Lets hear how your guy proposed to you, if he hasn't then lets hear how you would like him to do it.
My husband tried to be sly and pick up my ring one day earlier then I had thought, but the jeweler actually accidently called my house to tell him it was done. I then told the jeweler to call him at his parents house to tell him. Well we didn't tell my husband that I knew. So he came and picked me up and was acting all nervous. (The reason I knew about it was because he talked to my father a couple of days before). Anyways he took me to the lake where we like to hang out on the back of his truck and look at the stars.................I know exciting right. Anyways he got down on one knee and asked if I would marry him, and I said of course. hehehe
My proposal was so unromantic. We had gotten into this big horrendous fight over a past fling I had when I was on vacation prior to meeting my fiance. It had been years but he had found a picture of the two of us and he blew it way out of proportion. I told him that I couldn't take the jealousy and it was stupid and that he was pushing me away. He started crying (which he never does), and he told me that he was so scared because he never loved anyone the way that he loves me and that it frightened him. Two minutes later he was asking me to marry him. Of course I said yes, he's my best friend. We bought the ring a few weeks later and when we were out at a club he had the guy announce over the loud speaker that Richie can't wait to marry you. That was more romantic. Still to this day I tease him saying that my proposal sucked. LOL.
We were in our 1st apartment we were just sitting @ home and he kept looking @ me and I knew something was on his mind. He said to me do you know when I first saw you I new you were the right one I just looked @ him didnt really know what to say he said I have something to tell you I said what he said Would you marry me? I started having tears I said yes.......... I had a surprise for him I was pregant.......His mouth dropped... I been with him since high school.......I always wanted 2 children......Dec. 14th will be 11 years ........WOW It went fast.......I been with him for 14 years dating him april 3rd 1993 when we starting seeing each other he went to my prom my high school sweetheart I got married to......He makes me mad sometimes I love him with all my HEART.
Well me and my husband believe it or not had only been dating a little over a month when he proposed to me. We have know each other for years and our families have known each other since we were kids. He actually got down on one knee on Christmas Eve infront of my whole family. A little embarassing but I couldnt have asked for anything better. We married a couple months later on 2/12 2 days before Valentines Day. We have been married almost 3 years now and we are expecting our first child in January. I remember telling people before we started dating that he would be a wonderful husband for some lady one day. Never thought it would be me but couldnt be any happier.
My proposal was not very romantic at all--We were going out of town with the baseball team (wives and hubbies) for a fun weekend--It was Friday the 13th day before Valentine's. We were running late so I was like, lets get moving...He said Do you wnat your present? I said sure why not--so he gave me the box and I thought--jewlery probably a pair of earrings... I opened it and there was a ring--he said "So do you want to?" I did say yes--and in September it was 8 years--so I guess Friday the 13th is not always unlucky.
ive been waiting to i thought he was going to ask me on our 2 yr annie, but i screwed it up when he asked me to look at rings i thought it was because i said something to him about it. so i said no also i was upset because he ran me down on how i am such a bad gf. if that happened would anyone want to look at rings after that. i love my bf and i want to be engaged with him but then i think of all the fighting and what all has been going on since the birth of our son that i wonder if it will ever happen, nor if i say no to him when he does ask. i am questioning this relationship. the past 2 days has been alright and things have gotten better when he got off work yesterday he took our son right away it was nice to get time to myself for a little while. i told him its not fair that i spend all day w/ the kids with no help and im sick of it and would like time also tomyself. so he has been helping with it its alot better so i dont feel alone as a parent anymore. but what does 2 days tell ya not to much.. i am depressed about not being asked the big question i no so many pple getting married after 6 months that theyve been together and even a yr but my bf told me a year ago that he wants to wait years before he can even say anything about marriage to me. he said what kinda hurt was that when i was pregnant he questioned if he even wanted to ever marry me. it has changed now but then it did hurt because our son was planned and everything. so laura good topic but bad topic for me :( still hasnt happened and dont think it will anytime in the next few years. also we are living with my parents saving money to buy a house and i would like to be out of here in our house and all set up before anything ever happens.. i want a future not a mess...
we dated 6 months before he popped the question, and then we dated for another 8 months before we got married. We have been married for a little over 6.5 years now. I don't suggest it though, made it really hard. The first 5 years of marriage is hard anyways, it was funny it was like as soon as we hit 5 years marriage, everything got easier for us.
Ya 4 years is a long time but I learned dont rush into anything I knew down the road he was going to ask me when he was ready........I knew mt husband was the right one for me cause he told me he loved me, respect me, and never rushed me into anything.........Im glad I met him. Our love is still strong and we are very happy together and 2 handsome boyz, and I cant for get my babtgirl cookie.( my dog...
I know exactly what you mean. My brother got married in June. He was with his gf maybe 5-6 mos before he proposed, they planned a wedding and got married all with 2 yrs. And i havent been proposed to in 5 yrs>! Also im with you on the fighting, ours got alot worse after our baby too. Sometimes i think maybe i dont wanna marry him though. so i guess its good he hasnt proposed yet.
Ladies, marriage isn't all that it's cracked up to be. I've made that trip and to be honest, it doesn't change your feelings abt the person. You are just bound together by a legal document that will take lawyers & money to get out of it. If you read the statistics, at least 50% end in divorce. The rest could be cheating or unhappy or whatever. I'm in no hurry to make that trip again. I like having my own space & I like spending time with someone when it suits us. If I had my way, I'd be engaged forever with a huge diamond. JK.
I do know some good marriages and those are people that are pretty realistic and emotionally mature. Yet, if people have children together, marriage is good b/c it provides protection for that child - monetary, medical, emotional. This isn't to say that single parents can't do a great job, it's just harder and they will have to create a support system with friends & family.
No i def am right with you mayflower, i really am in no rush to get married. And i dont think i could marry my bf because i KNOW it would end in divorce eventually. But i guess my prob is id atleast like to have a ring or something that shows commitment, is that wrong?
You know, not all marriages are bad, and some are great. My husbands sister has a baby with her boyfriend and they live together. He won't propose to her because he has been married once and got screwed out of a bunch of money. His parents own a very big company, and I guess his previous wife put him through the cleaners. Well, he won't marry my husbands sister, and she personally deals with it (I think its because she is after his money and she will go along with whatever). Anyways it seems like many people these days aren't getting married for some reason. I will tell you one thing that if my husband and I weren't married when we were having issues before, I would have been long gone, but since we were married and it takes more to get divorced then just moving out, our marriage lasted and made it. I am glad too because our marriage is great and has been for about 4 years now, we have been married for 6.5.
There maybe a 50% divorce rate, but I think it's because many people give up way too early and don't want to try. I dont' agree with abuse or cheating though.
Avas mom - It's not wrong to want at least some form of commitment from your bf...you know, you can get promise rings and they are not that expensive. That way, you two are making an effort to work things out with each others. Its showing the world that you're promised to each other and I think that's very sweet. Try it. You can buy then anywhere.
Laura, that's true abt ppl not trying and giving up to easily. I always say that marriage is not for the faint of heart. We are in such throw away society and some ppl feel that if it's not working, oh well, just leave (like me). Now I realize that when you make a commitment, it's really for better or worse and hopefully you'll both come out happy in the end. Like the way you and your hubby worked it out and probably matured a bit and now have a great marriage.
They say divorce is too easy but I don't know abt that. I made out ok in my divorce but I didn't care a whole lot abt the money part. I didn't expect to feel like such a failure and to feel so bad about letting people down (like our families). That part was really hard & I wasn't warned abt it. I don't know how ppl can go through 2 or 3 times. I'm just not that strong.
You wanna know the main reason that my husband and I didn't get divorced. I didn't want my mother-in-law to have the satisfaction................. hehehehe
No seriously, it was really really hard at first. Actually my husband and I were talking about this the other night, and I told him that if I had it to do over I probably would've waited another year before we got married. He agreed. But then I thought well if we would've waited then we wouldn't have had our first daughter. So, I guess I can't really say that.
There were many many times though that I just wanted out, and it really was hard work to get through it. It's almost like one morning we woke up and everything got better. Which that was a couple of years ago.
The one thing I am very careful of though is that we don't fall into a comfortable rut.
It must be nice to be able to walk into your home though and everything is exactly where you put it because you don't have other hands messing stuff up.
That's funny abt the mother-lin-law.....Ahh, at least it gives you something to do during the day, keeping her on her toes.....Must give you something to live for, doesn't it??? Don't let the ***** win.
People think that love is enough to make a marriage work but that's only on tv and in movies. In real life it takes love + maturity + the integrity to keep your commitment to the marriage vows. Sounds like you and your husband have those qualities, and were able to work through the rough times. Everyone thinks of walking out at some point. That's perfectly normal. And if you had waited another year to get married, you wouldn't have your daughter and could either of you imagine life without her?? I'm sure you can't. There's a reason for everything Laura.
I almost think it's better to marry young because you haven't had time to develop so many bad habits and have those habits harden into your personality.
Ruts are easy to get into. I can't really give marriage advice but the ppl I've known who are still together after 20 yrs have made time to have date nights and make time to just enjoy each other's company.
That is true abt my apt looking the same at night as when I leave in the morning. I'm really girlie so my apt is really feminine. I don't like junk or clutter so it's always clean. My bf is a professor so his house has a ton of books, magazines, student papers all over the place. And what is the deal with computer stuff? He's got a ton of cords, cables, old printers, hard drives, I would throw that **** out if I could. Another big difference is that he has cool toys (flat screen tv, nice stereo) while I have the same old bulky 24' tv that I bought 7 yrs ago. Still, the older I get, the less I worry abt neatness b/c enjoying family and friends are what life is about. What good is it if you have a spotless home but no friends?
There was an old man that once said the reason that him and his wife lasted 60 years was because neither one was out of love at the same time.
My inlaws aren't really too much in the picture anymore. That was most of our fighting issues at first, and we finally just had enough. I think the day we walked down the ile was the day that his mother started hating me. Then she loved me when I was pregnant, but after I gave birth she hated me again.
She never won though because now she doesn't see her son that often, and she doesn't get to see her grand daughters but every few months or so. I guess she lost.
Sad that his mother couldn't stop being jealous long enough to be happy for her son. I believe that is what her problem is, she is just jealous.
You know one thing that I have figured out is females need to stop worrying so much about the actual wedding day, and worry about what comes after the wedding day. My husband and I should've done that, and that would've saved many arguments between us. We still argue, but not at all even close to the way it use to be. I guess your right it comes with maturity.
Have I told you the story about how we ended up pregnant with our first daughter?
My doc put me on predizone and didn't tell me it messed up birth control pill. Well the day that my great grandma died, the doc asked everyone who could be pregnant to leave the room because he needed to do an x-ray. I laughed because I didn't think I could be, but I left anyways. It turns out that I was pregnant. My family missed 5 generations of females by 6 months.
I think that was the other problem with my husband and I fighting, we not only had to get used to being married and living together, now he had to get used to living with a pregnant female, and then our first daughter had colic really bad too.
That is why I am so stern that females wait to get pregnant till they have been used to marriage first. Too hard to do everything all at once. Sometimes it can't be avoided though.
Do you have kids?
My house is no where near spotless. hehehe
It is live in clean. If that makes sense.
Thanks Laura ~ sometimes I love your quarky questions ! They help me think back and make my heart flutter!!!
It was december, we had a christmas tree up. I was sitting on the couch when he walked over to the tree and said "where did we get this ornament from?' I continued to sit and said i dunno probably your sis, what does it look like?
He said "come and see " I said " no my leg really hurts," so that night he gave up... lol
Next day , same attempt , I again on the couch, him at the tree asking for me to come and see this ornament, I was whinning that my leg hurt and couldnt he just take the darn thing off the tree and show me. Well I decided to get up and look , and he moved away from the tree, i was asking where is this ornament? he says towards the back. I could not find what I thought he was talking about.
What I thought was just a regular ol ornament, was a star shaped purple velvet box.(w/ a screw through the top and some fishing line to hang it !! LOL )!
I did'nt know it was velvet at the time until I touched it......thats when I knew what it was. Inside was a poem to me, I read while he was on his knee...when i finished he proposed! Only to tease me about not getting up the night before! We cried and laughed
He asked my parents before hand too ! I love his old soul !
No, never had kids. I was just never sure about them & with my ex, it just didn't feel right. I tried for a while but never got pregnant. Now I am too old and can't anyway ...lol...Plus, the rest of my family is great at reproducing so there are lots of nieces & nephews and seems like there is always a baby somewhere.
Here's something for young mothers - my sister-in-law has her first child at 16! When she married my brother, she had just turned 16 & was 4 months pregnant with the first of 3 kids. That daughter is now 31, married and has 2 children of her own. They are great kids, extremely bright and fun to be around - but I'm not prejudice ;D. (I'm Godmother to the youngest) . I know it's hard to be a young mother but I've seen the success of it as well. My sister-in-law says that she is happy she had kids young b/c she had the energy to enjoy them. And she was - is - a good mom. Now she is able to enjoy her grandchildren and still have lots of energy!!!! She looks young too. I think kids can keep you young.
That's weird that you knew you should leave during the x-ray. Sorry that you missed the 6 generations of females. That would have been cool. I'm sure you're grandma is looking down from heaven smiling though....
Your husband sounds like a good man. My youngest brother lives in a house full of women and he loves it too. I know he worries about his daughter but he's been a great dad to her so I hope she choses a man like him when she finally gets married.
They should have classes in high school - maybe during health class - and talk about marriage and budgets and careers and children, life stuff. At least it will give kids a chance to think about the struggles they will face and maybe how they can deal with them effectively. Our role models are our parents and for some of us, that wasn't so great. However even with bad role models, there have been kids that went on to have great marriages, successful careers and be wonderful parents to their kids. I have seen miracles happen within my own family. I really believe in possibilities when people look on the bright side of situations and have faith in God.
I've been helping a friend move today so am exhausted and need my sleep now...have a good night!
Yeah my husband asked my dad too.................cause I told him he had to hehehehe
I think that is an important thing for them to do. Gives the father one last role of being the head person of their daughters lives.
Yes i would like atleast a promise ring i guess that would help a bit. I just dont know if i could stay married to him and seeing as i wouldnt be 100% sure i shouldnt risk it. I wonder if the fact that hes my first real bf and my first ....um...sexual partner is a reason i couldnt either. I havent experienced enough. I do wish i would of waited to have my baby because back then i really thought i could marry him and now i dont think so and my daughter will be the one who gets hurt. Im confused im just going to wait til im done with school and get my job to see how things go. Thats only a few months away. I think alot of our fighting has to do with me being home all day basically the last 2 yrs. I didnt work while preg i was too sick and i dont work now because daycare would cost too much. I go crazy being home all day and then we fight over the usual cleaning the house and money etc...
I wouldn't do it until you are completely sure. Its really not about the ring. Although us females like getting the ring and showing it off, you can really just go treat yourself to a nice new ring. You are in the same boat as us. I don't work because I would be working to pay for daycare expenses, so there is no point. We make too much money, but not enough I guess.
Yeah i know what you mean id love to have a nice big rock!!! I think after 5 yrs and a baby i deserve that much! aNyway im not working now but after school i def will be and maybe by then i will decided what to do if things arent better. Isnt the cost of daycare ridiculous? My best friends lil bro goes to daycare, actually now hes in something else but when he did he was 2 and his mom payed $1,000 a month for it! WHo can afford that?~!
well heres the thing about daycare, if you know someone that has one of those in home daycares, they are cheaper, but I won't do that because you just never know what is going on in there. Many times there are abuse and neglect. Not always, but I am not going to take that chance. Then you have the church daycares, and this is where I would put my girls if I had to. It would cost me 250.00 a week to put them in there though. So it's just not worth it. Plus you have to figure that they will get sick more often because they are around kids more. Now the nice thing is single moms can usually get help for daycare expenses so that they can work.
Which now my 5 year old is in kindergarten, but we just switched her to a private one and that costs money each month, and then plus 150.00 a week for my 2 year old to go to day care, NO WAY! That is just too much money.
I have been with my bf for 5yrs and 3months and well we talk ab it..and he said he want to marry me...but he doesnt have money for the ring he wants to get me ...he wants us to get our Bachelors degree and then get married....I agree with him...but i want to get engaged and married already! his brother proposed to his gf of 3 yrs and uhh...i got bothered...and my bf knew it...he then told me that we will get married, but just to wait! ughhhhh....i wish i could already....
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