is this for real!? (sorry long vent)

[saramay2014]

So i had my baby three weeks ago and i was expecting alot..... i wanted things to be diffrent between me n my bf (her dad) but for some reason he just keeps lieing to me over and over, its not about what hes doing thats got me so upset (it is alil bit) really its the lieing. Ive confrounted him over and over and over agin and im just getting so f*king tired of it!! Im ticked off.... he needed some money for "lunch at work" so i gave it to him and i had to run to the food stamp office so once he left i left and i ran into him at the gas station n he said he was just getting a drink n then i passed another gas station n he was there buying ciggarets with the money i gave him to get lunch, he lied about that and about smokeing, he said he wasnt smoking anymore. So i call him and he ignored all my calls cause he knows he got caught, so imma drive over to his house later with the baby n put her to sleep n once he gets home imma go off on him outside. This morning his dad was hurting his mom and me n the baby was there and he didnt even do anything! He said it would just make it worse but thats his mom he should have stoped his dad and it really upset me so i dont want to go over there but thats the only way imma get to talk to him so i have to. Either that or i can just stop talking to him for a few days and see how he likes the repercusions that hes caused.... sorry this is so long, rant over

[Chima7]

Why are you perpetuating this drama in your life? Shut it down.  Stop giving him money, stop going to his abusive and toxic parents house. You're a mom now, it's time for you to be the mature one in this farce of a "relationship" with this boy. It's clear that he is a complete loser and you're on your own with raising this baby. So be it. Be the bigger person and don't go over there, don't go chasing after him like a puppy dog, just be a mom to your kid and leave the boy to find his own money. You already know that going over there confronting him is just going to cause a scene, so don't do it. Don't give him any more money. Tell him to grow up. And stop expecting this guy to ever become something he's not. Unfortunately you picked the wrong guy to have a baby with. It's time for you to accept the fact that you're on your own with this parenting thing and move on with your life.

[BonitaMichelle]

He doesn't care

[Puddin200120]

You can't make anyone do anything they don't want to.   If you're at the did stamp office clearly you need your money more than he does.   No judgment I'd love to have some lol.   In a serious note I've been in worse situations and I've come to realize it's all about the baby that's where you put your focus.   Count your losses and move forward it's not worth the headache and disappoint please live and learn I wish I would have listened.   No calling or going by just take care of you and your child and ignore him when he does call unless it's too see the baby nothing else...

[saramay2014]

Yea i dont intend on going back over there with her for quite awhile if at all. If he wants to see us hes gunna have to come over here. I dont want my baby around that, i know personaly how it affects someone....

[AmyPrieto]

That doesn't sound like a safe situation for your child to be around. I would just stop communication and have him come to you and admit what he's done wrong. Maybe when he realizes that your pulling away he will change.

[saramay2014]

If he even started to id be gone... i grew up around my mom getting abused by my step dad so it kinda hit home today... yea the worst part is what happened today n he wouldnt do anything. He said he didnt wanna make it worse.... i dont beleive he would hurt me hes never been violent but ill keep it in mind

[dolly_b]

My auntie use to get hurt by her husband...the kids wittnessed it and she left coz she didnt want her boys growing up seeing that coz eventually they would become emotionless towards it and then do it themselves.  Be careful. For me, the thing that stuck out the most from ur post is he didnt do anything about it. Take care of urself and ur baby and make sure he never hurts u or the baby. Ill keep u in my prayers hun :)

[manukes4]

Pray for him, not being funny but it is hard to stop smoking. Just had my boy on February 15th but a year ago I prayed to God to help me stop smoking. Paying over 10 bucks a pack but couldn't stop. Shortly after asking God for help I found out I was pregnant needless to say he answered my prayers! I haven't had a smoke in 11 months and I don't miss it.  Be patient but choose your battles too. Let him know that you know it's hard and you want to help him. Maybe you can offer to give up a bad habit you have and you two support each other. Good luck

[babymk5]

Yea just stop communication for a minute. I mean why deal with foolish you just had a baby...his baby!!! He would have to starve cause I'll be damn if I give money to feed a lying loser. (sorry)