Anyone else single?

[Sarrah727]

How do you cope with the loneliness, especially when doing things that couples usually get to experience together?

[freetolive]

well  I used to have sadness from this issue. But I found something I enjoy doing alone which is reading romance novels, and everytime I feel lonely I pick out my latest novel and read it a bit . IT sounds cheesy but it actually works. I start to notice all the drama in relationships and think I should be happy alone:) or at least until I do meet someone...

[Nighthawk61]

My mother suffered from PTSD and handled it by reading romance novels. It helped her so much. When i was home and single i have to admit , i read them right along with her, night after night. Why not?  It's as good a way to pass time as any. But, remember, you don't have to necessarily cope with loneliness, you can go out there and find yourself a partner just as easy as reading a book. You just have to be careful and not be desperate. You'll not only meet men, you'll meet women friends that you can pass the time with and find tons of fun stuff to do. As i said, the YWCA is a good place to start, a book club, etc. Good luck and please let us know how you're getting on.

[seanlANG]

Well i have lived both lives, meaning I have been in long relationships and I lived the single life for years. First off are you wanting to date and meet someone? Its a lot easier for a women than it is for a man. If your sick of being alone what effort are you putting in to meet someone? Are you just waiting for a man to fall in your lap? Have you tried getting out? You can meet people on dating websites,bars, church, other groups, etc...If your enjoying the single life ( nothing wrong with that) do things that make you happy and be glad you are single, and dont have to answer to anyone. Im sure it is God's plan for you to meet someone but you do have to put in some effort!

[Nighthawk61]

Welcome Sarrah, what ever you do, don't try to drink (or use drugs) to alleviate a temporary situation. You'll have long term effects for a temporary problem.  As SM said, pets are so wonderful to keep a person company and active (in the case of dog owners)  Being active is a great way to stop a person from becoming depressed., so not only do you save a life, but you add to your own. Cats are so comforting, just their ability to live a relaxed life is so peaceful to be part of. If you would like more noise, a bird that talks or sings can brighten your days in ways like no other.

When i lost my husband when i was 35 i spent 5 years alone. It was very hard on so many levels. I think the best advice i can give to you is hobbies. Hobbies that would have you go out, like the YWCA pool, where you can meet other women and make lasting friendships for just have casual companionship. Be open to be vulnerable and needing the company of friends. Everyone needs friends when they are alone in the world. If you haven't already, join a class or two. Learn how to paint, or take a class that will further you in business. Make sure that you break up your work week , by taking a few hours out and being with others , chances are they'll be those that are single too, and open to doing thing together on those lonely Sunday afternoons. The best thing that you can do for yourself is to meet others your age that are active in the community, that do the bike runs, and go to the summer concerts. or are open to it at your suggestion. Maybe they haven't done those things yet, and you're just the one to suggest it and make it happen in their lives.

Yes, remember, being on your own IS TEMPORARY. Please let us know how you're doing. Do you have many friends that you socialize with now, or do you need to get out there and meet some? The best way to meet partners is through a circle of friends.

My hearts with you. I feel for you. Soon you'll be part of a couple, if that's what you want. Just remember, to keep your expectations high, and don't be afraid to throw a few back before picking your number one.

[specialmom]

Hi and welcome to the forum!  We're glad you found us.  I'm very sorry you are lonely.  I understand.  I married later and had times before I met my husband in between (bad) boyfriends that I felt lonely too.  I know what you are talking about.  Sundays were a hard day because it seemed like everyone was a couple or a family.  I'm truly a person that has no problem being on my own---  in fact, I NEED my alone time.  But you feel a bit of an ache when that is your only option.

I had family that I enjoyed-- a sister with kids.  I would plan things when I noticed a pattern of when I'd be lonely (like Sunday afternoons) with them.  I had single friends that we'd plan things.  I had activities that I enjoyed that I'd get engrossed in.  I had a dog.  That may sound silly but my pet was my constant companion and something for me to nurture and love and to get a bit of love back (I have always had great pets---  so a LOT of love back).  It helped me.  

But also, know that this isn't forever.  When we desire a relationship, it usually happens.  I don't know your situation if you went through a recent break up or find dating hard---  but have faith that you'll meet your special someone to spend your time with.  :>)  Now I'm married with kids----  I have to sneak away to get a moment to myself.  There is an eb and flow to life and if you are open to it, you will meet someone to spend time with.  good luck sweetie and stay in touch/come back.