no need to test :( hurting

[luv2bmommy]

hello ladies, its been a sad day. i just needed to get this off my chest and move on. we have been ttc for months, no luck. i think like 5 months now. i know its small change compared to some but i am starting to feel hopeless already because the wait and the buildup of hope is too much. finally i said well lets just forget it for a while and see what happens, no more stress. so we did that but i let myself get hopeful this month because i was sure i hit one of my ovulation days. i tried not to let myself think i was but i did. anyway it seems like it hit me all at once, the cramps, a little spotting, the back pain, my stupid stupid cycle, and a burst of emotion. i just sat down and cried and cried and CRIED like i havent in a long time. im still sorta weepy. its the first breakdown ive had since we started ttc. and it came from nowhere. i was just sad for a while then i got mad, and i know im wrong but i started to sorta get mad at my husband. i dont know why. its not his fault he cant help it. i guess its because i felt like he didnt care as much as i did. we have everything to offer and everything is just great i dont know. we want it to happen. but i know he isnt capable of the same meltdowns as i have, it doesnt mean he cares less. well, here goes another month. i guess before too long we need to start thinking about outside help from a doc or something i guess if this doesnt work for us. when is it necassary to begin searching for help, and how do i go about doing that? thanks guys. good luck and baby dust to everyone else.

[Michele, Katy, TX]

I'm sorry you are going through this.  Have you tried charting your temps??  I only scanned the other responses, so I wasn't sure.  I just started doing this in like mid December.  I am not currently ttc.  I have actually decided to do this as my own natural family planning method.  But I cannot tell you in that short time just how much I have learned about my cycle.  It is really interesting.  If you decide you want to try, fertility friend is a great site.  Another one of the ladies on the forum uses one called ovusoft.com.  I haven't looked at that one yet though.  You can get the VIP membership for a month for free (on fertility friend).  But you can do the basic charting for free all the time.  I did the VIP for a month and liked it so much, that I paid the small fee to keep the VIP.  It was like $16.95 for 3 months.  Anyway, you may want to take a look.  It really is really interesting.  I know based on my temps exactly when I will start my period and much more.  I really like it.

God bless and I hope you get your BFP really soon!!

[luv2bmommy]

LOL 32 yrs! no that really would be a story of hope! haha but still 2 yrs is a long time too. I really do think it may just be stress and i know theres a science to it like certain days and techniques but i just wasnt prepared to have trouble with it so ive done no research or anything. it happened so naturally with the first two. im sorry you guys are having trouble too, im thankful for these forums. today was the first beautiful day in about a week so i took both girls outside and played, got fresh air, and i just took in their smiling faces like i havent done in a while, i really am blessed with what ive got right now, when and if another baby does come itll be just as good

[KellyA74]

LOL!  I was kind of wondering and stupidly trying to figure out how old she'd be when she had her first child!  Haha!

[dej69]

my sister tried for 2 years before clomid.   not 32 years.   oops.

[dej69]

my sister tried to concieve for 32years before they finally put her on clomid. then after another year when she gave up, she got pregnant. then a few months after having her baby, got pregnant again. she now has 2 beautiful girls. i know it is hard. my husband and i have been trying for a couple of years now, and even succeeded once. unfortunately it was a tubal pregnancy and had to be removed. but i have higher hopes now that i know it is possible.    
when you least expect it, you will get pregnant. don't try so hard.
i am so sorry that you feel sad. i understand. but cant expect our men to feel the same. they may be sad, but they just express it differently. these forums help a lot. keep reading and writing.  let us know when it finally happens for you. good luck

[JoyRenee]

It takes a normal, reproductive woman up to 12 months to conceive. Your doctor won't refer you to a fertility specialist until you have tried for at least 12 months.

:-(  So sorry you're going through this!!! It's okay to cry and be frustrated. It'll help relieve some stress for you to let those feelings out. Try writing them down (you can throw them away if you want) or blog about it, or somehow get those feelings out of you! It's very therapeutic.

You could also try doing some sort of craft or walking to help eleviate some of the stress. Good luck!

[MrsRosario]

Yes he does!!! And I've always told my self 2 things: God will never out something in your path that he thought you couldn't handle, and that everything has a purpose in life, and happens for a reason.

[zoeb2]

you cant let yourself get mad for having emotions.  i miscarried in oct and kept telling myself that everything was fine and that i was ok, but i wasnt.  i even went to work, no time off.  now it is hitting me.  it is ok to feel sad, but know that it will happen and that God has a plan...even though it it may be hard to see what it is at times.  good luck =)

[MrsRosario]

omg!! I thought I was the only one going through this. I just took a test and it was neg! My husband and I have been ttc for about 3-4 months now, and nothing also. I just don;t understand! I mean we had intercousre this month, either everyday sometimes or every other day!  I don't know what to do. I mean I'm only like 2 days late. Is it still too early to tell, or am I stressing?.....ahhhhhhh!!!!

Suzy

[luv2bmommy]

thank you so much! i know i stress about it too much and i need to stop. i was fine in the beginning in the month telling myself it doesnt matter either way, we are happy and just going to take things as they come. but once you have that hope in your mind you subconsiously let it build and build until i convinced myself this was my month, and i was so dissappointed. so my husband a while back said well lets go to peru when i get my big leave next yr and get our mind off of things and that sounds like a good idea. maybe we need to. hes just been great through this whole thing i get shaken easily and hes so mellow! so maybe when we return itll be time to start taking the supplements! im keeping my chin up!

[BritanyG]

Basically they are over the counter drugs that are to help fertilize you, they are like fertility aids. They help increase you chances of becoming pregnant... typ ein this website in your toolbar and it explains about ovulex, there are several other fertility dfrugs that are over the counter also

http://www.ovulex.com/

I hope this helps!!

[lostwithoutyouss]

i think you just need to have patience..not try so hard...i know it's what you want so bad..and i was kind of the same way with my son...i had a miscarrage..and was so sad and never thought i'd be happy again till i had a baby..so my husband agreed to try again..it took a whole year for me to get prego...i am due any day now..and this time i was not trying to get pregnant and it took only a month!  =/ so you'll just never know..maybe thinking about it so much delays it? who knows...good luck tho.

[good2bhere]

Im so sorry about ur stress and greif luv2bmommy...will surely pray for u...im ttc too...im sure there s a little angel waiting for u and when the right time comes ul be blessed so dont give up hope...by taking it off on ur hubby is not going to make a difference...be positive and trust in god and ur prayers will surely be answered...Takecare dear and wish u good luck...

[luv2bmommy]

i have annual exams and everything seems fine, but i havent started with all the extra things yet that could help like you said. What is Ovulex and PreSeed? i do take prenatals but i always have i never quit taking them after my first child. Maybe i need to start looking into that. i cant imagine anything having gone wrong from my second to now but i really havent been trying that long maybe i have my dates wrong. I dont know how the ppl that want children the most end up having the longest wait and most stress! i cant understand it. well a small update is that i recently went to the restroom and still no blood, but plenty cramps still. i think it will come soon though

[KellyA74]

Sorry this is so hard for you......We tried for 7 months before it happened...then a miscarriage and we're trying again...I totally understand the frustration of getting negatives month after month.....We too, have alot to offer. (I feel)....awesome jobs, been together for 6 years, married since April 2007, good relationship, etc ,etc/////It ponders me why those of us who are deserving seem to have the hardest time.....Have you had an annual exam just to make sure you are healthy?  I'm not sure that Dr.s will intervene until you've been trying for a year or more......Have you tried all of the goodies out there...Alot of people talk about Ovulex, I myself ordered PreSeed and tried that this month......I know you don't want to hear that "it will happen"...but chances are, it will.......I'm heading off to bed but will check for your updates in the morning.....Lots of luck and try to stay positive (even though I know it's near impossible at times)......