. It's for chapter 7... The lawyer said it shouldn't take long at all but I don't know what to expect. If you've gone through this before and aren't embarrassed, please give me some kind of idea on what to expect. I am a nervous wreck and the stress has been causing me problems during this pregnancy because I'm letting it get to me. That and I also have an anxiety disorder so the not knowing is killing me.

[cnj76]

Thank you all for taking the time out to reply to this. The good news is they didn't cut his check this week. So that means we will be able to get our car payment up to date and groceries! THANKFUL!!

We've been living off of what we already had at the house. Mainly freezer foods, salads, little things. My husband works night shift two weeks out of the month so those two weeks I am on my own for dinner and don't usually cook me a big meal. But I will tell you that eating something other than a frozen pizza or bowl of cereal is going to be so great. Hubby's in a much better mood now that we aren't broke right now! Stress is lifting up off of me slowly but surely. Now, I just gotta get the court date over with. Just so nervous. I have anxiety so a new place and new people, all that stuff, tends to get to me.. Just one more week and praying to God it is over!

[MamaMacMurtry]

My husband & I have seriously been considering filing for bankruptcy too. We both came into our marriage with more debt than we'd like and last year we had our truck reposessed, which didn't help at all. My debt is extra annoying because before I met my ex boyfriend, I had all but wiped the slate clean after nearly 5 years of carefully paying things off. My ex had kids & lacked drive, ambition or motivation, so I ended up supporting us and his kids for two years (its awfully hard to break up with children) and my bills and debts ended up going on the back burner more often than not. I went from a 730 credit score to somewhere in the low 400s. It ***** & now we're struggling to live paycheck to paycheck, barely. Our first child, a son, will be here in September & our craptastic insurance through my husband's job doesn't cover anything! Literally nothing. Thank you affordable healthcare act. Apparently we make too much money to qualify for assistance & can't switch plans without paying full premium for Obamacare, which we can't begin to afford. We live in Vermont, one of the highest cost of living states. Sometimes it seems like bankruptcy is our only option-but I know it sets us back for a long time too. I just don't know what to do. I feel for you, and I applaude you & your family for making such a difficult choice in order to help your family move through this.

[emt29817]

My hubby and myself got married young. We did what alot of young couples did and accumulated a huge amount of debt. We ended up in bankruptcy court. Yes it was embarrassing but when you get to court you will realize that every one that is there is in the same boat as yourself. It maybe different now but back then it was a court room full of people all filing bankruptcy so you kind of got a show and it makes you kind of feel better. The judge goes over your amount of debt that you are filing on and not the individual debt just the total and then its over. We stayed around after the judge saw us because there was a couple there filing that had over 5 million in debt and we wanted to see what all they owned on. (The size of the debt got it broken down into groups) I don't ever want to be back there again. Learn from this and everything will be fine. We are about 9 days from our 15th anniversary.our house and both cars are paid for and our first baby, a boy is due in Sept.  Things should get better from here on out for you guys.

[cnj76]

I told my husband that I will never do to him what she did and that we have kids so we need to think smarter and understand that his ex will never grow up and own up to what she did. We need to move on and just better ourselves from here on out for our kids. Either way, next weeks check should be a good one and I am so thankful for it. Hopefully it's this weeks check because my husbands attitude is already looking up this afternoon after talking with his payroll people.

He hasn't smiled or laughed in weeks. So it's nice to see him shining so bright right now! I just hope it doesn't get taken away from him again.

[kitty984]

I understand what you are going through. Before my husband and I got together he gave his ex-gf (gf then) the power of attorney to take care of his bills while he was on deployment.  Well that back fired on him and the chick and my husband's best friend opened up accounts under his SSN and racked up over $40,000 worth of debt! When we got together he had almost all the debt paid off thanks to his mom's help but after we got married we still kept getting new bills from the ex. When we had our first it was tough. We had to figure out how to get our bills paid so we consolidated our bills throguh a company and did that for 4 years! That bump on the road made us closer and we became more smarter with our finances. Things will look up for you.

[cnj76]

Thank you SO much soccermomma! I'm stressing big time..



I did just get news from my husband's pay roll that they didn't take any money this week.. we aren't sure if it's for the pay check he gets tonight or the one for next week because his next pay roll starts on Wednesdays. We will see tonight when I check our account. If this is for THIS week we will be caught up on our car payment and can stop stressing because we'll be able to go grocery shopping. It's been scarce around here for a little while. I make sure my kids are fed and I have been eating on freezer meals for a couple of weeks. I cannot wait until I can cook a BIG DECENT MEAL! :)

[soccermomma84]

I've filed bankruptcy.  Your court hearing is maybe 10 minutes long. Judge may ask a couple questions. And you're done! About 6 weeks after our court date we got our discharge papers from the court house.  Huge relief! Hope this helps :)

[ANNMARIE93]

Everything has to be bad to get good! Everything wil fall in place. I know somewhat how u feel. Just let everything in gods hands:)♥

[choeyoojin]

I am in the beginning of dealing with my boyfriend's debt. His father gained access to his eBay account. He sold a coin worth $7,000. Well the coin got returned but his father took the money anyways. Now my boyfriend's eBay account has gone to collections. It stressful because my boyfriend refuses to pay on it because it wasn't him but we have no hard evidence that it was his father.

I wish you the best of luck. If they garnish his checks we will end up going through my savings which I am not happy about.

[cnj76]

That every time... not everyone.. Phone is creating it's own sentences.

[cnj76]

Hubby gets paid tonight. It'll be deposited into the account. No idea how much it's going to leave us with. We are so broke right now I feel like crying. I have literally 5.00.... It hurts so bad when you have small children that want things and you can't get it right now and they don't understand why.

Hopefully they don't take as much this week so we can play some catch up on the car. Next week should be better but it's tough hearing my husband say all the time that everyone time he thinks he sees a light at the end of the tunnel, it's just another train :(

[naru89]

I understand where your comeing from with my husbands ex putting him into sever debt it took me three years of planning and saving and living off almost nothing but now we have been debt free for a year and now have a house :) don't you worry it will get better everything will work out keep your chin up

[cnj76]

we haven't been truly happy**** not happened.