Aa
update again mom threatened me
So today my mon begs me to stay with them and live in the basement to pay rent. 250 a month. That's the entire basement however they can walk up and down as they please. So my problem is my boyfriend doesn't exactly wanna live with them after how I have been treated. He is concerned about our baby. But if I move out my parents lose welfare: food stamps and medical. So they kinda need me. But when I told them the father of my child had concerns they got angry. My mother told.me she was gonna take me off the car insurance plan and etc. So that's where I stand there. Am I in the wrong or dumb for wanting to live there in order to make everyone happy?
In my belief your parents are just using u for there own benefits... I have never seen a mother who would be do selfish.. She should help u ease up on this situation rather than putting u in stress or threatening u... But it is ur choice will u blindly go ahead n do everything she says.. Just remember parents or no... U r becoming a mother u r getting reslonsibility n thn u ll hve to stand for ur lil one... How ll u do when u cant evn do it for urself? Either let her know that coz u r getting all benefits due to me... Thn lets make some terms... The way she is doing u should negotiate with her the same way.. U ll stay in basement but wont pay a penny as thy are getting things out of u... Thy are not allowed to interrupt in ur life n neither will u... N if she threatened u again u ll be calling cops n things will get messy... I swear i would hve done tht... This way thy keep wht thy want n u keep thm away from u. .. Y doesnt ur father say nything in this... Is she threatens u thn u threaten her bck... Seriously... U need to stand up n start mking decisions...
I dont think I have a mom anymore I am a mom and that's all that matters being this little girl's hero
I told her I loved her and she didn't say anything to me. I'm kinda hurt by that more than anything in the world.
Huni i think its best if you dont stay with them, your boyfriend you need to take into consideration as hes your other half and your mum seems a bit money hungry no offence but puting money before your intrest
Yeah I'm gonna have to be blunt on this one so sorry if it comes out mean. But it sounds like your mother is using you and trying to blackmail you. A parent is supposed to love their child unconditionally, I remember so many times as a child my dad would tell me that there is nothing I could ever do to make him stop loving me. I would ask things like "even if I burnt the house down?" And he would say "yes. I would be mad and upset and really disappointed. But I would still love you all the same." And that is how every parent should be. If you think she will write you off for moving out and cutting off her welfare, then that should tell you a lot about your relationship with her. But the main thing here is in an earlier post you said you feel unsafe there and that she takes a lot of pills. If you feel you or your child are ever in danger, you need to leave immediately. She should be happy for you being on your own and starting your own little family, not trying to hold you back. I think you know what is best to do here, and I hope you make the right decision. Best of luck to you hun.
If I may... I'd say these ladies are right. Your parents are GROWN! Using you for welfare is wrong to you, your kid && people who really NEED it! Don't succumb to blackmail. If she takes you off the car insurance, get your own cart insurance! They'll let you have the basement but everybody can come and go as they please and you have to pay? Where's your privacy? if you can make other plans, DO IT! There are a million programs out there that will help with housing, clothes, food, counseling, etc. all you have to do is reach out and these programs will be glad to help if you need it! If your parents see you as a food stamp check and medi-cal then you've gotta get outta there! There are other programs that can help them also but your main concern now is your daughter and new family! Sorry, I feel very strongly about this because I see stuff like this happen first hand and it's wrong. You shouldn't feel trapped! Get out! Breathe! Relax! Enjoy your family!
Kimejo I wanna thank you for being blunt and honest with me. I have a little girl that I love and she loves me I gotta stop worrying about what I can't control. I am my own person and I need support not bashing. I appreciate each and everyone of you thank you so much for telling me.how it is
I just gotta add my two cents. For whatnots worth if your mom is threatening you or the life of your unborn baby and trying to blackmail u so she can get welfare and medical that is NOT love. I'm sorry but its not! That's a typical abusive relationship. Example: husband beats the tar out of his wife, then when she threatens to leave he cries and told her he never ment to hurt her,he wasn't thinking, blah blah. Bottom line is it will happen again and again until you leave. You now have that little baby to think abt. Who gives a rip if you mom tries to write u off. Sounds like u have a better head on your shoulders than she does. Sorry if i sound mean I have been where u are right now. You need to get out!
Thank you every one. I am trying to keep from going crazy it just hurts because this is my mom
Thank you you guys are truly my support system :) I think I'm gonna post a ultrasound of my daughter because I love her and I want to show her off :)
This sounds like total bs. Your father should be eligible for SSI. You're mother would be eligible for some programs if she was willing to follow state guidelines. That situation is not healthy for your child. Mom must be used to working the system... Which is rather sad. Ask yourself where you want to be in a year .... Five years. And start making changes towards that now. Personally, I'd see the baby as #1. I would leave. You don't need these issues on your plate right now, and especially once baby comes. Tell your mother she can rent her basement to a stranger and see if she gets close to $250 + food stamps + the cost of health insurance. Period. That is sad... And I'm sorry your dealing with it. As hard as leaving sounds... It's easier then this battle.!
Thank you you guys are truly my support system :) I think I'm gonna post a ultrasound of my daughter because I love her and I want to show her off :)
Well in that case you just got your first parenting lesson (how not to treat your children) and you move on. Start your own family and make sure you keep love in your home not pills and greed
I love my daughter with all my heart I'd die for her and I havent even seen her face yet
Unfortunately hun it doesn't sound like they care about YOUR best interest, but their own, that's not the kind of love a parent should give, ever.. I would never treat my kids that way, and I can't imagine you would either.
Can anyone on state assistance explain why they wouldn't cover my dad had a head injury and can't work and my mom just graduated college and can't find a job.
Thank you I'm kinda worried I'll come to find they don't really love me if I move out.
Don't let your boyfriends feeling slip through the cracks, he doesn't want to live there and he is the one standing by you right now and not threatening you and baby, you cant stay so you're parents can mutch off the state and continue benefits cause if they don't qualify without you there they shouldn't need them, (i'm on state aid so i'm not bashing anyone who is) go out and find a safe place for you, your bf, and your child to start your lives together, and if your patents get mad that tipi left cause they won't get benefits anymore then they were only using you to begin with cause they should be happy as long as your happy. Good luck
She's asking you to pay rent when she gets assistance from you? And threatening you with blackmail to take away your insurance if you don't stay? Sounds like your mom is causing all the stress, and after threatening you, that would be enough for me, I'd be GONE. That's not a stable environment.
Well live anyways i felt guilty leaving my moms but i did to get to a stress free environment because it wasn't there she talked about me 24/7 day n night called me all kibda names n all n i was just sick of being there n taljed about my innocent unborn baby kept up mess n i left n aint looking back
Thank you I'm sorry I probably am annoying you all and I don't mean to. It's just I trust you all more than anyone else to give good advice. I'm sorry if I am a bother to any of you.
Plain and simple if you are scared or feel threatened then you need to get out now. Screw their "need" to keep you for their welfare that's not your problem. Your concern now is your baby. If your bf is sticking by you and can help then take it
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