update again mom threatened me

[kimisup]

So today my mon begs me to stay with them and live in the basement to pay rent. 250 a month. That's the entire basement however they can walk up and down as they please. So my problem is my boyfriend doesn't exactly wanna live with them after how I have been treated. He is concerned about our baby. But if I move out my parents lose welfare: food stamps and medical. So they kinda need me. But when I told them the father of my child had concerns they got angry. My mother told.me she was gonna take me off the car insurance plan and etc. So that's where I stand there. Am I in the wrong or dumb for wanting to live there in order to make everyone happy?

[maybaby19]

You need to do what is best for you and your baby. Don't worry about what your parents want or what your boyfriend wants...what is the best environment for you and your baby

[kimisup]

How do I know what the best environment is right now a stress free one is all I want and if I stay here and guarentee I stay here I get that.

[ShellyLette]

First of all, I find your mother to be a bit of a hypocrite or however it's spelled to take you off the car insurance when you're the one helping them recieve their foodstamps and welfare. It sounds to me she's trying to hold onto you as a child, I feel problems will still exist and if not get worse after your baby comes if you were to still live there. Why can't they get welfare if you're not in the home and why can't they get food stamps? I don't feel you're wrong or dumb, you're just a concerned daughter. A very caring one at that. If it were me, I'd done put them in their place and say if it weren't for me you wouldn't be getting so and so, and if I can't be treated with some respect them why should I live here.

[ShellyLette]

How exactly is it stress free to live there if your scared at night and holding your belly because you think your mother will cause you harm?

[baby2_on_the_way]

Well then it sounds like you have made up your mind and want to stay, my concern would be that earlier you stated you and your child may be in danger and if you stay that problem isn't solved

[kimisup]

I guess its not but I don't wanna hurt anyone my.hormones are making me stress and I just need you all to be honest with me.

[kimisup]

I don't want to stay persay I just feel guilty leaving

[jwilliams81]

Plain and simple if you are scared or feel threatened then you need to get out now. Screw their "need" to keep you for their welfare that's not your problem. Your concern now is your baby. If your bf is sticking by you and can help then take it

[kimisup]

Thank you I'm sorry I probably am annoying you all and I don't mean to. It's just I trust you all more than anyone else to give good advice. I'm sorry if I am a bother to any of you.

[keisha2012]

Well live anyways i felt guilty leaving my moms but i did to get to a stress free environment because it wasn't there she talked about me 24/7 day n night called me all kibda names n all n i was just sick of being there n taljed about my innocent unborn baby kept up mess n i left n aint looking back

[KTowne]

She's asking you to pay rent when she gets assistance from you? And threatening you with blackmail to take away your insurance if you don't stay? Sounds like your mom is causing all the stress, and after threatening you, that would be enough for me, I'd be GONE. That's not a stable environment.

[KTowne]

assistance FOR you* sorry

[baby2_on_the_way]

Don't let your boyfriends feeling slip through the cracks, he doesn't want to live there and he is the one standing by you right now and not threatening you and baby, you cant stay so you're parents can mutch off the state and continue benefits cause if they don't qualify without you there they shouldn't need them, (i'm on state aid so i'm not bashing anyone who is) go out and find a safe place for you, your bf, and your child to start your lives together, and if your patents get mad that tipi left cause they won't get benefits anymore then they were only using you to begin with cause they should be happy as long as your happy. Good luck

[kimisup]

Thank you I'm kinda worried I'll come to find they don't really love me if I move out.

[kimisup]

Can anyone on state assistance explain why they wouldn't cover my dad had a head injury and can't work and my mom just graduated college and can't find a job.

[KTowne]

Unfortunately hun it doesn't sound like they care about YOUR best interest, but their own, that's not the kind of love a parent should give, ever.. I would never treat my kids that way, and I can't imagine you would either.

[kimisup]

I love my daughter with all my heart I'd die for her and I havent even seen her face yet

[baby2_on_the_way]

Well in that case you just got your first parenting lesson (how not to treat your children) and you move on. Start your own family and make sure you keep love in your home not pills and greed

[kimisup]

Thank you you guys are truly my support system :) I think I'm gonna post a ultrasound of my daughter because I love her and I want to show her off :)

[nichole75315]

This sounds like total bs. Your father should be eligible for SSI. You're mother would be eligible for some programs if she was willing to follow state guidelines. That situation is not healthy for your child. Mom must be used to working the system... Which is rather sad. Ask yourself where you want to be in a year .... Five years. And start making changes towards that now. Personally, I'd see the baby as #1. I would leave. You don't need these issues on your plate right now, and especially once baby comes. Tell your mother she can rent her basement to a stranger and see if she gets close to $250 + food stamps + the cost of health insurance. Period. That is sad... And I'm sorry your dealing with it. As hard as leaving sounds... It's easier then this battle.!

[kimisup]

Thank you you guys are truly my support system :) I think I'm gonna post a ultrasound of my daughter because I love her and I want to show her off :)

[kimisup]

Thank you every one. I am trying to keep from going crazy it just hurts because this is my mom

[Kimejo_81]

I just gotta add my two cents. For whatnots worth if your mom is threatening you or the life of your unborn baby and trying to blackmail u so she can get welfare and medical that is NOT love. I'm sorry but its not! That's a typical abusive relationship. Example: husband beats the tar out of his wife, then when she threatens to leave he cries and told her he never ment to hurt her,he wasn't thinking, blah blah. Bottom line is it will happen again and again until you leave. You now have that little baby to think abt. Who gives a rip if you mom tries to write u off. Sounds like u have a better head on your shoulders than she does. Sorry if i sound mean I have been where u are right now. You need to get out!

[kimisup]

Kimejo I wanna thank you for being blunt and honest with me. I have a little girl that I love and she loves me I gotta stop worrying about what I can't control. I am my own person and I need support not bashing. I appreciate each and everyone of you thank you so much for telling me.how it is